Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Dec 20th 2003, 2:27 am
#1
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 1,621
Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
“I am Wilf, only Wilf�
“Left one, cough, right one, cough. And that's just in the waiting room�.
“I am older than anyone else on the site I think. Take the average IQ of someone who wants to emigrate to OZ, double it and add 30. Then you have it�.
“I could be dead tomorrow. Or, even worse, still alive in Oz�.
“Notice the word expats? Are you ex? No. You are a pat�.
“State school was it? A right state�.
“Get some pom poms and popsocks, but keep off the playing field until a goal is scored�.
“You write like a crossword clue. You are two down�.
“You are like a copper only they serve a useful purpose catching druggies and burglars. You just catch flies�.
“The only way to double your money in OZ is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket�.
“For me it is too late, save yourself�.
“Have you got the top of your skull open on the hinge and they can smell your brain�?
“Let's put that incident with you and the glue sniffing all behind us and give it another go�.
“You didn't counsel Osama Bin Laden as a teenager looking for help did you�?
“Everything worthwhile is hard�.
“You sound like a bad soap actor son. Try Home and Away�.
“If I have to come up there and tuck you in, you'll regret it boy�.
“I will meet you at the bandstand at 6 o'clock. I will be carrying a copy of "Nasty Old Man Monthly" and wearing my best suit�.
“It is like your parliament only less swearing�.
“You can reach him on [email protected] or [email protected]�
“You're like a hypnotist in text�.
“Ban this, ban that. You'll be wanting to ban burglary and taking heroin next�.
“Mrs Wilf and I went to the zoo on the weekend and as we walked past a parrot's cage we said ‘hello’ and it hello'd back. Guess who that parrot reminds me of? Yes, for once you are right�.
“You'll wear her down in the end. Try giving her a recorded message on a tape recorder saying ‘You will like Oz’ and play it to her when she's asleep�.
“Do give Oz a go. Don't get a one way ticket.
Do move to a nice area. Don't forget a burglar alarm.
Do rent a nice house in Oz. Don't sell your house back home.
Do expect good facilities for teens. Don't be shocked when it's a race track outside your house.
Do believe the low crime figures. Don't ask your neighbours for the truth.
Do read this site. Don't expect me to cheer you up�.
“I am Wilf, only Wilf�
“Left one, cough, right one, cough. And that's just in the waiting room�.
“I am older than anyone else on the site I think. Take the average IQ of someone who wants to emigrate to OZ, double it and add 30. Then you have it�.
“I could be dead tomorrow. Or, even worse, still alive in Oz�.
“Notice the word expats? Are you ex? No. You are a pat�.
“State school was it? A right state�.
“Get some pom poms and popsocks, but keep off the playing field until a goal is scored�.
“You write like a crossword clue. You are two down�.
“You are like a copper only they serve a useful purpose catching druggies and burglars. You just catch flies�.
“The only way to double your money in OZ is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket�.
“For me it is too late, save yourself�.
“Have you got the top of your skull open on the hinge and they can smell your brain�?
“Let's put that incident with you and the glue sniffing all behind us and give it another go�.
“You didn't counsel Osama Bin Laden as a teenager looking for help did you�?
“Everything worthwhile is hard�.
“You sound like a bad soap actor son. Try Home and Away�.
“If I have to come up there and tuck you in, you'll regret it boy�.
“I will meet you at the bandstand at 6 o'clock. I will be carrying a copy of "Nasty Old Man Monthly" and wearing my best suit�.
“It is like your parliament only less swearing�.
“You can reach him on [email protected] or [email protected]�
“You're like a hypnotist in text�.
“Ban this, ban that. You'll be wanting to ban burglary and taking heroin next�.
“Mrs Wilf and I went to the zoo on the weekend and as we walked past a parrot's cage we said ‘hello’ and it hello'd back. Guess who that parrot reminds me of? Yes, for once you are right�.
“You'll wear her down in the end. Try giving her a recorded message on a tape recorder saying ‘You will like Oz’ and play it to her when she's asleep�.
“Do give Oz a go. Don't get a one way ticket.
Do move to a nice area. Don't forget a burglar alarm.
Do rent a nice house in Oz. Don't sell your house back home.
Do expect good facilities for teens. Don't be shocked when it's a race track outside your house.
Do believe the low crime figures. Don't ask your neighbours for the truth.
Do read this site. Don't expect me to cheer you up�.
Dec 21st 2003, 7:54 am
#2
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2003
Location: sunderland/victoria/now perth
Posts: 243
weirdo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dec 21st 2003, 10:15 am
#3
Guest
Posts: n/a
Originally posted by hutchy
weirdo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
weirdo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dec 22nd 2003, 2:54 am
#4
Y Ddraig Goch
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Body is in Brissie. Heart and soul has long flown home.
Posts: 3,722
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Florida_03
Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
“I am Wilf, only Wilf�
“Left one, cough, right one, cough. And that's just in the waiting room�.
“I am older than anyone else on the site I think. Take the average IQ of someone who wants to emigrate to OZ, double it and add 30. Then you have it�.
“I could be dead tomorrow. Or, even worse, still alive in Oz�.
“Notice the word expats? Are you ex? No. You are a pat�.
“State school was it? A right state�.
“Get some pom poms and popsocks, but keep off the playing field until a goal is scored�.
“You write like a crossword clue. You are two down�.
“You are like a copper only they serve a useful purpose catching druggies and burglars. You just catch flies�.
“The only way to double your money in OZ is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket�.
“For me it is too late, save yourself�.
“Have you got the top of your skull open on the hinge and they can smell your brain�?
“Let's put that incident with you and the glue sniffing all behind us and give it another go�.
“You didn't counsel Osama Bin Laden as a teenager looking for help did you�?
“Everything worthwhile is hard�.
“You sound like a bad soap actor son. Try Home and Away�.
“If I have to come up there and tuck you in, you'll regret it boy�.
“I will meet you at the bandstand at 6 o'clock. I will be carrying a copy of "Nasty Old Man Monthly" and wearing my best suit�.
“It is like your parliament only less swearing�.
“You can reach him on [email protected] or [email protected]�
“You're like a hypnotist in text�.
“Ban this, ban that. You'll be wanting to ban burglary and taking heroin next�.
“Mrs Wilf and I went to the zoo on the weekend and as we walked past a parrot's cage we said ‘hello’ and it hello'd back. Guess who that parrot reminds me of? Yes, for once you are right�.
“You'll wear her down in the end. Try giving her a recorded message on a tape recorder saying ‘You will like Oz’ and play it to her when she's asleep�.
“Do give Oz a go. Don't get a one way ticket.
Do move to a nice area. Don't forget a burglar alarm.
Do rent a nice house in Oz. Don't sell your house back home.
Do expect good facilities for teens. Don't be shocked when it's a race track outside your house.
Do believe the low crime figures. Don't ask your neighbours for the truth.
Do read this site. Don't expect me to cheer you up�.
Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
“I am Wilf, only Wilf�
“Left one, cough, right one, cough. And that's just in the waiting room�.
“I am older than anyone else on the site I think. Take the average IQ of someone who wants to emigrate to OZ, double it and add 30. Then you have it�.
“I could be dead tomorrow. Or, even worse, still alive in Oz�.
“Notice the word expats? Are you ex? No. You are a pat�.
“State school was it? A right state�.
“Get some pom poms and popsocks, but keep off the playing field until a goal is scored�.
“You write like a crossword clue. You are two down�.
“You are like a copper only they serve a useful purpose catching druggies and burglars. You just catch flies�.
“The only way to double your money in OZ is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket�.
“For me it is too late, save yourself�.
“Have you got the top of your skull open on the hinge and they can smell your brain�?
“Let's put that incident with you and the glue sniffing all behind us and give it another go�.
“You didn't counsel Osama Bin Laden as a teenager looking for help did you�?
“Everything worthwhile is hard�.
“You sound like a bad soap actor son. Try Home and Away�.
“If I have to come up there and tuck you in, you'll regret it boy�.
“I will meet you at the bandstand at 6 o'clock. I will be carrying a copy of "Nasty Old Man Monthly" and wearing my best suit�.
“It is like your parliament only less swearing�.
“You can reach him on [email protected] or [email protected]�
“You're like a hypnotist in text�.
“Ban this, ban that. You'll be wanting to ban burglary and taking heroin next�.
“Mrs Wilf and I went to the zoo on the weekend and as we walked past a parrot's cage we said ‘hello’ and it hello'd back. Guess who that parrot reminds me of? Yes, for once you are right�.
“You'll wear her down in the end. Try giving her a recorded message on a tape recorder saying ‘You will like Oz’ and play it to her when she's asleep�.
“Do give Oz a go. Don't get a one way ticket.
Do move to a nice area. Don't forget a burglar alarm.
Do rent a nice house in Oz. Don't sell your house back home.
Do expect good facilities for teens. Don't be shocked when it's a race track outside your house.
Do believe the low crime figures. Don't ask your neighbours for the truth.
Do read this site. Don't expect me to cheer you up�.
Are you still here? Or are you in florida?
I have a sneaky feeling "Wilf" has changed his name again - he is now an 18 yr old wanting go home in the "moving back to UK" forum ( correct me if I'm wrong)
or are you Mr Wilf ..lol
Anyway, Merry Christmas to you Florida and yours ( ouch that was painful to say)
cheers
Dec 22nd 2003, 3:01 am
#6
I like kittens.
Joined: Oct 2003
Location: In my own little world
Posts: 1,457
Originally posted by pleasancefamily
What was that one about the plops?
What was that one about the plops?
"If I want an opinion from something with an IQ like yours I'll wait until the next time I'm riding the porcelain moped, and when I hear a 'plop' I'll look down and say 'what do you reckon'?"
Must have enjoyed it if I can remember it practically verbatim!
Dec 22nd 2003, 3:47 am
#7
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Sep 2003
Location: Maroubra
Posts: 753
Don't recall seeing this guy on the board, but I feel I've missed something. He sounds great. He certainly appears to have a good array of put down lines.
Whats the problem with him?
Guys - I'm being serious.
Whats the problem with him?
Guys - I'm being serious.
Dec 22nd 2003, 3:55 am
#8
Y Ddraig Goch
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Body is in Brissie. Heart and soul has long flown home.
Posts: 3,722
Originally posted by RichS
Don't recall seeing this guy on the board, but I feel I've missed something. He sounds great. He certainly appears to have a good array of put down lines.
Whats the problem with him?
Guys - I'm being serious.
Don't recall seeing this guy on the board, but I feel I've missed something. He sounds great. He certainly appears to have a good array of put down lines.
Whats the problem with him?
Guys - I'm being serious.
sorry but the guy (or girl.. although he claimed to be a man) was funny and spoke his mind.
Cheers Wilf whoever, or where ever you are - here's one that misses reading some of your posts.
Dec 22nd 2003, 5:13 am
#9
Life's next chapter is?
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: NW England...for now.
Posts: 942
Originally posted by Ceri
He wasn't to everyone's taste - basically, he got herded out a few times by the " rose tinted glasses mob in Britain" . They didn't like what he said - so being the democracy society this board is ... witch hunt. he got fed up of being attacked and dwindled off into the mist.
sorry but the guy (or girl.. although he claimed to be a man) was funny and spoke his mind.
Cheers Wilf whoever, or where ever you are - here's one that misses reading some of your posts.
He wasn't to everyone's taste - basically, he got herded out a few times by the " rose tinted glasses mob in Britain" . They didn't like what he said - so being the democracy society this board is ... witch hunt. he got fed up of being attacked and dwindled off into the mist.
sorry but the guy (or girl.. although he claimed to be a man) was funny and spoke his mind.
Cheers Wilf whoever, or where ever you are - here's one that misses reading some of your posts.
I would love to go back to the UK of the 70's or 80's ... it was a much nicer place back then.
Rich.
Dec 22nd 2003, 12:19 pm
#10
Not here
Thread Starter
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 1,621
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Ceri
lol - that cheered me up
Are you still here? Or are you in florida?
I have a sneaky feeling "Wilf" has changed his name again - he is now an 18 yr old wanting go home in the "moving back to UK" forum ( correct me if I'm wrong)
or are you Mr Wilf ..lol
Anyway, Merry Christmas to you Florida and yours ( ouch that was painful to say)
cheers
lol - that cheered me up
Are you still here? Or are you in florida?
I have a sneaky feeling "Wilf" has changed his name again - he is now an 18 yr old wanting go home in the "moving back to UK" forum ( correct me if I'm wrong)
or are you Mr Wilf ..lol
Anyway, Merry Christmas to you Florida and yours ( ouch that was painful to say)
cheers
How's the 35 degree Christmas weather? I never have had a cold Christmas, guess I'll have to wait another year.
Happy Holidays Ceri, keep that Welsh fire burning.
Dec 22nd 2003, 7:09 pm
#11
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Ceri
I have a sneaky feeling "Wilf" has changed his name again - he is now an 18 yr old wanting go home in the "moving back to UK" forum ( correct me if I'm wrong)
cheers
I have a sneaky feeling "Wilf" has changed his name again - he is now an 18 yr old wanting go home in the "moving back to UK" forum ( correct me if I'm wrong)
cheers
wilko is too similar to wilf.
Badge
Dec 23rd 2003, 1:06 am
#12
Y Ddraig Goch
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Body is in Brissie. Heart and soul has long flown home.
Posts: 3,722
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Florida_03
Made it to Florida around 3 months ago but will be off to Maryland in the new year.
How's the 35 degree Christmas weather? I never have had a cold Christmas, guess I'll have to wait another year.
Happy Holidays Ceri, keep that Welsh fire burning.
Made it to Florida around 3 months ago but will be off to Maryland in the new year.
How's the 35 degree Christmas weather? I never have had a cold Christmas, guess I'll have to wait another year.
Happy Holidays Ceri, keep that Welsh fire burning.
And the same to you.
Is florida hot this time of year? I thought it was winter there - or is it like Brisbane's mild winters?
You could always try Britain for a cold christmas next year.... hopefully that's where I will be this time next year. Then I can have a good old whinge about the cold instead.
Merry Christmas
Dec 23rd 2003, 2:14 am
#13
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 1,621
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Ceri
And the same to you.
Is florida hot this time of year? I thought it was winter there - or is it like Brisbane's mild winters?
You could always try Britain for a cold christmas next year.... hopefully that's where I will be this time next year. Then I can have a good old whinge about the cold instead.
Merry Christmas
And the same to you.
Is florida hot this time of year? I thought it was winter there - or is it like Brisbane's mild winters?
You could always try Britain for a cold christmas next year.... hopefully that's where I will be this time next year. Then I can have a good old whinge about the cold instead.
Merry Christmas
I remember having friends over one Christmas in Brisbane and I had the hose hooked into the pergola spraying a mist to try and keep us cool. Another year we went with friends to Double Island Point. I spent the next day spewing from heat stroke. All that fake snow, Sleigh Bells, hot lunch, while frying your brain.
Dec 23rd 2003, 2:54 am
#14
Y Ddraig Goch
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Body is in Brissie. Heart and soul has long flown home.
Posts: 3,722
Re: Wilf Remembered if not Recalled Part 1
Originally posted by Florida_03
It is Winter here but we expect around 24 C tomorrow, with mins around 12 C. there is another coldfront from the North on its way so it will get a bit cooler. I was in Southern Maryland 2 weeks ago and there was a foot of snow on the ground (but don't tell my wife that). "Yes dear...no dear...you must be thinking of Northern Maryland...they have mild Winters in Southern Maryland..."
I remember having friends over one Christmas in Brisbane and I had the hose hooked into the pergola spraying a mist to try and keep us cool. Another year we went with friends to Double Island Point. I spent the next day spewing from heat stroke. All that fake snow, Sleigh Bells, hot lunch, while frying your brain.
It is Winter here but we expect around 24 C tomorrow, with mins around 12 C. there is another coldfront from the North on its way so it will get a bit cooler. I was in Southern Maryland 2 weeks ago and there was a foot of snow on the ground (but don't tell my wife that). "Yes dear...no dear...you must be thinking of Northern Maryland...they have mild Winters in Southern Maryland..."
I remember having friends over one Christmas in Brisbane and I had the hose hooked into the pergola spraying a mist to try and keep us cool. Another year we went with friends to Double Island Point. I spent the next day spewing from heat stroke. All that fake snow, Sleigh Bells, hot lunch, while frying your brain.
Ahh snow .. I can't remember the last time I saw snow , Sounds wonderful.
I think the temp is around 32, maybe 34c as I write this... so you're lucky to have a cold 24c!
I'm thinking of filling our wheelie bin up with water, voila - one "on patio spa/pool" the neighbours will be so envious ( I Haven't got a pool yet). May try your hose trick too.
We're having a bit of heatwave at the moment, although it hasn't reached 40 like did a few years back.
Hubby was over at Ipswich doing a site job yesterday (for people who are heading to Ipswich - there is a reason why the place is cheap) , he came back to the office looking as if someone had chucked a bucket of water over him, he was soaking. It's all very well this weather, but try working in it without any aircon.
It's not that I mind the heat, but I absolutely hate it at Christmas, it never feels right to me. The prospect of going to the beach doesn't fill me with joy either - too many people and the usual christmas holiday makers around
cheers
