neal brown

Hello i was born in Barbados live in Kent & London for 10 years travel six times a year in and out of Barbados if have lots of friends that are British expat and are friend with some of the wealthiest people in England.I join this forum to give an unbias idea or opinion if there are any rules stating that only expat allowed i will withdraw with immediate effect.It is good to discuss a lot of other issues instead of the same old questions over and over no need to get angry if you dont like the topic do like me shut up and ignore it.I have seen many bias comments on Trip Advisor like sewage in the sea next to Discovery & Mango Bay hotels, people are advising travelers to stay away from these hotels,which is very bad because sewage never goes into the sea at these places.

shines

Your posts do seem do go off on very odd tangents...

What does being friends with wealthy people have to do with anything?

As for sewage, I think you will find that there is NO sewage system in Barbados along the West Coast, where do you think it ends up...?

Now to public floggings, do you think it is better done behind closed doors? I think if it is going to happen then I would rather the person doing it felt they could do so in the open, who knows what happens behind closed doors? I am sure the 14yr old in Guyana who was tortured by the police would have preferred not to be behind a closed door...?

I think the views on corporal punishment are personal, clearly, but if we look back at what used to exist and compare it to what exists now that children have no disicpline then it kind of speaks for itself. In the main corporal punishment acts as a very good deterrent.

These days, especially in the UK, the children have no deterrent for bad behaviour and know all the rights belong to them, and the very sad part of this is that the children who are being abused are still being abused as these are the "behind closed doors" type of people who will always flout the laws...

*steps off her soapbox*

Lindi2

Hi everyone,

I think Neal has a point.

Where are the parents when the kids are out on the streets causing trouble? I'm a firm believer in 'nurturing', and if you teach them right from wrong from the start, give them boundaries and love them, the majority will grow up to be decent human beings. Unfortunately some parents don't do this. If I could have a £ for every time I have been in the supermarket or out shopping and I hear a mother swearing at her young kids (and I mean swearing!!). The kids think this is the 'norm' and so it starts.

I think it is a personal decision for parents as to whether they smack their kids when they are naughty, but I would never allow anyone else to physically dicipline my daughter. As for public beatings. I think it is barbaric!! Why would anyone want to hang around and watch a child being beaten sensless by an adult? I certainly wouldn't.

I do however agree that society needs to do something with these thugs that cause misery to law abiding citizens. I don't have the answers I'm afraid but I really don't think the answer is public beatings.

***** Off the soapbox also ********

neal brown

Thank you Lindi2 you seem to be the only person here with some common sense and sticking to the point,it always make me feel good when a person can speak their mind and express their feelings, and not just talk to please others although they know what their are saying is wrong, it shows that you have a mind of your own,we dont just need to talk about migrating to Barbados but anything that can be díscussed,once again thank you for sharing your views on public beating Lindi2 your views was well appreciated 110%.

pgtips

Lindi2, I do not think these children are bbeaten senseless by anyone.
The unruley ones more than likely just get the cane like we used to have in the UK, but for all to see.

Hopefully the embarressment of this will help stem the errors of their ways.

Ikon

While I don't think Neal always expresses his point very well, at its heart he's basically saying Barbados schools etc shouldn't need to employ corporal punishment to discipline children.

I'm very surprised in 2009 that people would disagree with him!

I can only assume perhaps there are a number of older users posting here who experienced corporal punishment during their own schooling. In most modern countries, this simply isn't acceptable anymore, full stop. And it's time that Barbados caught up to that, in my opinion.

I say that as somebody who lives in Barbados full-time, and puts children through the education system; not an outsider trying to instill Western views and values.

bamiskados

There seems to be contradiction in your stories, you say you are born in Barbados and then appear very surprised at disciplinairy punishment at the schools here which you call ´public beatings`. My children went to school here and i would not addres it like that. Apart from the fact of agreeing or not.

I get the strong impression you throw topics on this forum for the simple purpose of starting a discussion to stir things up. Do you have a lack of action in your daily life?

P4TTY06

I agree totally...

Did my very best to stay out of this debate but in the end thought to share my point of view...
I wouldnt necessary put the behavior of unruly out of hand children of this generation down to lack of corporal punishment.. i bet you will find the majority come from, unloving homes, broken homes, abusive homes, unstable homes, neglecting parents, aggressive parents, uncaring parents, drug or alcohol abusing parents.. I believe no amount of whip lash can sort out a child that is unfortunate enough to come from any such home. if anything, will it not make it worse.

pgtip says "Hopefully the embarrassment of this will help stem the errors of their ways" Why the need to do this.. beat a child with a gathered audience to embarrass them... hell no, totally do not agree and would raise hell on this earth if anyone touched my child.

Each parent to their own and if they agree to have their child beaten in public.. good luck to them... but i strongly believe that parents shouldnt look to schools to sort their children out by ways of beating but reasonably discipline their own children, nurture and raise them to be respectful adults.

A true story, my neighbor that lives opposite me has a son, a single mother, respectful older lady, with a decent young boy. over the years however, right before my very eyes, i saw this boy turn from a good boy into a disrespectful, out of hand street boy, hanging out on street corners in gangs, involved in all sorts of nonsense. I dont know what goes on in their home but one thing i observe is that this woman is never at home as she works all hours God sends.. bless her, but leaving her boy (from aged 11/12) at home alone... he soon started sneaking out and just hanging with other street boys in the area (who im sure have their own stories) though im sure this woman didnt mean to neglect her child, but she did/does not give him the time he needs as a growing boy... hence he's free to do whatever he choose...

So my point is that we shouldnt be so quick to generalise and say the children of today are out of hand because they dont get corporal punishment. There are dozens of different reasons..

BUT point blank.. (and im gonna be bold and say this) i do believe if a child (and i only mean child up to 18.... and maybe a little beyond that) is out of control, its the parents fault... somehow, they messed up somewhere!!!

Ikon

I wholeheartedly agree P4TTY06. Children need a lot of (the right kind of) attention, and as parents sometimes these days we are just too busy to give it to them.

I think it's about giving lots of praise when things go right, coupled with VERY CLEAR boundaries and reasonable expectations, but my philosophy for parenting probably belongs in a different thread (LOL!).

Living in Barbados, one does have to make one's own mind up on corporal punishment when approaching education for your child, and choosing a school where you're 100% comfortable with what they will & won't do.

Lindi2

Hi Ikon, I totally agree with what you've said. I would however like make one small point.

I don't live in Barbados but my ties with the country are very strong - I am part of a British Barbadian family who hopes one day to be lucky enough to live there. I know my opinion is not going to change the policies of the Barbados Education system, only yours can do that through the vote.

However I do feel that 'outsiders' views and opinions are just as relevant and can often add to a lively discussion.

pgtips

Really !! Do you think corporal punishment is only western values ?
How long have you lived in the Caribbean ?
Most Caribbean families and countries employ some form of capital punishment, why? because it works !!!
Nobody could have loved their children more than my parents, and they were always around to guide and nurture us children. Punishment was always in the form of telling off, talking, or having privilages taken away. Spanking was a last resort.
As you say you are a full time Caribbean resident you should know this long time caribbean saying "If you can't hear you must feel"

Are the bajan kids unruly ?
Are the bajan kids binge drinking ?
Are the bajan Kids experimenting with drugs ?
having under ade sex ?
having no respect for their elders ?
Do they have no respect for themselves ?
Killing each other senselessly ?

So maybe, just maybe, the bajan authorities know what they are doing and we should but our noses out of their business.

pgtips

Yeh, everbody thinks their child is an angel !!!
"No not my child, my child would not do this that or the other"

That child if not disciplined properley can quickly turn from your little angel to your unruly devil

P4TTY06

Right ok i get it, the the only way to discipline a child "properly" is to have them beaten in front of an audience....

My bad, totally missed that one... and for those that are not aware of this, i'll be sure to pass on these wise words... we dont want our little Angels turning into devils now do we...?

Ikon

Sorry pgtips, if you don't think Bajan kids are experimenting with drugs, practising promiscuity, and binge-drinking, then you're living on a different island.

Pay a visit to any nightclub on Saturday evening and tell me the same thing.

Anyone who solves ANY problem with physical means (whether the punishment of a child or a dispute with an adult) is simply using physical superiority to get their own way, because they lack the intelligence to do so any other way.

Mitzyboy

It's not so long ago in overall terms that this kind of discipline was dished out in the UK though in the 60's and running into the 70's Canes and slippers were used by teachers right in the front of the class. It was a humiliating thing to have to go through, but made everyone a lot more careful about breaking the rules and doing wrong. In time that care turned into habit, and in the village we lived in probably the most serious misdemeanour was scrumping apples!

OK I'm not advocating public beatings by any means, times have changed, and of course many other things have changed since then that also have had an effect on the kids upbringing nowadays ....... but the cane and slipper actually worked back in the day.