how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Feb 15th 2007, 10:02 pm
#1
Never going back
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: New South Wales!!!!!!!
Posts: 3,656
how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
and you throw the towel in?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
Feb 15th 2007, 10:06 pm
#2
Happy migrant
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Newcastle , NSW
Posts: 6,756
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Hope things work out for you soon babe.
If you could get a job would you want to stay?
If you could get a job would you want to stay?
Feb 15th 2007, 10:17 pm
#3
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Dec 2006
Location: EK to DFW
Posts: 1,725
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Hey there, sorry to hear that you are feeling so low! I am in a similar situation to you in that we have been in TX for eight months now. We came here with my OH's job and hoping for a better life for us and our 1.5 kids.
So far things have been pretty good. I just got back from my first trip back to the UK and am in a downer and at a bit of a loss as to where I think home is! I think what I'm trying to say is give in some more time, I know it's frustrating but it's a once in a life time opportunity and I hope that you don't give up too early.
You're not alone and there will be something out there for you. Just try and stay positive! Good luck!
So far things have been pretty good. I just got back from my first trip back to the UK and am in a downer and at a bit of a loss as to where I think home is! I think what I'm trying to say is give in some more time, I know it's frustrating but it's a once in a life time opportunity and I hope that you don't give up too early.
You're not alone and there will be something out there for you. Just try and stay positive! Good luck!
Feb 15th 2007, 10:20 pm
#4
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: In the hilly bit around Perth WA :)
Posts: 814
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
and you throw the towel in?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
You must already know that the UK is the same re courtesy - there are few including professional organisations that bother to let unsuccesful candidates know the outcome of their interviews. This has nothing to do with you and your self worth - it's incompetence and lack of compassion in HR - nothing more.
Secondly, i'm an employer in the UK. and this is the bit I dont want you to take the wrong way - please.
Have you reassessed your interview techniques ? Are you too friendly ? Are you too forward ? Are you too desperate ? Is the job beneath you and do you show too much knowledge ? For instance - I wouldn't employ a cleaner who has aspirations of PA to Tony Blair ? ( as he/she wont stay long and be part of the team ) Do you alter your CV to suit the job ? Do you show disinterest as the job you could do with your eyes closed ?
Only you know how you think you do at interview stage - get some friends to interview you perhaps ?
Feb 15th 2007, 10:20 pm
#5
I'm now an Aussie too!!!
Joined: May 2006
Location: 'Home by the Sea' Elanora
Posts: 5,030
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
and you throw the towel in?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
Feb 15th 2007, 10:43 pm
#6
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Hill overlooking the SE Melbourne suburbs
Posts: 16,622
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Have you reassessed your interview techniques ? Are you too friendly ? Are you too forward ? Are you too desperate ? Is the job beneath you and do you show too much knowledge ? For instance - I wouldn't employ a cleaner who has aspirations of PA to Tony Blair ? ( as he/she wont stay long and be part of the team ) Do you alter your CV to suit the job ? Do you show disinterest as the job you could do with your eyes closed ?
<copied to other post by Sleeping beauty>
I think some of the more routine admin work is hard to find as often migrants have skills or more accurately, energies that frankly put off local employers.
I think a shedload of tact and the way you carry yourself is the most important thing in a slower, local market. Not necessarily the CV. Therefore it is crucial to make personal contact - hard as it may be. I have a general CV which plays down most of my 'office' or work experience. It makes me look like a practical navvy and hard bastard rather than an ex blue-chip consultant.
</copied to other post by Sleeping beauty>
You might have found your UK jobs by a series of referrals or networking. It might have been just as hard to find one in the UK.
Last edited by BadgeIsBack; Feb 15th 2007 at 10:46 pm.
Feb 15th 2007, 10:45 pm
#7
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Joined: Oct 2006
Location: In the hilly bit around Perth WA :)
Posts: 814
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
<copied to other post by Sleeping beauty>
I think some of the more routine admin work is hard to find as often migrants have skills or more accurately, energies that frankly put off local employers.
I think a shedload of tact and the way you carry yourself is the most important thing in a slower, local market. Not necessarily the CV. Therefore it is crucial to make personal contact - hard as it may be. I have a general CV which plays down most of my work experience. It makes me look like a practical navvy and hard bastard rather than an ex blue-chip consultant.
</copied to other post by Sleeping beauty>
I think some of the more routine admin work is hard to find as often migrants have skills or more accurately, energies that frankly put off local employers.
I think a shedload of tact and the way you carry yourself is the most important thing in a slower, local market. Not necessarily the CV. Therefore it is crucial to make personal contact - hard as it may be. I have a general CV which plays down most of my work experience. It makes me look like a practical navvy and hard bastard rather than an ex blue-chip consultant.
</copied to other post by Sleeping beauty>
Feb 15th 2007, 10:52 pm
#8
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Hill overlooking the SE Melbourne suburbs
Posts: 16,622
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Yup. But in my case, I haven't tailored it to a job, I've tailored it to a way of life, working culture, the very essence of what is expected from a bloke. Jumping out of aeroplanes, drilling, firefighting, leadership and pissing in a pot in a field is very different to a meeting,or managing metrics in an office.
I show people my other CV and they are 'amused' at all the practical things I have done, when it comes to work, they only really know the 'office' me. People have told me they would interview me just to see what I looked like. lol.
But I think tact and savvy is a biggie.
I show people my other CV and they are 'amused' at all the practical things I have done, when it comes to work, they only really know the 'office' me. People have told me they would interview me just to see what I looked like. lol.
But I think tact and savvy is a biggie.
Feb 15th 2007, 10:52 pm
#9
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2004
Location: Gold Coast
Posts: 909
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
I hope you find something soon. We have been here nearly 10 months and in that time ive had a couple of jobs that i have left as the hours were appalling,i was working 4 nights a week and every weekend. I packed it in the week before xmas as i never saw my son one day to the next.
Since then i have applied for loads but dont seem to be getting anywhere. Most of them dont even acknowledge your resume and i have only had 1 interview. I never got the job.
I just keep thinking that things will get better and I will get a job because I have to.
Positive thinking WE WILL GET JOBS!!!!!!
Since then i have applied for loads but dont seem to be getting anywhere. Most of them dont even acknowledge your resume and i have only had 1 interview. I never got the job.
I just keep thinking that things will get better and I will get a job because I have to.
Positive thinking WE WILL GET JOBS!!!!!!
Feb 15th 2007, 10:59 pm
#10
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: In the hilly bit around Perth WA :)
Posts: 814
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
I can see where you're coming from yes. To be fair the thought of getting a regualr job would horrify me, having worked for myself for the last 18 years.
I did once have a professional cv drawn up - it was dead scary
and sure to put people off below MD level 
I am hoping to set up my own business in Perth but my OH has told me I have to have a couple of months off work - He must be nuts!
Seriously though - SB - good luck - please don't feel so down, there has to be something there for you so keep at it , try and take an objective view from an employers point of view and talk to others, you are not worthless - you are you - you have something to offer - just need the right person to see it
I did once have a professional cv drawn up - it was dead scary
and sure to put people off below MD level I am hoping to set up my own business in Perth but my OH has told me I have to have a couple of months off work - He must be nuts!
Seriously though - SB - good luck - please don't feel so down, there has to be something there for you so keep at it , try and take an objective view from an employers point of view and talk to others, you are not worthless - you are you - you have something to offer - just need the right person to see it
Feb 15th 2007, 11:15 pm
#11
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: WA but NOT Perth!!!!!
Posts: 3,318
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
From what i've seen a lot of it is down to WHO you know - do you know many aussies? if not i'd start by finding ways to meet some (join clubs etc) and get to know them a bit, then bring it up a few times in conversation that you're looking for work (no doubt they'll ask what you do anyway so ideal time to mention it)
The other thing is start up conversations wherever you go, supermarket, pharmacy, whatever and make sure they know you're looking
The more people you mention it to the more likely you are to find something
in the meantime have you thought about joining an agency and doing temp work? a friend of mine did this a while back and said she ended up with a permanent position
good luck
The other thing is start up conversations wherever you go, supermarket, pharmacy, whatever and make sure they know you're looking
The more people you mention it to the more likely you are to find something
in the meantime have you thought about joining an agency and doing temp work? a friend of mine did this a while back and said she ended up with a permanent position
good luck
Feb 15th 2007, 11:16 pm
#12
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: In a house
Posts: 2,590
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
and you throw the towel in?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
............we have been here 6 months now, and i have applied for many many jobs, most of them well below my capabilities, including cleaning and working in supermarkets. still nothing. i have had in total 4 interviews in that time span. most companies dont even bother with a courtesy letter/e-mail telling me that i am not good enough
i now feel, is it worth it? should we not just quit whilst we are ahead, and go back to the UK. our financial situation is not dire, we do have some savings, but this is being delved into every week, as my O/H wage is not enough to live off. we didnt come over here for the minimum of the 2 years, just to obtain citizenship, to keep our options open. we came over here for good, with the intention of a better life for us and our children. this is not happening at the moment, as we are at each throats most of the time. i am so stressed out over the job lark, that most days i am not a nice person to be around, and this has an obvious effect on my relationship and on my kids. i just feel so low about it all, my self esteem and self worth is at rock bottom. i applied for a job yesterday, and my thoughts were it has probably already got somebody's name on it, so why should i bother applying. but the very small 5% of my thought process was............what if it is an open post, and i did make the grade, if i didnt apply, i would never know!
i didnt expect a job to fall into my lap, i knew that i would have to put myself out there, but i was not prepared for this long slog. if i am feeling this crap about it, should we not just bog off back to blighty and try and pick up our old lives again?
Only you have the answers and I hope you find them soon!
Feb 16th 2007, 5:55 am
#13
Never going back
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: New South Wales!!!!!!!
Posts: 3,656
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
i think me working would make all the difference. this isnt a slag off australia post by any means. its just the work situation, which has a knock on effect with my personal life. i dont what else i can do, thats all? so if i cant do anything else, should we just quit (not that i am usually a quitter). i just feel as though all the fight in me has been squeezed out.
Feb 16th 2007, 5:57 am
#14
Never going back
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: New South Wales!!!!!!!
Posts: 3,656
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Hey there, sorry to hear that you are feeling so low! I am in a similar situation to you in that we have been in TX for eight months now. We came here with my OH's job and hoping for a better life for us and our 1.5 kids.
So far things have been pretty good. I just got back from my first trip back to the UK and am in a downer and at a bit of a loss as to where I think home is! I think what I'm trying to say is give in some more time, I know it's frustrating but it's a once in a life time opportunity and I hope that you don't give up too early.
You're not alone and there will be something out there for you. Just try and stay positive! Good luck!
So far things have been pretty good. I just got back from my first trip back to the UK and am in a downer and at a bit of a loss as to where I think home is! I think what I'm trying to say is give in some more time, I know it's frustrating but it's a once in a life time opportunity and I hope that you don't give up too early.
You're not alone and there will be something out there for you. Just try and stay positive! Good luck!
Feb 16th 2007, 6:06 am
#15
Never going back
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: New South Wales!!!!!!!
Posts: 3,656
Re: how long do you leave it before it gets the better of you......
Firstly - please don't take this post the wrong way
You must already know that the UK is the same re courtesy - there are few including professional organisations that bother to let unsuccesful candidates know the outcome of their interviews. This has nothing to do with you and your self worth - it's incompetence and lack of compassion in HR - nothing more.
Secondly, i'm an employer in the UK. and this is the bit I dont want you to take the wrong way - please.
Have you reassessed your interview techniques ? Are you too friendly ? Are you too forward ? Are you too desperate ? Is the job beneath you and do you show too much knowledge ? For instance - I wouldn't employ a cleaner who has aspirations of PA to Tony Blair ? ( as he/she wont stay long and be part of the team ) Do you alter your CV to suit the job ? Do you show disinterest as the job you could do with your eyes closed ?
Only you know how you think you do at interview stage - get some friends to interview you perhaps ?
You must already know that the UK is the same re courtesy - there are few including professional organisations that bother to let unsuccesful candidates know the outcome of their interviews. This has nothing to do with you and your self worth - it's incompetence and lack of compassion in HR - nothing more.
Secondly, i'm an employer in the UK. and this is the bit I dont want you to take the wrong way - please.
Have you reassessed your interview techniques ? Are you too friendly ? Are you too forward ? Are you too desperate ? Is the job beneath you and do you show too much knowledge ? For instance - I wouldn't employ a cleaner who has aspirations of PA to Tony Blair ? ( as he/she wont stay long and be part of the team ) Do you alter your CV to suit the job ? Do you show disinterest as the job you could do with your eyes closed ?
Only you know how you think you do at interview stage - get some friends to interview you perhaps ?
i have just had a second interview for a company, which was sitting with the girl that was leaving for an hour or so, to see how is did. another candidate (an internal applicant) got the position as (now this info is 2nd hand, so.....), they were the better candidate on the phone. i was too english, and she was more open and friendly, like an aussie (thats because she was). in other words, i was being professional on the phone, but they wanted a more laid back approach. huh? so, in that case, i am never going to get a job which involves phone answering, because thats how i asnwer the phone. i have done lots of telephone technique course, but in the uk of course, and would find it hard to alter how i answer the phone.