bondipom

Please help I am a vivacious English girl currently banging an Aussie bloke. He's good in bed but that is as far as it goes. Anyway I have thousands of pounds of debt and am going to go to Oz with him on a spouse visa. So easy and quick to get.

Not that I want to go to the flee ridden country but it means I can get away from the SLC and credit cards companies. Even my flight won't get paid off.

Any of you know how I can maintain the appearance of a relationship for the 2 years before I get permanent residence?

Ms Troll

dotty

Having gone down this route myself I think you'll find it easier if you get knocked up pretty quickly. Suddenly you'll be upgraded to UTD (up the duff) status and fast tracked.

As for the debts, just send them to centerlink, the websites on here somewhere.

DianeOZ

May as well spew out a few sproglets and screw the system as well as your bloke.

DianeOZ

Damn Dotty - you beat me to it - great minds.

bondipom

What can I get away with? Do you get free housing by the sea with a pool and deckchairs?

dotty

Been here 5 weeks myself now, (could not stand those theiving refos in the UK) Centerlinks ace, airconditioned too I could sit there all day, try the latte just like starbucks.

DianeOZ

Of course, choice of colours in the latest 'loungers' and a weekly food hamperl full of brand times like Heinz & Marmite with a couple of Crownies for the bloke.

Would you like a spa to go with the pool madam?

Ceri

Make sure you have his dinner on the table for him each night like a good aussie wife does. Associate with only his friends wives - ie go all the fun BBQ's , drink wine from a plastic glass as that will make you look like a posh Aus wife. Make sure you talk to all the Aus Girlfriends/wives about the price of bread etc and decorating ideas at these fun BBQ's and other such various interesting topics.. And make sure you turn the lights off at 9pm each evening,as you need your rest for the next exciting day.

If all that fails .. just think of England, constantly slag it off and praise up Australia.. that should do it.

bondipom

I would prefer a pool cleaner for when the bloke goes down the bottlo via centrelink.

dotty

Housing, well thats a joke, we only have 2 bathrooms, and the Pool, right rip off, we have to share it with 3 other families! Beach view, hup! some idiot stuck an opera house right in the bloody way.

bondipom

He is just for the visa and the pleasure. I'll try not to demean myself by hanging out with Aussies. Those scousers round Perth sound ideal.

DianeOZ

Dotty will help you out with the cleaner, she is juggling a couple of them at present. I can only help you out with the Phylipino maid I'm afraid.

dotty

[QUOTE]Originally posted by bondipom


Get the visa luv. then get out. Ceris right, you'll be chained to the sink and oven in no time, they dont even 'ave ready peeled spuds here. I'll tell ya its the dark ages as far as uz birds are concerned.

Ceri

why don't you find yourself a "scouser" PR or citizen and latch onto him? That way you can still stay in Aus, and dump the Aussie bloke

Megalania

Dearest Ms Troll,

You have my deepest sympathy. I see you are a victim of the generalized social decline which has steadily blighted Britain down the ages. Your descent into slavish penury and devious duplicity is just an ever so common symptom if this general malaise aflicting your home land.

As you can see from these pages, indeed this very thread, Ms Troll, these shores have been sadly contaminated with the same sickness eminating from the very same source.

So I say to you, Ms Troll, lift your gaze and may the Dream of the Promised Land sustain you while you clear your debt to your future society.