B****y In-Laws
Feb 27th 2006, 4:08 am
#31
Sunny Sydney
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Sydney
Posts: 6,241
Re: B****y In-Laws
Thanks for all the support everyone, it means a lot.
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
Feb 27th 2006, 4:33 am
#32
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 732
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by WendyC
Good for you is all I can say.
Don't let them use emotional blackmail. What if they wanted to retire to Spain or somewhere, would they expect you to carry on like that, I don't think so do you. Next time they tell you your selfish tell them that they are the selfish ones for not thinking about whats best for THEIR son and grandchildren, that'll knock the wind outta their sails.
It makes me realise just how lucky we are. Our MIL is really pleased for us, BIL probably doesn't give a toss and my brother probably doesn't realise what's going on.
The hard part for me is leaving my 18 year old Son behind, but he's made his choice and I respect that. I'll always be there if he needs me.
Don't let them use emotional blackmail. What if they wanted to retire to Spain or somewhere, would they expect you to carry on like that, I don't think so do you. Next time they tell you your selfish tell them that they are the selfish ones for not thinking about whats best for THEIR son and grandchildren, that'll knock the wind outta their sails.
It makes me realise just how lucky we are. Our MIL is really pleased for us, BIL probably doesn't give a toss and my brother probably doesn't realise what's going on.
The hard part for me is leaving my 18 year old Son behind, but he's made his choice and I respect that. I'll always be there if he needs me.
I sympathise with you. I'm also leaving my 19 year old behind. he was born overseas and we came back to the UK when he was 13. He says he's not moving again and that he'll miss us. At least he has a good job.
I keep hoping he'll change his mind but we've told him we'll pay for a ticket once a year so he can come on holiday. Of course thats only til he's 45
Everyone has to do the best for their family and it is their decision alone.
Life is for living and as me old dad says, you only live once!!
Feb 27th 2006, 4:34 am
#33
here and staying
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: happy in the hills of Perth......
Posts: 4,351
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by herrchook
Thanks for all the support everyone, it means a lot.
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
If i send you one of us can you do me one too, pretty please
Just because they don't agree with what your doing, so long as your all happy say what i said b*llcks to them! their loss not yours!
Feb 27th 2006, 4:52 am
#34
Melbourne Australia
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,169
Re: B****y In-Laws
Actually why not change the blame game.
Why didn't they take up the £10 offer back in the 60's and 70's for you.
Why have they let you endure such misery and hardship?
What support could they offer if they cant see through their own ignorance?
Are they so self loathing and lacking in self esteem that they need a sense of control over your lives?
Why would you want your kids to be associated with short sighted grandparents who have nothing of value to contribute?
They talk of heritage - your kids will learn alot more about what went on in the war - Singapore/treatment of colonials/ not all what they want to hear.
Why didn't they take up the £10 offer back in the 60's and 70's for you.
Why have they let you endure such misery and hardship?
What support could they offer if they cant see through their own ignorance?
Are they so self loathing and lacking in self esteem that they need a sense of control over your lives?
Why would you want your kids to be associated with short sighted grandparents who have nothing of value to contribute?
They talk of heritage - your kids will learn alot more about what went on in the war - Singapore/treatment of colonials/ not all what they want to hear.
Feb 27th 2006, 5:55 am
#35
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 4,365
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by herrchook
AAArrrghhhhhhhh,
RANT ALERT
this weekend past was supposed to lovely. It was hubby's folks' Ruby Wedding Anniversary. They planned to take us (hubby and I, his 2 brothers and sil) to dinner and we were surprising them with a stretch limo to take them there (might I add at this point that "I" thought of it, planned and booked it, if it was up to all of them, nothing special would have been done).
So, we all turn up and mil's face is a picture when limo appears. We have a lovely journey, some champers and sil announces she's preggers. Excellent thought hubby and I, we can't get hit with the old "you're taking away our only grandchildren" chestnut anymore. Plus we were delighted for them too.
Lovely meal, but every time Oz gets mentioned you'd think we'd just told an obscenely dirty joke or something - looks could kill!!
Next day, hubby's out of site fixing the PC upstairs and they pounced on me - literally.
Geez, I got an hour of "you've no idea what you're doing, fil can't travel that far at his age, I would never do that to my family if I loved them, we've no right going without going on holiday first to check it out, we've no right to deny our children their heritage blah blah blah
AARRRHGGGHHHHH
I was absolutely fuming mad. So much so I've even told hubby that I'm not going back up there again unless he's with me. I am not under any circumstances going to sit and defend my decision to them any more. They are not going to change our minds so they are just going to have to learn to live with it, and the more they turn on the guilt trips, the further away they're pushing us. When we see them next we are going to tell them that we won't be mentioning moving again. If they want to ask us or add something constructive or positive then fine, but we don't want to hear another word. And if I ever find out that they've said anything negative to the girls then heaven help them
I really can't tell you how angry I was. I'm a really really placid person, wouldn't say boo to a goose but this is just going to far. They wait until we're apart then pounce!
To make matters worse it was my sil who's usually one my side who was the worst (must be the hormones ). She actually sat there and said that they'd thought about doing it a few years ago but they just couldn't do that to their families and they think we're wrong and very selfish and probably won't even be able to stay the distance anyway and will come back with nothing - very nice!!!
You know what they can all go and F*** Off. Hubby and I are doing this for OUR family, for an adventure, for hopefully a better way of life and to open our eyes to the fact that there's more to life than this!! The world's a huge place, we just want to experience it, not just let it slip by living somewhere we hate. We want our kids to grow up in a multicultural society and appreciate and embrace different lifetyles and cultures. We want to live somewhere where we can get outside and not freeze, we want our kids to have a healthier lifestyle and none of that will happen here.
If you're still with me - well done. I just needed to get that off my chest.
Right, I'm off for a deep fried mars bar ready for the little one's lunch - don't worry, I'll make it healthy - she'll get Diet Irn bru with it
RANT ALERT
this weekend past was supposed to lovely. It was hubby's folks' Ruby Wedding Anniversary. They planned to take us (hubby and I, his 2 brothers and sil) to dinner and we were surprising them with a stretch limo to take them there (might I add at this point that "I" thought of it, planned and booked it, if it was up to all of them, nothing special would have been done).
So, we all turn up and mil's face is a picture when limo appears. We have a lovely journey, some champers and sil announces she's preggers. Excellent thought hubby and I, we can't get hit with the old "you're taking away our only grandchildren" chestnut anymore. Plus we were delighted for them too.
Lovely meal, but every time Oz gets mentioned you'd think we'd just told an obscenely dirty joke or something - looks could kill!!
Next day, hubby's out of site fixing the PC upstairs and they pounced on me - literally.
Geez, I got an hour of "you've no idea what you're doing, fil can't travel that far at his age, I would never do that to my family if I loved them, we've no right going without going on holiday first to check it out, we've no right to deny our children their heritage blah blah blah
AARRRHGGGHHHHH
I was absolutely fuming mad. So much so I've even told hubby that I'm not going back up there again unless he's with me. I am not under any circumstances going to sit and defend my decision to them any more. They are not going to change our minds so they are just going to have to learn to live with it, and the more they turn on the guilt trips, the further away they're pushing us. When we see them next we are going to tell them that we won't be mentioning moving again. If they want to ask us or add something constructive or positive then fine, but we don't want to hear another word. And if I ever find out that they've said anything negative to the girls then heaven help them
I really can't tell you how angry I was. I'm a really really placid person, wouldn't say boo to a goose but this is just going to far. They wait until we're apart then pounce!
To make matters worse it was my sil who's usually one my side who was the worst (must be the hormones ). She actually sat there and said that they'd thought about doing it a few years ago but they just couldn't do that to their families and they think we're wrong and very selfish and probably won't even be able to stay the distance anyway and will come back with nothing - very nice!!!You know what they can all go and F*** Off. Hubby and I are doing this for OUR family, for an adventure, for hopefully a better way of life and to open our eyes to the fact that there's more to life than this!! The world's a huge place, we just want to experience it, not just let it slip by living somewhere we hate. We want our kids to grow up in a multicultural society and appreciate and embrace different lifetyles and cultures. We want to live somewhere where we can get outside and not freeze, we want our kids to have a healthier lifestyle and none of that will happen here.
If you're still with me - well done. I just needed to get that off my chest.
Right, I'm off for a deep fried mars bar ready for the little one's lunch - don't worry, I'll make it healthy - she'll get Diet Irn bru with it
What a bitch waiting until you were on your own, she obviously thought divided you fall, don't get intimidated by it, although having met you I don't think you would
Take care
Last edited by Margaret2; Feb 27th 2006 at 5:58 am.
Feb 27th 2006, 7:29 am
#36
Ok this isn't so bad
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Dundee (Scotland) now Bayside Brisbane
Posts: 4,824
Re: B****y In-Laws
You tell em!
We're all behind you.
Cheers
Ginny
We're all behind you.
Cheers
Ginny
Feb 27th 2006, 8:35 am
#37
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by herrchook
Thanks for all the support everyone, it means a lot.
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
I'm feeling naughty now. Think I'll go get a photo of somewhere in Aus and doctor it to add the 4 of us sticking the finger up and email to everyone in my husband's family
Feb 27th 2006, 8:55 am
#38
Just Joined
Joined: Feb 2006
Location: JHB, South Africa
Posts: 18
Poor you - they sound like right pains in the ****
My parents have been the exact opposite - so much so that they're making me feel guilty. Especially as my brother emmigrated to New Zealand last year and my Gran died a couple of months ago leaving them with no family at all in the UK.
They keep saying - they really want me to be happy, support me all the way, looking forward to coming to visit me etc.. etc.. By having this attitude I'm now really keen for them to get a holiday home or even move out permanently with me if they want to.
It's a shame as when you do go, you won't be in a rush for them to come and visit of you think they are only going to pick holes in in your new life.
My parents have been the exact opposite - so much so that they're making me feel guilty. Especially as my brother emmigrated to New Zealand last year and my Gran died a couple of months ago leaving them with no family at all in the UK.
They keep saying - they really want me to be happy, support me all the way, looking forward to coming to visit me etc.. etc.. By having this attitude I'm now really keen for them to get a holiday home or even move out permanently with me if they want to.
It's a shame as when you do go, you won't be in a rush for them to come and visit of you think they are only going to pick holes in in your new life.
Feb 27th 2006, 9:28 am
#39
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 7,834
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by herrchook
So true - it's just turned my into a petulent little child who's now digging her heels in even further
I'm going to scream and scream until I'm sick
I'm going to scream and scream until I'm sick
dont u mean SCWEEEM AND SCWEEEM UNTIL UR THICK
I tell ye if my inlaws had done that to me I would have just stood up told them all to ***** off, and that they wouldnt be comin to stay then when u r in your lovely new home ...........me thinks SIL is just jealous cos she didnt have the balls to do it herself.
As you said as long as YOUR (you hubby and kiddies)family are all happy then go for it!!!!!!
Dont let the bastards grind ya down
Feb 27th 2006, 9:55 am
#40
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by biggy
Dont let the bastards grind ya down
Feb 27th 2006, 10:02 am
#41
Australia's Doorman
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: The Shoalhaven, New South Wales, Australia
Posts: 11,056
Re: B****y In-Laws
Originally Posted by moneypen20
Oi! That's my line. Bog off and get your own
Feb 27th 2006, 10:24 am
#42
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: in a place near the river and the sea where the sun always shines
Posts: 3,155
Re: B****y In-Laws
herrchook lovey, sorry to hear what a crap time they gave you. good for you though! stick to your guns and dont let them blackmail you, you're doing it for you and yours and thats what matters!!!!!
good luck hun xxx
you still going to glasgow? we're going the saturday
good luck hun xxx
you still going to glasgow? we're going the saturday
