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Are We Crazy - Migration to Brisbane ?

Are We Crazy - Migration to Brisbane ?

Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:07 pm
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Hi All,

The family and I (wife and 10 year old son) just had a family meeting about the whole move as it seems that it's been getting on top of us. We are approx 4 months away from getting PR visas ( I hope ) and it's been a long haul (you all know what I mean )

My son always seems like a kid to me but just this evening he voiced his own opinions for the very first time and I had to choke back the feelings while I listened to him speak his mind.

He's really looking forward to going to Aus, but he already thinks that he will miss his friends and more importantly his family (e.g. Nan, etc.). It's not as if our family are that close, we only see them once per month at most but I guess that he feels more about more about this than I do, the young impressionable age I assume.

I spoke for about half an hour and said that we need to get over there and give it a go for 1 year and then make up our minds whether we want to stay or return back to the UK. We will essentially be on a 1 year probation period.

I also said that he should not worry and that we will try and mix as much as possible. I also mentioned this board and the fact that there are regular Brissy get togethers (thank you Mrs. D), and that we wil meet and make other friends in no time at all.

Has anyone else experienced the same heartache that I'm feeling at the moment and if so then please tell me that it gets easier . I just can't help feeling that 1 or 2 years down the line my son will be thanking me for doing this but it's really tugging at my heart strings at the moment.

Any encouragment would be most welcome
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:33 pm
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Hi Essexnobby,

bumping 'ya to the top.

This thread got me - am feeling a bit the same at the mo. Our two will be 6 and 4 when we go later this year and although we hope that one day they will thank us, it's hard to guesstimate whether it'll all work out ok or all go t*ts up, with them regretting the move, missing grandparents etc.

At the end of the day, you've come this far and you've got to give it a go, no-one ever changed anything by sitting still on their arses.

Personally, we're going for it, full pelt, with a bit of pioneer spirit thrown in for good measure and what will be, will be.

If anything, it will be an experience for your son to look back on in later years and give him the confidence to try new things, without being afraid of making the leap.
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:37 pm
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Having watched 'A new life down under' this all seems quite common. It must be tough in your situation, I'm going with my Aussie partner - she'll be alright back home but what I make of it is 100% up to me. But having to look out for a family must complicate things a great deal.

All I can suggest is that you encourage the positives as much as possible. There probably will be tough moments when all of you are homesick especially a child. Find out what he enjoys when he gets over there (e.g surfing) and encourage and support that as much as possible. Give it time, ride out the bumps and I'm sure all will be well. Just remember to always lend a sympathetic ear and be understanding!!

As far as I can see Australia is a fantastic place for children to grow up in.

Best of luck!

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Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:48 pm
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Default Re: Are We Crazy - Migration to Brisbane ?

Originally posted by EssexNobby
I also mentioned this board and the fact that there are regular Brissy get togethers (thank you Mrs. D), and that we wil meet and make other friends in no time at all.
Geeeeez, who said we were ever gonna invite you Nobby?

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(Its a J-O-K-E of course!! )
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:48 pm
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Hiya Nobby
I understand fully how you feel, and I am sure that most people on this forum who have made the move or are contemplating doing so will also understand.

Sometimes I get really sad, especially when I see my kids playing with their mates at birthday parties etc - it dawns on me that we wont be here for the next one.

In the past I have often wished that we never even thought about migrating or applied - wh did we rock the boat? However, after our validation trip I felt 100% more postive when I remembered why we wanted to go in the first place.

Anyway, it is not the end of the world if we don't like it we will come back - at least we will have tried it!!

Good Luck to you and your family Nobby.
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 8:56 pm
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Thanks, some good tips there. I know from taking my son to see his parents in Dubai that he's into jet-skiing and scuba diving so hopefully we'll get plenty of that in Brissy and the Gold Coast.

It just kinda eats me up inside when you hear these kind of doubts from someone so seemingly young (he's only 10 yrs old) :scared:

We are becoming more and more dependant on a kind of community spirit being in place when we get there.

All of the people who arange the Brissy get-togethers (Mrs. D and others - you know who you are) -I hope that you're still arranging these things when we're over ther at the end of this year ! . You're all doing a job that gets nowhere near enough thanks
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:02 pm
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Default Re: Are We Crazy - Migration to Brisbane ?

Just wanted to say ditto to all the above posts, but also add my two penith!
don't think of it as losing people here in the uk but think of it as making new one in Brisbane! We are taking our 11 year old daughter away from friends and a massive family, she has 14 cousins all of which she is very close to but we will always be there to listen to her fears and worries and to help her settle in, we are under no assumption that it is going to be easy for any of us but we are willing to give it 110% as a family. Do your parents have access to the internet? my mum didn't so we bought her a pc for christmas and set her up with a web cam so she can get used to it before we go!
Talking to each other is a major part of the ups and downs that you are facing and will face on the other side but as long as you stick together i'm sure you will be fine,
Take care and best wishes
Rach, Mark and Chanelle xxx
ps what part of brissie are you hoping to go to?
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:08 pm
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Hi Rach - good post and you're spot on with the webcam. My parents (infact my father ) is realy into the whole PC thing (too much money from retirement ) but he's yet to get a webcam. I'm going to buy a webcam for us each before we leave and get it working before we go. I aready mentioned this to my little nipper and he's dead keen to talk to his Nan & Grandand via webcam (although it's a poor substitute for seeing them on weekends)

With regards to location, well we've had our eye on Ferny Grove and Samford for some time now, so I guess that we'll be mooching around that area when we first land.

I know that everyone feels the same but if I can get the wife and kiddie settled then 99% of my worries will be out of the way
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:15 pm
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Snap, we too have looked at Samford & Ferny Grove although i've been told it may be too hot! also looked at Albany Creek, Bellbowrie and Victoria Point but we'll have to see if we can afford it!
Sure that with your attitude you'll be fine mate, what do you do for work?
Rach x
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:27 pm
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I'm an IT Consultant (ok - i'm a computer programmer but that sounds too geeky)

To be honest, I dont care what I do. I can turn my hand to most things. I just want to get out there, settle down and earn an honest living - whatever it takes - I'm not that fussed. I'm going out there on a 136 visa on a category of Analyst/Programmer but I'm not proud and will do whatever it takes to pay the bills (within reason :scared

My prime concern at the moment is my son who seems to be on the edge as far as the move is concerned. I want to tell him to trust that his father has his best interest at heart and that things will work out better in the end but that is a huge leap of faith that is going to take some persuading

This board is a lifeline to some of us. If we can get to Brissy and meet up with some of you all then I'm sure that things will get a whole lot better for people like us
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:34 pm
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It doesn't sound geeky that your a computer programmer at all! without people like you our computers wouldn't work!
Our attitude is the same as yours, hubby is a plasterer but will do anything, he like you is not proud!
As i said your attitude is very much like ours, don't worry about your son, children like stability and at the moment that is a bit up in the air, i'm sure that once you are out there things will settle down and you'll all be fine (thats what i'm telling myself anyway!)
Keep smiling and take care, see you on the other side mate
rach x
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 9:42 pm
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Originally posted by steandleigh
Hi Essexnobby,

bumping 'ya to the top.

This thread got me - am feeling a bit the same at the mo. Our two will be 6 and 4 when we go later this year and although we hope that one day they will thank us, it's hard to guesstimate whether it'll all work out ok or all go t*ts up, with them regretting the move, missing grandparents etc.

At the end of the day, you've come this far and you've got to give it a go, no-one ever changed anything by sitting still on their arses.

Personally, we're going for it, full pelt, with a bit of pioneer spirit thrown in for good measure and what will be, will be.

If anything, it will be an experience for your son to look back on in later years and give him the confidence to try new things, without being afraid of making the leap.


My thoughts exactly. I hope a few years down the line that my son thanks us aswell for giving him this opportunity. No need to add more, Standleigh has summed it up in my opinion.

Tazzy
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Old Mar 19th 2004, 10:27 pm
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Originally posted by EssexNobby
I'm an IT Consultant (ok - i'm a computer programmer but that sounds too geeky)

To be honest, I dont care what I do. I can turn my hand to most things. I just want to get out there, settle down and earn an honest living - whatever it takes - I'm not that fussed. I'm going out there on a 136 visa on a category of Analyst/Programmer but I'm not proud and will do whatever it takes to pay the bills (within reason :scared

My prime concern at the moment is my son who seems to be on the edge as far as the move is concerned. I want to tell him to trust that his father has his best interest at heart and that things will work out better in the end but that is a huge leap of faith that is going to take some persuading

This board is a lifeline to some of us. If we can get to Brissy and meet up with some of you all then I'm sure that things will get a whole lot better for people like us
Hi there,

My boy is also 10 and he is having a great time here. We've been here since the start of January and he has settled really well. He even got a certificate from the school for settling so well in a new school. He made friends with some really nice boys straight away and his confidence has gone up hugely. I think that it was better for him to start school at the beginning of the school year. He wasn't the only new boy in his class. Its much easier to get involved in activities here. In the UK, he was always on a waiting list but you get straight in here.

My husband, Jim, is also a programmer, and he found a job the first week he started looking. The market is definitely picking up here if you have the right skills. He's J2EE etc and he's been in IT for over 14 years.

If your boy wants to email me, feel free, and I'll get Joseph to reply with pictures etc. He's prettty rubbish at writing emails, but I'll get him to make an effort! We are out West of Brisbane in Bellbowrie.

Jane
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Old Mar 20th 2004, 12:03 am
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Just to let you know these feelings and doubts ARE COMPLETELY NORMAL! We went through the same thing, feeling guilty, kids crying, family crying etc.

The worst bit is when you actually leave. I felt so bad with my daughter wailing in the car that she did not want to go or leave her friends. The thing is the kids settle in really easily. My eldest is 13 and he is Mr Popular at school here, elected on the council and all the girls swooning as he is a POM!! He has told me he never wants to go back to live in the UK.

The lifestyle we had before cant come close to what we have here. We have made more friends than we had before ( no time cos of work) and the kids are in a small, safe community, they can play out for the first time ever.

What I am trying to say is if you feel you want to go, you must. For us it has been worth all the tears to see what a difference this place has made to our kid's lives. They are healthier, more active and have heaps more local friends.

This really is the worst bit. Just remeber why you are leaving.

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Old Mar 20th 2004, 7:54 am
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I posted a similar post a few months ago as my son is nearly 10 and feels the same as yours.

A few months ago he used every opportunity to tell me how England was a great place and he never wants to leave! However, lately he seems to have become more used to the idea and asks lot of questions. He does still have bad days because he is leaving his nan and grandad.

Mum said that when she had him last she noticed that he kept looking at them for longs periods of time. When she asked him why he told her it was because he was going to miss them sooo much and he was trying to rememer their faces so that he wouldn't forget them. God, it makes me sad just thinking about it!!

What I am trying to say is that you are not alone and that I hope one day they will thank us for what we are doing!

Mandy

p.s I had alot of support off this site and actually got him to post on here and he talked to a few of the the children of the members of the forum, do a search, it made him feel better!
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