I feel like crap!
 

I wasn't expecting this in quite this way but christ I feel like cr*p!
I am so very, very tired & OH & I seem to be at loggerheads & am not sure why:thumbdown:
We've emigrated before, not to Aus but even so was expecting stress but not quite like this! Thought we were stronger as a couple blah, blah blah!
Maybe I underestimated how difficult it would be, for different reasons, for both of us to say goodbye to family!
I almost wish we were leaving tomorrow!

Any advice?
I really need to hear that what I am going through is normal but obviously, intrue BE style, feel free to tell me that I really have a problem!;)

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Well, obviously the 12 people who have viewed this don't even think it worthy of a comment!
Werll, **** you! I have tried to support people over the past year that I have been a member & now that I actually need some support there is f all so goodbye!

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Oh,please dont get poopy with people,its difficult to know what to say.
I do think it it normal,i had wanted to come here for years and the few weeks running up to leaving i was awful.Going off at the kids and hubbby all the time,and really didnt understand why,but its a llife changing event and you are bound to feel uncertain.
Having said that we have been here 4 years now and it is def worth it,hang on in there:):D

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Can sympathise with you - emigrating is easy - its the goodbyes that are killers - and the stress levels that go through the roof - its a good thing really that you n your OH can row, much better to be getting it out so you can discuss it than keeping it all hidden and ending up in ww3/bitter etc...

Totally normal to be having all these emotions! xxx

Re: I feel like crap!
 

exactly, am rubbish at giving serious advice, but good with the humour:) (well i think so, anyway:lol:)
The whole process is a nightmare, the worst i felt was two weeks before leaving, i felt verrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyy sick and lonely realising what i was leaving, we had sold our house and were living in a borrowed house for abour a month (it was a friends grans), so had lost all our home comforts, when i think back it was actually a relief to get here, you are at one of the hardest points just now, hang in there:)

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Hi.

We went through the exact same when we migrated from the UK to NZ. Everything went according to plan (!!) but then the last 2-3 weeks before leaving, we were just finalising the house sale/removals etc. and it actually dawned on us the full extent of what we were doing! We were both very scared and didn't voice these fears to each other - frightened that one of us would say they had changed their minds and no longer wanted to go. So, we kept it quiet and tried to carry on as normal (as you can be). Once we were in NZ and the pressure was off, we started bitching at each other all the time! We went through a couple of months were we just couldn't speak without shouting and a lot of nasty things were said!

Once we'd worked out that it was just the stress and sat down and talked (and made up ;) ) then we were ok. It took a while for us to realise that it was beyond our control at first, then fear just carried us along.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, you're doing probably one of the most risky/amazing/stressful things in your life and it doesn't always come easy! It's normal to feel like this.

If you need to talk, please do PM me. I know I'm a new member but I've been there and survived it. Keep your chin up xx

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Thank you all!
I just thought that we were doing ok & suddenly we can barely be civil!:confused:
I had to walk away from him in Sainsburys earlier or I really would have let rip!
Can't do it back home as staying with the in-laws!
I think that really I am really resentful for being the one who only just finished work but still has to think of everything & will be the first one working when we get to Aus:frown:
God I am such a bitch!:huh: When did tihis happen?

Re: I feel like crap!
 

And well, what can I say to you Sally?
Apart from take a breath and relax, go grab your OH and take him to a nice pub for a couple of hours and say 'We need a break' and just spend some time together that isn't about emigrating, packing, visas, boxes, bubblewrap, tickets, passports, phonecalls, suitcases and boxes.
Just breath.

And no you're not a bitch. You're human. And staying with the in-laws... whoa!!!

Grab your man and go get some couple time.

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Very sensible advice :thumbsup:

Re: I feel like crap!
 

No chance of couple time over next few days, we are travelling the country!
I just want normal life to resume asap but aint gonna happen for a litle while!
Am really struggling to keep some perspective tonight & even feel guilty for that!

Really sorry guys! Having a really low one tonight! I really need some red wine!:thumbup::D

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Well travelling the country or not, you still need to eat and drink. ;)

Lots of pubs just off the motorway.

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Hey, big hugs, 5 years ago to the week I was doing exactly what you are doing now, and going through the farewells.
It's normal, thats the first thing to remember :) Completely totally normal. You are going through all your own emotions about going to a new environment, and you also have to deal with all the feelings being projected by those around you. You burst into tears at the drop of a hat, and you wonder how on earth you will get to the aircraft!

How to deal with it? Varies from person to person. My own strategy was to keep reminding myself why I was doing it, and to remind myself it was Au Revoir, not goodbye. Sounds corny but it worked then and it still works now whenever I come home on holiday. If you work out roughly when you will see people again - a year, 2 years, whatever, and then fix that as something to work towards. If they are likely to visit you here first then you can have some kind of plan for "we'll aim for you to visit in 9 months" or something like that. Gives you all something to work towards, and it can be like a beacon in the distance. :)
Don't know if that'll help at all, but it works for some.

Re: I feel like crap!
 

That was one of the reasons we booked into a hotel the night b4 we flew - just to have a night off from everyone and everything!
Just us n kids - and it was a really good night, all talked to each other about how exciting but scarey it was.

On arrival you kick into 'mental' mode as theres so much to organise in so little time, its only after the dust settles a good couple of months, that you can draw breath and say WOW...

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Maybe the trouble is that I actually really loved my job & the people that I cared for & I think that I am grieving just a bit for that! Something that I really do not expect my supermarket manager husband to understand!
Anyway, whatever it is, it really feels crap tonight!
Thank you to those who have contributed to this thread because you have helped, maybe not tonight but definitely tomorrow!;)
To those who looked & did not comment, I hope that next time you read that a fellow BE memeber is in distress, you decide that you can post a word or two of encouragement. It makes a difference!

Re: I feel like crap!
 

Have actually managed to convince OH that staying in hotel night before is really good plan:thumbup: