Britinsac

Way back in 2017 we made the decision to come back to the UK, primarily because my wife's parents were diagnosed with Alzheimers and she wanted to be able to spend more time with them but also to help her sisters share the burden. It was never our intention to return to the UK. We had a good life in Northern California, ran a successful business, our children were settled in San Francisco and Los Angeles, and we had every intention of making our way down to San Diego eventually. However we decided that we could always return to the U.S in the future when and if it felt right and that time is now upon us.
Being back in the UK has been mixed for us. We bought a beautiful Victorian B&B on the Isle of Wight, and I can honestly say that running it for the first few years was just really a wonderful experience. Unfortunately it was not to last for us. The dreaded COVID came along and with it a huge financial strain from being closed for pretty much a whole season and then some. During that time also my health took a turn for the worse and I had the misfortune to suffer almost 3 years of pain and misery due to the fact that it was impossible to get the care I needed while the hospitals and GPs shut their doors and denied the care so many people needed. As a result we had no choice but to sell our B&B for I was simply to ill to continue working and my wife was unable to run an 8 bed guest house all on her own. I am sure that many of you know how hard it has been to get staff too - we just couldn't find anyone to help us. We sold the B&B in June2022 after discovering that my right kidney was now non functioning and in all likelihood would need to be removed.
By this time we had already decided that we wanted to go back to the U.S to be with our children, and our grandson who was born the month that the COVID frenzy and worldwide lockdowns began. It just wasn't tolerable for us to be forced to remain apart from our kids for over 2 years and we knew we didn't want to ever be put in that situation again. So my US citizen daughter filed I-130 parental sponsorships for us to start the process.
Last August my kidney was removed as an urgent case to avoid the risk of infections and possible sepsis. I have to say that my faith in the NHS has been really badly shaken. I do think it is partly due to the hospitals being run by different trusts. My care during the surgery for my kidney removal in Portsmouth was exemplary, but the care at another trust was definitely the cause of my 3 years of hell. I simply do not feel safe any more in this country as a person in their sixties who has some health issues. I never thought I would say this, but I would rather pay for healthcare and feel safer. The NHS is definitely not what it was when we left in 2003, and I fear it will continue to decline. That's my opinion, and I am sure there are those who have had far better care.
All of this has tainted our time here to a certain extent. We have absolutely loved the beaches, the genuine friendships we have made while here, and we will definitely miss the British way of life, the food and the tv. If COVID had not have hit we may not be feeling this way and might even want to stay. But one thing this whole thing has taught me, and that is you need to be where your family are. My kids and my grandson are my world, and it kills us everyday that we can't be with them. So we are now waiting for our approvals. Hopefully we will be successful and we can go back to the U.S to be where we now know we need to be. We know it won't be perfect, nowhere ever is for us expats (immigrants). It's the expat curse, you are never completely content, but you just have to settle where you get as close as possible to contentment as you can.

robin1234

Great post, thanks. I hope you’ve made a good recovery. I know what you mean about the kids - we bought a second home in England in 2015, to keep our options open, since we had one child settled in Massachusetts, and one in Cambridge (England.) Well, since then our son in England up and moved to Los Angeles..

Sounds like you might need a year or two more in the US system to qualify for Medicare, or do you have ten years in already?

calman014

Dear Britinsac,

I am an Islander born and bred. I sympathize with your situation completely because I understand the complete mess in the UK in general, and specifically the Isle of Wight which has been allowed to (for the want of a better expression) FESTER for years. I have family there and also in-laws. The current government has no interest in the people or the levels of abject poverty there except to use them as Covid guinea pigs and other equally stupid experiments. Also they also sneakily plonked Karadzic there in Parkhurst prison I gather.
The Island is a beautiful place, IF you are lucky enough to be able to make a living there or have a decent source of income.

30 years ago there was no decent holiday accommodation and trying to find somewhere to eat was impossible unless you just wanted a packet of crisps and a pickled onion.
There has been some great investment on the Island and once very tatty hotels, B&B's and pubs have reached good standards, so in general the visitor is well catered for, except for the exorbitant ferry costs of course.

So sorry to hear about your business and the health issues. By the way where was your business located?

When it comes to health care..well what can you say. I lost my Mother and Mother-in-Law in the last 2 years purely due to serious healthcare failings on the Island.

I would never recommend to anyone to live there on a permanent basis..the risk is just too great especially for the over 50's and there is little hope of improvement under the current situation.

Get out while you can and go enjoy your family and Grandchildren. Life is too short.


My neck of the woods...

Britinsac

We have about 15 years of Social security and medicare credits each, so we should be good.!

Britinsac

Thank you so much for your well wishes. We had a B&B in Shanklin, pm me if you want to know which one. Yes I am sad for the island, many areas are suffering from lack of investment. Many people come here to retire and then find that the healthcare is simply not up to scratch. Fortunately I did survive it but it was more by luck than judgement, coupled with a lot of shouting by my wife! We will always have affection for the island, however it is not a place I want to spend the rest of my days without my family around me. We love Freshwater!

calman014

Shanklin one of our favorites also, especially since the seafront has been revamped. Great Fish and Chip place too. We had previously stayed in a place up on the top close to the gardens. More recently we rented a nice cottage in Newchurch for our visits to family. Such a shame as the Island has so much potential. Besides health, other big issues are of course transport links and other stuff like postal services which are really a form of discrimination. Current MP more interested in wasting funds on the useless railway and other vanity projects instead of tackling long term problems that have been there for years. Second home owners paying no council taxes one reason for funding problems for locals..it needs a complete rethink. Not that “leveling up” will help!

calman014

Oh..just seen this...says it all really doesn't it!

Piff Poff

Glad you are on the mend. I don't know why you needed your kidney removed but if you are likely to require dialysis in the future, please look into the costs of that. The things I read on the kidney sites for the US are quite horrifying

Britinsac

It's been a nice place to live for 5 years, but I couldn't see myself retiring here!

Britinsac

It's all a gamble to be honest - life that is! If I had been in the States I think it is unlikely I would have lost my kidney, but who knows? Thank you for the advice I will certainly look into that, :-)

Moses2013

Sorry to hear this, I would say that this can happen anywhere now though and even the best public healthcare system on paper is worth nothing these days. I've heard similar horror stories in Jersey (also smaller island) regarding lack of investment too. People complain in the UK, here in Ireland and even Germany where I also have family and even in Spain healthcare workers dropped out due to Covid and being burnt out. In Europe I would always recommend private health insurance to avoid waiting times (if you can afford it) but even that doesn't guarantee good treatment these days. Unfortunately it will only get worse with more people in the future.

Piff Poff

Apparently according to my recent learnings the North American diet is terribly hard on kidneys, with all the extra additives that just are not allowed in Europe. There is a couple of very active FB pages on kidney disease, it's worth looking at. We're still in Canada and even then, care through the different Provinces can vary wildly.

Britinsac

All I need is the kidney I have left to last another 25 years lol

scrubbedexpat132

Hi @Britinsac, I'm so sorry to hear about the troubles you've gone through. Reading that you feel you lost your kidney due to another trust here in the UK is terrifying. I feel I'm a whole lot younger than many other members here browsing through posts, but I can absolutely agree that the NHS has gone right down the swanny since early 2000s. I wish you all the best and hope you can return to your family soon. From what I've heard from US friends, their healthcare is expensive, but you get what you pay for.

I have Costochondritis which simulates heart attacks, and was hit so severely last year that I left work and went to hospital. I was there for five and a half hours before I was seen to. If it had really been my heart like I thought it was, I'd have been long gone. I feel the Tories have run Britain into the ground, in my opinion.

calman014

Unfortunately that's not so much an opinion as a fact. Whatever the current bunch are doing, their first priority seems to be how to sneakily monetize it and scoop in millions of public money to fatten up the (mostly it seems) offshore held accounts. Recent events with Mone and Zarhawi have been a classic example of this. Combined with the number of Non-Doms in the house of Lords and other tax evasion scams lets you see where all the money is really going, down the preverbial drain.