mark 'n' joe

Fingers crossed for it all to be sorted by Christmas. So sorry your daughter has to go through it all. Keep us posted.

Big hugs
Joex

Phoenix

What an awful situation to be involved in. Poor kid. Sometimes I do wonder if these 'protective' people know what they are doing!

Good luck to you and your family

John_R

One thing to bear in mind is that your daughter is of an age were the courts will consider her opinion. I'm divorced but my ex refused me contact with our two children, 10K later, she on legal aid, I now have a contact order in place.
I am now in the process of emmigrating to oz, and visa application will require that my two children will have to undertake a medical, even though they will be staying here with their mother. This I know, is going to be a difficult hurdle as she will refuse to allow the children to have their checks done.

Don't give up, I nearly did if it wasn't for family and friends

John

alipally

Hi John,

I'm sure that I read somewhere that if you have a joint custody arrangement, then you don't need to have permission from your ex to get the meds done. I'm not sure if this is true, but it's worth investigating a little more before you ask for them to be done... get your legal rights in writing and go from there. The unfortunate thing in all of these things is the only winner out of all of this is the legal profession.

Sarah,
Sorry that your daughter had to go through that yesterday, but now, at least, everyone is absolutely clear what your ex's motivations are... Thinking about it, I think that I would be disappointed if this hadn't happened... I know that it's traumatic, but, if there had been another story behind this it would have come out during that visit. I know that your situation is absolutely cut and dried, but there are parents who genuinely aren't allowed to see their children because the parent who has custody tells the most awful lies in order to prevent contact.....
I wish you every success in December, when this whole thing will conclude and you will be able to move forward with your plans for a new life in Australia

vickyandrob

hi sarah just catching up on the thread, sorry it was such a difficult day for you all but just imagine - in a couple of weeks time you will have the best christmas present EVER and then onwards and upwards to your new start in oz - good luck with everything, try to stay positive, thinking of you

vicky

JAJ

If contact/access is in place, then custodial parent does not have the right to veto a medical exam.

If there is no contact in place, then just send evidence of this to DIAC and they will normally waive the medical requirement.

JAJ

In fairness to them, they have got a job to do and they've plenty of experience of being told bare-faced lies by either (or both) parents.

The reality is that the law in the United Kingdom, like that of many other jurisdictions, does not sever a parent's rights/responsibilities upon divorce or separation.

And it's also the case in the U.K. that a residence order does not authorise permanent removal from the jurisdiction without further reference to the courts. Perhaps it should, but then it would likely cause problems in other cases.

Unfortunately there's no easy way for any legal system to deal with a situation where two parents (or even one parent) detest each other.

nigelb

Hi everyone

many thanks for the many good wishes and support yesterday. I am positive that we get the order on 21st dec, our legal team are very positive, we have a barrister briefing on tues and cafcass home visit again on thur/fri. Come what may my daughter is the most important person in this and I felt so guilty for the ordeal she endured yesterday, but kids are resilient and she wants to go to oz and we have been through so much to get this far, the end is in sight now.

To anyone currently in this legal process, please hang in there however hard it becomes because legal process is there to protect the child and although sometimes that causes frustration and delays and sometimes upset ultimately justice will prevail.

I will keep you all posted - thanks again to all

Sarah

edie209

I have just read your post from beginning to end and mine and my wifes thoughts go out to you, we will be in the same situation very soon we both have children that have not seen their respective parents one side 2 years the other 4 years.

Just out of interest are you at Bodmin CC or Plymouth CC

nigelb

Hi edie209

We are at Bodmin CC or were I should say our final hearing is at high court Truro because all Cornwall cases have final hearing there and it is usually Judge Vincent I have been told. If you want to ask anything anytime pm or email me, this is such a daunting process and I have been so grateful for snippets of advice I have received along the way. I feel for all of us enduring this process and all I would say is keep every detail however trivial it may seem written down i.e dates, actions etc because you constantly get ask random questions and are expected to retrieve the information under stressful conditions at a moments notice. Make sure all corrrespondence is email or written to maintain your evidence trail this has helped us alots eg. when my ex contacted my new employer in oz, he emailed them and they sent us a copyof his email to print for our legal team, then he emailed my daughters proposed new school in oz etc. The info on Trinity chambers website under handouts is essential reading when compiling your statements etc.

good luck to you if you have to go that far.

I will keep you posted on our outcome, we have cafcass home visit this weds. back in court 21st dec.

Best wishes to all

Sarah

BethandAndrew

Hi Sarah.........got everything crossed for you still.........although from what I can see you will have a court order wrapped up for christmas
The Judge has to take several things into account on making his decision, and as long as you can tick each box you should be ok.
My Barrister used the 'Payne V Payne' case to get me through the court process..........and I feel confident for your case having been through it myself.
Focus on all the positive reasons for emigrating and you'll be fine in court.........
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!
Beth x x

nigelb

Thanks Beth, I am really trying to stay positive and we are focusing on our plans because I know from past experience that my ex will not react well to not getting his way so we will need to exit the UK asap.

Cafcass have said they will try not to have to interview my daughter anymore after what she went through on Friday so thats a relief. I just hope we make it.

Thanks for the support it is appreciated

Sarah

JenniGee

I'm not particularly religious, but sending blessings to you all. What a horrible thing to have to happen to you all & the fact that awful man was able to put your little girl through that just fills me with anger.

I'll be thinking of you all over the next few weeks & hopefully you will get your rewards very soon

We've decided to hold off until after Christmas withour situation - the girls have a visit booked with my ex for Christmas (first time since August) & the last thing we need is dramas & court orders. The difference is that our girls know & love their dad, but don't have lots of contact, He still sees fit to make our lives as difficult as possible though, despite our trying to be reasonable with him for the sake of the girls.

You make sure you treat yourselves to a fantastic Christmas once all this is over - you deserve it!

nigelb

Thanks Jenniegee

If there is contact in place and you can come to an agreement you could save alot of heart ache but if not then as with the rest of us you put your faith in the gods and our justice system. Make sure you utilise the many experiences of BE members who have been through this and achieved their dream. watch this space for some good news before christmas.

Good luck

Sarah

Katsmajics other half !!!

I have a son from a previous relationship whom i have not seen for a while due to his mother being a nasty piece of work, we put his name on the application and he did not do his meds we were asked by DIAC why so i emailed off a stat dec and our VISA came thru a couple of days later.

Good luck with it all my friend