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Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

Old Oct 18th 2002, 10:16 am
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Default Too Many Arguments read this.

Having followed this Forum for a while and having several immigrant friends I have noticed people seem to go through some very common stages.

1. Anticipation - while waiting for visas. Lots of idealistic thoughts, dreaming about the new country, hard to believe anything can be wrong there.

2. Trepidation - Visas due or received, some concerns now about missing family, finding jobs, leaving home and friends.

3. Holiday mode, arrived and its all new and exciting, novelty of the new life overwhelming and fun.

4. Reality, Need a job, finding things becoming more down to earth, day to day niggles set in.

5. Disillusion, Suddenly you are the one far away, missing family and contacts, shoe on other foot with currency/ earnings, basic reality that life is not perfect in New Country either.

6 Acceptance or Rejection, the dream Country is now a reality with all of lifes day to day routines or hassles. People now weigh up if its for them on the realistic day to day life not the dream they once had.


Perhaps the above stages, explain why so many like Pommie, Ceri, myself Herman and many others (Stage 6), have very different opinions, from the many here in (Stage 1). Its simple, people are looking at it from very different angles, no doubt all of us were once in Stage one or we would not be here. What do you think?

Last edited by dotty; Oct 18th 2002 at 8:48 pm.
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Old Oct 18th 2002, 10:29 am
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Default Re: Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

Hi Dotty,
Good entry.
1. Anticipation - couldn't wait for those visas to arrive.
2. Trepidation - OMG, am I doing the right thing.
3. Holiday mode - well i've never been yet so cant comment.
4. Disillusion - can only 'imagine' what thats like hence the doubts.
5. Acceptance or Rejection - really dont care one way or t'other. My kids happiness is most important and if I dont 'connect' with anyone well its their loss cos we are really easy going and get on with most people.

At the moment I'm at stage 2.
Any room at you inn Dotty?
love Shona xx
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Old Oct 18th 2002, 10:31 am
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Default Re: Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

oops Dotty, just noticed you've got two number 4's.
4. Reality - need a job - I'm an RGN and have no quams re jobs - plenty work out there for us nurses.
Shona x
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Old Oct 18th 2002, 10:44 am
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Default Re: Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

Originally posted by micky:
oops Dotty, just noticed you've got two number 4's.
4. Reality - need a job - I'm an RGN and have no quams re jobs - plenty work out there for us nurses.
Shona x
Sorry about the double 4's, must be the bottle of red we had with dinner.
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Old Oct 18th 2002, 1:31 pm
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Default Re: Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

I'll be really surprised if there are no more entries cos I thot this was a GOOD thread.
And I would be very surprised if no-one else agrees!
Now that the visas are here its a different story - am I being realistic?
Leaving family/close,close friends?
At the end of the day, whats more important? Bigger house, sunnier weather, better lifestyle for the kids?
Infact, on hindsight, I love Scottish weather, 4 seasons etc.
Snow, the occasional summer!! Autumn, and spring.

I'm not trying to talk my way out of any decisions, but once those visas are in your hands, you DO start to wonder.
Shona x
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Old Oct 18th 2002, 8:51 pm
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Default Re: Is this why there are too many arguments on this Site?r

I have just corrected my numerical errors, hope it makes reading easier.
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Old Oct 19th 2002, 3:00 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Up to stage 4 at the moment seemed to have missed out on stage 3 as I had a job within 2 weeks *sigh* but then I did not expect my feet to touch the ground for a long while. Still waiting for stage 5 to creep in.... let ya know if/when it does

Yvonne

Originally posted by dotty:
Having followed this Forum for a while and having several immigrant friends I have noticed people seem to go through some very common stages.

1. Anticipation - while waiting for visas. Lots of idealistic thoughts, dreaming about the new country, hard to believe anything can be wrong there.

2. Trepidation - Visas due or received, some concerns now about missing family, finding jobs, leaving home and friends.

3. Holiday mode, arrived and its all new and exciting, novelty of the new life overwhelming and fun.

4. Reality, Need a job, finding things becoming more down to earth, day to day niggles set in.

5. Disillusion, Suddenly you are the one far away, missing family and contacts, shoe on other foot with currency/ earnings, basic reality that life is not perfect in New Country either.

6 Acceptance or Rejection, the dream Country is now a reality with all of lifes day to day routines or hassles. People now weigh up if its for them on the realistic day to day life not the dream they once had.


Perhaps the above stages, explain why so many like Pommie, Ceri, myself Herman and many others (Stage 6), have very different opinions, from the many here in (Stage 1). Its simple, people are looking at it from very different angles, no doubt all of us were once in Stage one or we would not be here. What do you think?
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Old Oct 19th 2002, 1:46 pm
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Originally posted by ywoods:
Up to stage 4 at the moment seemed to have missed out on stage 3 as I had a job within 2 weeks *sigh* but then I did not expect my feet to touch the ground for a long while. Still waiting for stage 5 to creep in.... let ya know if/when it does

Yvonne

Hi there,

Yvonne we were just wondering how you were getting on.

I'm inclined to agree with you Dotty. So much anticipation and like Shona, having never really be there don't know what to expect. I'll miss my mum like crazy (hubby not as much!) but that's something I'll deal with (somehow!). Both hubby and I are nurses so jobs shouldn't be too bad. As for the rest we'll just need to wait and see.

p.s. Dotty what's the weather like up you area in June. That's when we're coming over to validate.

Regards

Ginny
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Old Oct 20th 2002, 8:33 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Originally posted by Ginny:


Hi there,

Yvonne we were just wondering how you were getting on.

I'm inclined to agree with you Dotty. So much anticipation and like Shona, having never really be there don't know what to expect. I'll miss my mum like crazy (hubby not as much!) but that's something I'll deal with (somehow!). Both hubby and I are nurses so jobs shouldn't be too bad. As for the rest we'll just need to wait and see.

p.s. Dotty what's the weather like up you area in June. That's when we're coming over to validate.

Regards

Ginny

June is beautiful, the humidity goes between June - Sept and
in this period you will get very sunny clear days and cool nights. Probably 22 day and down to 8 at night.
It is spring now and humidity only 60%, but 32 already. Feeling a little sticky, it will probably cool down now next
May. Nov - March are the yukky bit terrible humidity and mid 30's usually. Days like last Xmas 44 degrees only for a few weeks tho.
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Old Oct 20th 2002, 10:20 pm
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Originally posted by dotty:
Having followed this Forum for a while and having several immigrant friends I have noticed people seem to go through some very common stages.

1. Anticipation - while waiting for visas. Lots of idealistic thoughts, dreaming about the new country, hard to believe anything can be wrong there.

2. Trepidation - Visas due or received, some concerns now about missing family, finding jobs, leaving home and friends.

3. Holiday mode, arrived and its all new and exciting, novelty of the new life overwhelming and fun.

4. Reality, Need a job, finding things becoming more down to earth, day to day niggles set in.

5. Disillusion, Suddenly you are the one far away, missing family and contacts, shoe on other foot with currency/ earnings, basic reality that life is not perfect in New Country either.

6 Acceptance or Rejection, the dream Country is now a reality with all of lifes day to day routines or hassles. People now weigh up if its for them on the realistic day to day life not the dream they once had.


Perhaps the above stages, explain why so many like Pommie, Ceri, myself Herman and many others (Stage 6), have very different opinions, from the many here in (Stage 1). Its simple, people are looking at it from very different angles, no doubt all of us were once in Stage one or we would not be here. What do you think?
This is brilliant and quite correct. I think it also applies in reverse Dotty. There are many at stage 1 on their way to Oz who think of Australia in idealistic terms, but equally there are many of us at stage 1 on our way back to the UK who think of the UK equal and opposite in idealistic terms. Therein lies the source of many a pointless and wasted argument.
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Old Oct 21st 2002, 4:38 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

[

Perhaps the above stages, explain why so many like Pommie, Ceri, myself Herman and many others (Stage 6), have very different opinions, from the many here in (Stage 1). Its simple, people are looking at it from very different angles, no doubt all of us were once in Stage one or we would not be here. What do you think? [/SIZE][/QUOTE]


Quiet right my dear lady I find it amusing how many on this site attack anyone who dares to put down Australia , yet are over joyed at with thosing rubbishing UK.Well better to dream than be here say some .
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Old Oct 21st 2002, 8:23 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

You know just for once on this forum I'd really love to hear from expats who have been in Oz for a while now and are really loving it!

Or maybe they are loving it too much that they don't have time to quote out of newspapers all the time!

Or maybe there are no happy people out there loving it ?
Perhaps they're like the negative posters on this forum then but don't want to spoil it for all us "dreamers"?

I tell myself that it'll only work out if you let it, you'll only make friends if you let yourself fit in.


Julie
Adelaide by early 2003
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Old Oct 21st 2002, 10:58 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Originally posted by Juls:
You know just for once on this forum I'd really love to hear from expats who have been in Oz for a while now and are really loving it!

Or maybe they are loving it too much that they don't have time to quote out of newspapers all the time!

Or maybe there are no happy people out there loving it ?
Perhaps they're like the negative posters on this forum then but don't want to spoil it for all us "dreamers"?

I tell myself that it'll only work out if you let it, you'll only make friends if you let yourself fit in.


Julie
Adelaide by early 2003
I've been in Australia for 5, almost 6 years, but everytime I say something against Australia on this forum.. I get attacked by people who have not even come here yet! Some people just don't want to hear the truth.

cheers
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Old Oct 21st 2002, 11:05 am
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Default Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

The thing is Ceri, we have all been waiting a very long time to achieve our 'dream' and the last thing we need is people like PB and others posting horrid, negative stuff on a daily basis. I am depressed enough as it is. I have phoned the HC this morning to hear my case is being retained by London yet i may not hear still for 2 months. I ended up in tears which is not very professional but i feel like shit.

That is why we may not aprecaite the negativity. It is not that we have anything against opinions but it's just not we want to hear. Sorry but that's just the way i feel.
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Old Oct 21st 2002, 12:37 pm
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Thumbs up Re: Too Many Arguments read this.

Just to say you hit the nail on the head, we have been in perth just over 3 months and every stage you quoted is me down to a tee.

once the kids went to kindy & school, hubby at work moved into house the reality hit me. no matter how much like paradise a place seems you still have to do the housework, washing shopping etc...

I do miss people a lot but you just remind yourself of why you come, be realistic and expect the downs as well as the ups and give it time. Seeing my kids playing outside nearly every waking hour is great.

god luck to all in the first stages I know how the wiat feels

Lynn
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