JetBlast

Hi,

Well i was going to go to Oz on a student visa, i couldn't decide what to do, i go cold feet to be honest.

I have decided i am going to go to Oz on a working holiday visa instead and then if i like it pay for my studies the following year. Its going to cost me allot and i don't want to waste money if i decide its not for me.

I have just told the family and my father hasn't taken it well. His brother recently died so the timing isnt best to be honest. He is pretty upset. I am 19 and still living at home.

To be honest i am feeling very guilty at the moment, i feel physically sick. I just don't know what to do with myself.

How did you guys cope and how did the families take it?

Sorry if its a random post but i really dont know what to do.

Thank You

Wendy66

Hoping it all turns out good for you

My parents are both dead but we told hubbys parents the day we got the PR visa, his mother was upset but kept very composed and his dad did the talking to help her. They wanted us to be happy so it couldn't have gone better really but the build up to telling them was worse, if I could turn the clock back we'd tell them when we were thinking about going for the visa.

There are lots of threads on here about how family take the news, I think most seem to come round in the end. I bet your dad is upset at his recent loss but will want the best life for you in the end x

Streaks

I think if you're not 100% about a possible move then you are doing the right thing by coming over on a whv, if you don't you will always wonder 'what if'. You will have more time to research the student visa route with all it's complications whilst you are here if you decide it's what you want. We have all gone through the family thing but at 19 and coming over by yourself is a pretty brave thing to do, most of us have made the move with partners etc. This way you will grow to know what its like not being with the family near by and see if you can cope with this. I wish you all the very best in the future you sound like you've got your head screwed on - good luck!
S xx

Seneca21

It's not a random post. At 19 you are your own man, and you must do what is best for you and your future. You make the decisions about your future, not your father. Life is about options. What choice will give you the most options as you grow older?

pink13

Don't feel guilty, I did it the other way and left (her choice) my daughter in the UK, and a huge family/friend network, it wasn't easy lots of tears etc but if you don't try you will never know,

Its not like it was years ago when people emigrated to Australia it was probably the last time you saw them, now days with the internet, cheap calls and flights more accessible its not quite so final.

At the moment your father will be grieving still and thinking along the lines of he is losing you as well, a little bit of compassion and reassurance from you will make him see you are going on an adventure of a life time and you will be back.

Good luck you are young and its a fantastic opportunity enjoy your life and keep smiling xxx

Seneca21

The OP should not count on cheap flights. They're already an outrageous scandal and they're planning on making them even eless affordable, but other than that I do agree with your post.

harrip

I did the gradual move rather than the jump in all at once. It started by coming here for a 6 week backpacking holiday. I enjoyed this and followed it up with a computer course which turned into a degree course and then I finally got PR. I say all this because your gradual approach seems sensible and well considered.

My family have not travelled that far and going to Australia was like dropping off the earth. The truth is your only 24 hours physically away from the UK and always just a phone/skype call away. I've always reassured my folk of this and find it helps make the world a smaller place which they find reassuring.

Seneca21

Incremental is a good way yes, especially if the family are heavily localised. I know some families that have been in the same town for as long as they can remember, never mind the same country.

JetBlast

Hi,

First off all thanks for your posts. Its helped.

I have a holiday booked for 6 weeks and i leave in December. The family are coming along but only for 3 weeks. My parents have business to run and my brothers have school and college. This will be my 3rd time in going,

I have decided i will leave it until about February / March / May. I will get a few more months of work in and then it will give me more time to prepare for stuff.

I have probably got enough airmiles for a free one way ticket by now so that wont be to bad really.

I will be staying with my Uncle who has lived there for 35 years so i wont be on my own.

Thanks for your posts, makes me feel better