You know its Summer in WA when?
Feb 12th 2003, 12:02 am
#1
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Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Perth Arse end of the planet
Posts: 7,037
You know its Summer in WA when?
Subject: You know it's Summer in Western Australia when...
You know it's Summer in Western Australia when...
The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 35C and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that in February it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 6:00a.m.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up
lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
You realise that asphalt has a liquid state.
The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt, and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk.
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
Your best friends in summer just happen to have air conditioning or a pool
You remind yourself for the ninth year in a row to buy a new car that has airconditioning.
You sleep more often in your back yard than you do in your house.
You think living in England can't be that bad.
Now isn't that the truth?
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You know it's Summer in Western Australia when...
The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 35C and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that in February it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 6:00a.m.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up
lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
You realise that asphalt has a liquid state.
The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt, and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk.
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
Your best friends in summer just happen to have air conditioning or a pool
You remind yourself for the ninth year in a row to buy a new car that has airconditioning.
You sleep more often in your back yard than you do in your house.
You think living in England can't be that bad.
Now isn't that the truth?
__________________________________________________ __
IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here
Feb 12th 2003, 10:40 am
#2
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Apr 2002
Location: Sydney
Posts: 336
Laughing my head off PB, well done, says it all!!!
Mandy
Mandy
Feb 12th 2003, 11:18 am
#3
Checkin' the world out.
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 113
Superb PB !
You know it's summer in England when..
For the fifth weekend in a row the cricket is rained off.
Kent is flooded.
Edinburgh Woollen Mill announce record sales.
On any given week day with more than 2 forecast hours of sun, work absences hit 70%.
No-one in London speaks English. No-one.
On a friday night it takes 7 hours to get to Bristol...from Worcester.
The village post offices in the south west OPEN...they're closed for 10 months of the year because all the 'locals' actually live in London.
Wales is suddenly a good idea.
The sound from the sky is deafening...here come the chopper coppers. Bugger crime, it's chasing speeders time !
It's a 4 hour check-in at Heathrow.
Blackpool ain't all THAT bad. Well, it could be worse. Like in winter.
The trains all stop because of 'environmental hazards beyond our control'. Yep, in summer.
The flowers die. They all came out in Feb thinking it was summer, only to be lashed by 4 months of april showers and storms.
There's nothing on TV.
Everyone in Tenerife is called Wayne. Or Shaz.
All the expats go back early, disgusted by the weather and the dreary looks on everyone's faces, wittering comments like 'it was never this depressing, surely? All are friends are SO miserable..' etc. etc.
Brighton pier burns down. Again.
There's a hosepipe ban. After 3 weeks of torrential rain.
Spain runs out of sausages, eggs, bacon, beans..and beer.
All the celebs VANISH. Summer in England ? That just isn't done.
The hospitals can't cope with any more cases of post holiday teen VD.
BBQs triple in price.
Homebase is THE most happening place on earth.
Neighbours emerge from their houses to re-acquaint themselves. 'Now, I haven't seen you in daylight since...'
For the fifth weekend in a row the cricket is rained off.
Kent is flooded.
Edinburgh Woollen Mill announce record sales.
On any given week day with more than 2 forecast hours of sun, work absences hit 70%.
No-one in London speaks English. No-one.
On a friday night it takes 7 hours to get to Bristol...from Worcester.
The village post offices in the south west OPEN...they're closed for 10 months of the year because all the 'locals' actually live in London.
Wales is suddenly a good idea.
The sound from the sky is deafening...here come the chopper coppers. Bugger crime, it's chasing speeders time !
It's a 4 hour check-in at Heathrow.
Blackpool ain't all THAT bad. Well, it could be worse. Like in winter.
The trains all stop because of 'environmental hazards beyond our control'. Yep, in summer.
The flowers die. They all came out in Feb thinking it was summer, only to be lashed by 4 months of april showers and storms.
There's nothing on TV.
Everyone in Tenerife is called Wayne. Or Shaz.
All the expats go back early, disgusted by the weather and the dreary looks on everyone's faces, wittering comments like 'it was never this depressing, surely? All are friends are SO miserable..' etc. etc.
Brighton pier burns down. Again.
There's a hosepipe ban. After 3 weeks of torrential rain.
Spain runs out of sausages, eggs, bacon, beans..and beer.
All the celebs VANISH. Summer in England ? That just isn't done.
The hospitals can't cope with any more cases of post holiday teen VD.
BBQs triple in price.
Homebase is THE most happening place on earth.
Neighbours emerge from their houses to re-acquaint themselves. 'Now, I haven't seen you in daylight since...'
Feb 12th 2003, 10:40 pm
#4
Banned
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Perth Arse end of the planet
Posts: 7,037
Re: Superb PB !
Originally posted by nixstuff
You know it's summer in England when..
Neighbours emerge from their houses to re-acquaint themselves. 'Now, I haven't seen you in daylight since...'
You know it's summer in England when..
Neighbours emerge from their houses to re-acquaint themselves. 'Now, I haven't seen you in daylight since...'
Last edited by pommie bastard; Feb 13th 2003 at 2:39 am.
Feb 13th 2003, 3:14 am
#5
Just Joined
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 13
You know it's winter in the UK when
everybody starts thinking about emigrating
everybody starts thinking about emigrating
Feb 13th 2003, 3:27 am
#6
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Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Perth Arse end of the planet
Posts: 7,037
Originally posted by Britannia
You know it's winter in the UK when
everybody starts thinking about emigrating
You know it's winter in the UK when
everybody starts thinking about emigrating
