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-   -   Getting the call! (https://britishexpats.com/forum/barbie-92/getting-call-753433/)

ponyrama Apr 1st 2012 7:26 am

Getting the call!
 
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

rasen78 Apr 1st 2012 7:42 am

Re: Getting the call!
 
OH Pony I am so sorry for your loss.

I wish I had words of wisdom for you. Just my sympathies and thoughts for you and your family Xx

eddie007 Apr 1st 2012 7:43 am

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

I have no idea how other people cope... I dont cope... I try to put on a front and carry on.... And the periods of overwhelming grief become less frequent....and eventually after a long time ...I just remember the good times....

So very very sorry for your loss........

Dorothy Apr 1st 2012 7:46 am

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

Very very sorry for your loss. It's never an easy call for anyone.

You get through it one day at a time. And trust me, in time it will get easier. For now though take care of yourself as much as you can.

northernbird Apr 1st 2012 8:05 am

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

Oh no, thats awful. I am so sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with your family x

RedT Apr 1st 2012 8:07 am

Re: Getting the call!
 
So sorry for your loss Ponyrama, no words of wisdom here either except grieve (don't keep it in) and time will lessen the pain, you'll remember the good times.

Therese x

Pollyana Apr 1st 2012 8:10 am

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

A way to come to terms with it? You find time for yourself, somewhere peaceful and then you talk to his spirit. I still do it, several years later, and he still speaks to me, sometimes when I least expect it - I hear his voice on the wind. :)

Sending hugs for you, and wishing you the strength to cope.

xx

brissybee Apr 1st 2012 9:05 am

Re: Getting the call!
 
I am very sorry for your unexpected loss.

I think that's the hardest thing to deal with, when it comes unexpectedly.

I hope you might find consolation in the fact that his passing was not drawn out and he passed away peacefully.

I believe he will always be there for you in spirit... and share your happy memories. x

ponyrama Apr 1st 2012 10:50 am

Re: Getting the call!
 
Thanks everyone for your kind words. I have never appreciated before how much a few words do actually mean at a time like this. Bless you all for taking the time. xox

itigo Apr 1st 2012 11:14 am

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9983086)
Thanks everyone for your kind words. I have never appreciated before how much a few words do actually mean at a time like this. Bless you all for taking the time. xox

I am so sorry for your loss. I think people have said what I would say. Don't be afraid to let your grief out. And expect it to appear at odd times. Just go with it and be gentle on yourself.

It does lessen over time but remembering happy memories and funny stories always helps me.

Like Polly said, I speak to Mum quite frequently and I know she is looking down on us......

Take care..xx

Exod-us Apr 1st 2012 12:24 pm

Re: Getting the call!
 
((((()))))

I'm sorry.

quoll Apr 1st 2012 1:05 pm

Re: Getting the call!
 
(((hugs))) so sorry for your loss, my sympathies to you and your family. I dont know that anything is going to make it "better" except time and perhaps being with people who know what you are going through.

Kapri Apr 1st 2012 1:27 pm

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)
I got the call. Last wednesday 5.00am.

My lovely Dad had gone into day surgery for a routine procedure and he didn't wake up. I had to get dressed and drive round to my sisters to tell her - probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.

We both flew home on Thursday and we are now having to deal with organising everything, funeral will be on Maundy Thursday (there was an autopsy which has delayed things).

I hadn't spoken to my Dad for a few weeks before this happened, too busy out doing my own thing and always meaning to call back but not getting round to it.

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx


Sorry to hear your news. Big hugs for you xx

Cheetah7 Apr 1st 2012 3:47 pm

Re: Getting the call!
 
Take one day at a time, deal with each moment and emotion as it arises, be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to grieve.

I am so very very sorry for your loss and the pain you are going through, wish there was something I could say that would help.:(

soapy© Apr 1st 2012 8:22 pm

Re: Getting the call!
 

Originally Posted by ponyrama (Post 9982873)

How do you deal with it? I know lots of you have had to do this - how do you get through? xxx

pretend your the strong one!
your going to help everyone else through this.
worked for me

sorry to hear of your loss

that dreaded phone call, when you really do feel at the other side of the world.


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