Chef69

Tell your children NOW. We told our children (16,10,4 )right from the start . At first the eldest did not want to go but now does. We have kept them up to date with all the aspects of this application. My 4 yr old told the grandparents the other day about the new house in Australia and how you get there on a plane and then a car. About how they were going to have a pool in the garden and swim with dolphins. We did not think that a child that young took in so much. Don't under-estimate your children, they adapt so easily to new situations. A lot better than we can.

mattmc

What if something goes wrong with the application process???

mattmc..."ever the pessimist"

sel

Our kids are 7 & 9 and we have been straight with them from the start. They keep chopping and changing their minds like the weather but this is usually through having little questions that always start with " don't want to go to Australia because of the .... spiders .... jelly fish .... etc" We answer them honestly and its always followed with the reply "ok .. yes still want to go ... and can I have a .... pool .... pet .... when we are there. We have bought them books etc to look at (hence all the questions).

I feel it gives them the time to adapt in lots of ways before they get there so its not such a culture shock ... kids, just like us adults, need to get their heads around stuff.

If we don't make it there then life goes on the same .... we have taken care to tell them that we have to pass alot of tests before the man/lady from Australia will say "YES".

Chef69

If something goes wrong with the application, then nothing changes.Life stays the same as it is now. But your willing to give it a shot.

sued

Hi Sus,

Great question. We have 3 kids(girl 15, boy 9, & girl 8 months). We're also planning on going to Oz in 2006. Obviously the 8 month old won't be too worried . We discussed everything with our 15yr old from the very start as we felt that as she will be 16 by the time we leave, the move will be a huge thing for her & if she was dead set against it then we would really need to rethink our plans. luckily she can't wait to go and is already planning her new life.
Our 9yr old is a different story. We haven't told him anything yet as we thought it is such a long way off and we don't want him to be fretting about leaving his grandparents,aunts,uncles etc until we know for certain that we have the visa. He is the type of child that lives for today(his bike, friends, ps2, what happening on the simpsons etc) so what we have done is brought home books about Oz, left the Oz programmes on the tv, got some holiday brochures to leave around the house, watched the Lions in the rugby and now he has the idea in his head that he wants to go to Australia next year for a long holiday. Don't get me wrong-we will tell him when we know when we're going but at the moment this info is on a need to know basis and a 9yr old does not need to spend months wondering why? what if? when? especially if something stopped us going :scared: . Like someone else said everyone knows their own child and how they will take such news so this is what we have decided for our son. You should go with your gut feeling and tell your children when you think the time is right .

Good Luck
Sue

hooperhome

We told our 3 girls aged 12, 7 and 4 right from the start and even took them to the initial consultation meeting with the agent. We made them feel included with the whole process and let them know that we valued their opinion and thoughts.

Luckily they were very enthusiastic about Australia. Took out books from the library, watched all the programmes on tv and we talk about it constantly. We have gone from 'if we go to Aus...' to 'when we get to Aus....'.

However if they had felt negative about it, we would have used whatever was required to get through that, even if it involved bribery. Dont' get me wrong I do value their opinions but at the end of the day we are the adults and we know better than them. There is no denying that.

As somebody else has said, you know your children better than anybody else, maybe test the water if you are unsure with some random comments and take it from there. Best of luck.

Theresa

biggy

then they will deal with it.....we just asked how did they fancy the idea bla bla......told them that it wasnt a definate thing as there were loads of things we had to sort out first....they were superb about the whole thing and after a year here have settled in brill!!!!

Kids r wonderful wee things

mattmc

Hi,

I know for definite that our two six year olds would not look forward to leaving their grandmother. We too have been mentioning autralia a lot around the kids lately so they are aware we want to go there someday, maybe for a long holiday. You are right, everyone knows there own children better than anybody else so good luck to you all when you think the time is right to spill the beans.

mattmc

Heathertoes

Hi

We are with the 'tell them now' brigade. Our children are 3 and 8 and can't wait to get out there. We told them as soon as we knew we were serious about this life changing choice. A trip to Oz at Easter helped things along - my 8 year old didn't want to go as he didn't speak Australian, now he nows he's fluent he has 'no worries mate!'.

Our 3 year talks about what can she take and hugged the kitchen cabinet yesterday saying she would miss the house....sniff and could we take the neighbour's dog with us?

I think being able to share with them the excitment and anticipation can only ease the changes ahead for everyone and at this age time means so little to them and their everyday life carries on its only us who think about it morning/noon and night!

But all said and done....we have to get the visa first!!!

Heather

hevs

We told ours right from the beginning and our process took nearly two years. It took over our ives and they would have soon cottoned on if we hadn't told them and then they would have felt excluded and would have wondered why .

My son hates change and he to asked heaps of questions, he has adapted really well and is even saying bloody parsta now

Latona

hi
we are at the beginning of the process(ready to send of TRA).
we told our 3 children right from the start, they were so excited, we took them over for a month, and now they just cant wait children are 12,9 and 4.
every two weeks i get"are we going yet", i guess Ive got a lot more of that to hear before we are ready to depart.

mattmc

Oh dear...looks like I am out numbered. I think I will go and eat humble pie to the wife and get ready to tell the kids :-)

mattmc

lynette

I've just found this web forum and I think it's great that I've at last found other people going through this minefield of 'shall I / Shan't I' questions. We moved from West Sussex to Berkshire when my son was 3 and my daughter was 1. My son had good friends/nursery and was a happy little boy in West Sussex. We kept it from my son till very close to the move date and it was the worst thing we could have done. We went through lots of traumas/tantrums etc. after the move. Even at the age of three he was well aware of what was going on. For the next year he would cry ' I want to go home' when he got upset.

Now we're moving to Oz and we've learnt our lessons - be completely open and involve them as soon as you know it's definitely going to happen. Our son is now 4 1/2 and he's excited. We've got a big kids map of Oz and we get it out regularly for chats. My 3 year old daughter has decided she wants a house with a pool and a pink nursery !!

Good luck,
Lynette.

fraser

When you're in Aus and they're in the UK with the babysitter

happym

hi j&s
we have planned to move to perth for the last year, ps going in three wks,told our 4 kids straight away [ages 18,16,6 and 3yrs]
the 18yr old has taken 11mths to get used to the idea the others were ok from the beginig.be honest if it does not appeal at least you can work on it and support your kids.kids are funny creatures and dont like change [like our 18yr old]we tried bribing with a new car and that seemed to work oh well what ever works in my book is ok