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We can't justify going after all
This is a l-o-n-g post, but I expect it will be one of my last.
Well today we finally decided that we can't justify moving to Adelaide after all. We have citizenship already from a previous 4 year spell in Sydney, so no visa required. My mum and stepdad are in Adelaide and on the plus side was: - the family support (especially for my kids who would have 2 other adults to give a damn about them) - the financial freedom that not having a mortgage would give me to open my own business and, hopefully, have job security (opening my own business would be a necessity, actually, because there are scarcely any IT jobs there) - the ability of my wife, a teacher, to work there for a similar salary to here - what seemed like good schools - the sun, sea and sand aspect of things It all seemed like the thing to do when we visited this time last year, not least because I had been made redundant and was finding the market tough. So too, we had already sold our house (in anticipation of the property crash that hasn't happened - yet). When I landed a 6 month contract, it all seemed to dovetail nicely into finishing the contract and getting on the plane. I bit the bullet and booked the flights. I had to since they were getting booked out. However, the job market then started to pick up some more and I was offered a permanent job that, after much deliberation, I turned down in favour of the utter uncertainty of the Adelaide option. Shortly after that came my first really strong doubts. What on earth had I done? I asked myself. In hindsight, turning it down was a mistake. I'm still not quite sure why I did it. My best guess is that the act of planning to go had in itself turned a last resort into a first resort. It had taken on its own momentum. As time went by my doubts increased. I can't begin to tell you how much grief this decision making process has caused my wife and me. We did some more research into my wife's job prospects and found that finding a job in TAFE (the age group she teaches) looked very difficult indeed. There seemed to be no vacancies and any that did turn up seemed to be snapped up by internal candidates. We looked into secondary school teaching and discovered that teachers are expected to work in country areas for years before getting a job near the city, such is the supply/demand situation. Not only did that seem like a non-starter but my wife has no secondary school experience; it's all post 16 and adults, so she would be at a disadvantage going for secondary school positions in the first place (she has no desire to teach in a secondary school either). I did some research into business opportunities too. Looked at a few franchises. One was a "rent a wreck" type of car hire business. Looked OK at first but on closer inspection it only worked if you had the cash to buy the cars in the first place and didn't account for loss of interest on that cash. Naturally, if you treated that cash as a loan from the bank the business plan fell apart completely. So much for that. I looked into IT businesses too and they were the only ones that I could justify getting into. I really couldn't risk using the money from our house sale to buy a business and the IT ones require fairly little start-up capital, plus I have the skills. This could have worked, though of course it would have involved some risks. Had the movers round doing quotes last week. Crunch time really looming now. Last week too the Halifax house price index was released and showed a further fall in November. Definite signs of a property price crash looming. Perhaps the prospect of buying a decent sized house in the UK wasn't such an impossible dream. More agonising over whether to go or not last weekend. Decided that the prospect of paying £3k plus to ship furniture over there and, if things didn't work out, a similar sum to ship it all back, was just too much to contemplate, so decided to put the furniture in self-storage for a year or whatever (we'd be staying with my mum and stepdad for as long as we could bear each other). Called stepfather. He pointed out it wasn't what you knew but who you knew when it came to jobs in Adelaide. He also questioned what the driving force was wanting us to go there. Seemed pretty clear he was warning us to think very carefully. Posted his comments on this board to see the reaction. Asked our kids how they felt. Previously they'd been keen but now less so; not bothered either way. Thought about the kids of the people we knew there and got very concerned about the lack of achievement we saw. Our kids aren't top of the class and would be influenced quite heavily by their peers. In a culture of low achievement they would quite possibly end up achieving less than they could. It struck us that we couldn't think of any real success stories among the young adults we knew there. Posted here again on that topic and the answers really did confirm what we always knew, that Adelaide was not the place to be if you were educated and ambitious. I know our kids would love growing up there but I want my kids to have the chance to do better than me. I just can't see that happening there. Sure, we could go for a year or so, try to make a go of it and return if things didn't work out, but again, our kids are both summer babies and young in their year group. They are in a good school now and I'm reluctant to have them go to an Adelaide school and then have to return. My wife teaches lots of kids who had their education disrupted like this. They are doing GCSE resits after failing them all first time around. So, decision made. Bottom line is that for us Adelaide is and always was a location of last resort. We never did have that overwhelming enthusiasm / desire to get away from the UK that so many on this board have. You need that enthusiasm if you want to emigrate. I'm sad because my plans to go into business on my own have taken a knock. I'm far more sad that my kids won't have grandparents they can see when they like. Kids who do have grandparents on tap have a real advantage. My wife sees it every day in the kids who do have this extra attention and, quite honestly, it makes us envious as hell. Right, time to get on with it. |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Wow, that is a pretty big decision...and if it feels right...then thats what you have to do for you and your family.
As you have the passport already, there is nothing from stopping you going down the track whenever you feel it might be a better time for your family. Well done you guys, and just because you arent going anymore....doesnt mean you have to become strangers on the forum!!! :D |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Glad you did all that thinking before taking the leap. It sounds like you really sorted through all the pros and cons.
Although it's not for you right now, it doesn't mean it never will be. Who knows what's around the corner. I hope you find what you are looking for here in the UK and wish you all the very best for yours and your family's futures. |
Re: We can't justify going after all
jeeze, i,m glad Captain Cook .Magellan, Abel Tasman, Vascoe DeGama,christopher Columbus,etc did,nt think like this ;) ............. :beer: mm
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Re: We can't justify going after all
I think you've approached it the right way, its hard sometime to sift through the more extreme arguments posted about pro/cons of leaving. If we emmigrate it will be taking our son away from his grandparents and that is something we still agonise over as family relationships are important to us.
What doesn't seem right for you now may do so another time :) |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Originally Posted by sackofspuds
This is a l-o-n-g post, but I expect it will be one of my last.
Well today we finally decided that we can't justify moving to Adelaide after all. We have citizenship already from a previous 4 year spell in Sydney, so no visa required. My mum and stepdad are in Adelaide and on the plus side was: - the family support (especially for my kids who would have 2 other adults to give a damn about them) - the financial freedom that not having a mortgage would give me to open my own business and, hopefully, have job security (opening my own business would be a necessity, actually, because there are scarcely any IT jobs there) - the ability of my wife, a teacher, to work there for a similar salary to here - what seemed like good schools - the sun, sea and sand aspect of things It all seemed like the thing to do when we visited this time last year, not least because I had been made redundant and was finding the market tough. So too, we had already sold our house (in anticipation of the property crash that hasn't happened - yet). When I landed a 6 month contract, it all seemed to dovetail nicely into finishing the contract and getting on the plane. I bit the bullet and booked the flights. I had to since they were getting booked out. However, the job market then started to pick up some more and I was offered a permanent job that, after much deliberation, I turned down in favour of the utter uncertainty of the Adelaide option. Shortly after that came my first really strong doubts. What on earth had I done? I asked myself. In hindsight, turning it down was a mistake. I'm still not quite sure why I did it. My best guess is that the act of planning to go had in itself turned a last resort into a first resort. It had taken on its own momentum. As time went by my doubts increased. I can't begin to tell you how much grief this decision making process has caused my wife and me. We did some more research into my wife's job prospects and found that finding a job in TAFE (the age group she teaches) looked very difficult indeed. There seemed to be no vacancies and any that did turn up seemed to be snapped up by internal candidates. We looked into secondary school teaching and discovered that teachers are expected to work in country areas for years before getting a job near the city, such is the supply/demand situation. Not only did that seem like a non-starter but my wife has no secondary school experience; it's all post 16 and adults, so she would be at a disadvantage going for secondary school positions in the first place (she has no desire to teach in a secondary school either). I did some research into business opportunities too. Looked at a few franchises. One was a "rent a wreck" type of car hire business. Looked OK at first but on closer inspection it only worked if you had the cash to buy the cars in the first place and didn't account for loss of interest on that cash. Naturally, if you treated that cash as a loan from the bank the business plan fell apart completely. So much for that. I looked into IT businesses too and they were the only ones that I could justify getting into. I really couldn't risk using the money from our house sale to buy a business and the IT ones require fairly little start-up capital, plus I have the skills. This could have worked, though of course it would have involved some risks. Had the movers round doing quotes last week. Crunch time really looming now. Last week too the Halifax house price index was released and showed a further fall in November. Definite signs of a property price crash looming. Perhaps the prospect of buying a decent sized house in the UK wasn't such an impossible dream. More agonising over whether to go or not last weekend. Decided that the prospect of paying £3k plus to ship furniture over there and, if things didn't work out, a similar sum to ship it all back, was just too much to contemplate, so decided to put the furniture in self-storage for a year or whatever (we'd be staying with my mum and stepdad for as long as we could bear each other). Called stepfather. He pointed out it wasn't what you knew but who you knew when it came to jobs in Adelaide. He also questioned what the driving force was wanting us to go there. Seemed pretty clear he was warning us to think very carefully. Posted his comments on this board to see the reaction. Asked our kids how they felt. Previously they'd been keen but now less so; not bothered either way. Thought about the kids of the people we knew there and got very concerned about the lack of achievement we saw. Our kids aren't top of the class and would be influenced quite heavily by their peers. In a culture of low achievement they would quite possibly end up achieving less than they could. It struck us that we couldn't think of any real success stories among the young adults we knew there. Posted here again on that topic and the answers really did confirm what we always knew, that Adelaide was not the place to be if you were educated and ambitious. I know our kids would love growing up there but I want my kids to have the chance to do better than me. I just can't see that happening there. Sure, we could go for a year or so, try to make a go of it and return if things didn't work out, but again, our kids are both summer babies and young in their year group. They are in a good school now and I'm reluctant to have them go to an Adelaide school and then have to return. My wife teaches lots of kids who had their education disrupted like this. They are doing GCSE resits after failing them all first time around. So, decision made. Bottom line is that for us Adelaide is and always was a location of last resort. We never did have that overwhelming enthusiasm / desire to get away from the UK that so many on this board have. You need that enthusiasm if you want to emigrate. I'm sad because my plans to go into business on my own have taken a knock. I'm far more sad that my kids won't have grandparents they can see when they like. Kids who do have grandparents on tap have a real advantage. My wife sees it every day in the kids who do have this extra attention and, quite honestly, it makes us envious as hell. Right, time to get on with it. my friends went out to sydney 8 yrs ago got citizenship and intended on going back four years ago. her husbands work suddenly started to improve, the house wouldnt sell for what they wanted and so it dragged on right up to this year! they have now summed it all up and have decided to leave it for a year or two and will then go as the kids will be older. in a nutshell, they have done the same and are happy now the decision has been made and are looking forward to getting the kids as well educated as poss before they go to oz again in a few years. be happy with your decision, have a blinding christmas now that there is less stress about and enjoy others experiences on the forum, you can offer help and advice too as youve been there! all the best to you and yours. Trish :) |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Hi,
all I can say is always keep it in the back of your mind rather than abandoning it all together. Things change and so might your opportunities. Keep in touch with what's going on in Oz so that you don't miss a chance if it does come up. Our plans depend heavily on whether our kids want to go all that way. If they don't, we're off the day the youngest turns 18. |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Sackofspuds
I am shocked at the response you got from the Adelaidebrits site :eek: : http://s2.invisionfree.com/Adelaideb...showtopic=5051 You asked a simple question that any parent would ask and reaped a 'whirlwind' Is it so wrong to wish for your kids to have a successful future? As I have said my son has done well in Adelaide but through his education and experience elsewhere. Good luck to you whatever you decide to do. Some people don't seem to realise that, for many of us, a successful and fulfilling career is just as important as whether the sun shine or the beaches are nice. Best wishes for the future. G Ps. why not go somewhere else in Australia where education and a career are considered important? |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Have you considered retraining in an in demand occupation to help your propects?
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Re: We can't justify going after all
Wouldn't say it was a whirlwind. ;-)
There are jobs in Adelaide. It's not a city of mud huts. You may have to be lucky, or focused to get them of course. As these people point out, being a professional is not everything. I'd rather be an educated tradesman than a professional, apart from IT, and the traditional professions, most tradies are better paid in both the UK and Australia. With the advent of the internet, anyone can be educated - just by reading. Reading is probably the most important educational skill up to 16. From this stems everything else, and options are kept open. I'm not saying reading is the only thing of course. I would seriously question my children's wish to go to Uni if I thought they were just doing it for peer pressure. B |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Originally Posted by Grayling
Sackofspuds
I am shocked at the response you got from the Adelaidebrits site :eek: : http://s2.invisionfree.com/Adelaideb...showtopic=5051 You asked a simple question that any parent would ask and reaped a 'whirlwind' Is it so wrong to wish for your kids to have a successful future? As I have said my son has done well in Adelaide but through his education and experience elsewhere. Good luck to you whatever you decide to do. Some people don't seem to realise that, for many of us, a successful and fulfilling career is just as important as whether the sun shine or the beaches are nice. Best wishes for the future. G Ps. why not go somewhere else in Australia where education and a career are considered important? |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Originally Posted by Badge
Wouldn't say it was a whirlwind. ;-)
There are jobs in Adelaide. It's not a city of mud huts. You may have to be lucky, or focused to get them of course. As these people point out, being a professional is not everything. I'd rather be an educated tradesman than a professional, apart from IT, and the traditional professions, most tradies are better paid in both the UK and Australia. B If you are happy with what you do then there is no problem. I was appalled that someone could ask a simple question about their kid's future and recieve a tirade about 'snobbishness' or a lecture in ' you don't have to pursue a career to be happy' type response. Many people are driven by their calling/interest/ambition etc. and lucky for the rest of us that they are. No one becomes a Doctor or teacher to get rich. I also don't believe that people migrate halfway round the world to be worse off. Hands up anyone who does not want their children to do well :rolleyes: best wishes G |
Re: We can't justify going after all
I didnt read his question as "snobbish"....In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with guaranteeing your kids choice and opportunity.
If in the end they do want to be toilet cleaners, and that makes them happy, then great!! But imagine moving to a place that only offers that as a choice(not saying thats the only choice in Adelaide either) and they want to be a Doctor....how would you feel as a parent then? I think we all want the best opportunities for our children. I dont call that snobbish, I call it loving. Hels |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Originally Posted by Grayling
Badge
If you are happy with what you do then there is no problem. I was appalled that someone could ask a simple question about their kid's future and recieve a tirade about 'snobbishness' or a lecture in ' you don't have to pursue a career to be happy' type response. Many people are driven by their calling/interest/ambition etc. and lucky for the rest of us that they are. No one becomes a Doctor or teacher to get rich. I also don't believe that people migrate halfway round the world to be worse off. Hands up anyone who does not want their children to do well :rolleyes: best wishes G I am a real biggie on education. Reading is the key. With that, and a bit of practical ability where required, you're set up for life. Of course, you have to get in to some things earlier rather than later, and plan, too. And I didn't think it was a snobbish question, either. BM |
Re: We can't justify going after all
Originally Posted by Grayling
Badge
If you are happy with what you do then there is no problem. I was appalled that someone could ask a simple question about their kid's future and recieve a tirade about 'snobbishness' or a lecture in ' you don't have to pursue a career to be happy' type response. Many people are driven by their calling/interest/ambition etc. and lucky for the rest of us that they are. No one becomes a Doctor or teacher to get rich. I also don't believe that people migrate halfway round the world to be worse off. Hands up anyone who does not want their children to do well :rolleyes: best wishes G The main thing is to provide opportunities and not to scoff at ones ambitions whether they be professional or trade related. |
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