slapphead_otool

I love England, but I don’t wear rose tinted glasses when I look at it. The place is just about a lost cause now, and it breaks my heart to admit it.

Grayling

....and some feel exactly the same way about Australia....so what is the difference?

slapphead_otool

I’m sorry, I don’t believe in the therapeutic value of a group of people sitting around bitching about how unhappy they are (in fact it is distinctly unhealthy). I don’t see any value in it at all, and when the target is well off the mark it really piddles me off.
Its just a bunch of people who don’t want to accept responsibility for their own actions.

“Im unhappy, so someone must be to blame for it”.

To be honest, I am a bit embarrassed reading some of the posts here from fellow Englishmen.

Grayling

So does this apply to those who bitch about the UK?

There is plenty of that on this site.

Why is it OK to bitch about the Uk but not about Australia....why the double standard.....from you in particular?

kporte

Because you don't believe in it doesn't make it wrong though. I see absolutely no difference between that and your anti-uk posts and you are being totally hypocritical.
If talking about your unhappiness is unhealthy you better let all the mental health professionals know, because they are under the illusion this is vital to recovery and well being.

slapphead_otool

There is a difference. I am English, and I am not living in the UK. I earned the right to complain about the poor state of my homeland mate.

I don’t think the UK is in too good a shape right now. Maybe things will improve, maybe not. I pray things do get better.

But I am not living there and then complaining about it.

And I am not blaming the state of the UK for my state of unhappiness.

Please tell me why someone who is not Australian, but who resides here, should blame Australia for their unhappiness.

slapphead_otool

As I just pointed out, my criticism of the UK is genuine concern from the land of my birth. I pray to god they sort the mess out.

Sharing negativity just breeds negativity. Any healthcare professional will tell you that.

Sitting here telling everyone how unhappy you are in Australia is one thing.
Sitting here and blaming Australia for your homesickness, inability to make friends, get a decent job, or watch emerdale farm is plain stupidity. That’s NOT the fault of Australia.

Sometimes people are so obsessed with their dream they lose sight of reality. Blaming Australia for it is wrong….

kporte

I don't think anyone does though? I am in an unhappy situation just now and I find myself getting pissed of by a lot of things that never did when I was content. Unhappiness can infect every aspect of your life. I love living here but in the past few weeks the standard of driving here is annoying me, where previously it was amusing.
Again you fail to take into account human emotion and how we all cope.

slapphead_otool

I just got back from Vanuatu. A paradise island. They have hardly any driving rules. Even drink driving isn’t a crime. It’s a compromise deal. Spend time in paradise, get knocked over by a local high on kava.

I work a lot in Asia. If you want bad drivers try that. I once had a maniac silverbird driver take me from Jakarta airport to the city centre in 22 minutes. To do that he was doing over 120KPH on the wrong side of the road much of the way, and jumped most red traffic lights. He could give me no reason for his maniacal stoush. It’s a compromise deal, work in Asia, put up with the traffic and levels of insanity.

Australian drivers are bad. I love motorbikes, and it’s the climate for them, but the risk of being knocked off by some lunatic is too high. It’s a compromise deal…

And to be fair, by the time I left the UK driving standards weren’t that high either. The white vans had started their ascent to road power….

kporte

You understand my point though? Having a whinge about Australia doesn't mean you blame it for your woes.

slapphead_otool

I understand what you are saying. But the emphasis on BE seems to be one of blaming Australia because it either isn’t how you expected it to be, or you don’t like it, or you are homesick.

And most people seem to find some reason not to go back. Loss of money, partners, etc.

To be blunt, I strongly suspect that the reluctance to go back is loss of face. Its fine for your mates to see you off at the airport, “good on ya cobber” and all that. You are the conquering hero off to colonise distant lands.

But arriving back at the local a few months later and admitting you were homesick make you look a bit of a mummys boy...

"He couldnt take it, had to run home to his mum..."

ElizabethR

Having just read this thread, I honestly can not believe some people. Your post is well said and I agree with you . Talking about how you feel even if it is negative is very good for your mental health.
Ps been here since the 70's , I do not believe it is the best country on earth it is just what is best for you.

JCSUPERMOTO

I like your thoughts slaphead

slapphead_otool

Can you give me some evidence of where a group of people taking to each other about how unhappy they are is therapeutic.

Note – the reference should be about discontented people taking to each other about their problems, not talking to councillors, or friends and family.

Grayling

There is plenty of evidence.....it is called emotional processing and is a valid therapeutic tool.

Why don't you give us some evidence that it is not?