Go Back  British Expats > Living & Moving Abroad > Australia
Reload this Page >

Thinking of moving as a single mum

Thinking of moving as a single mum

Old Apr 4th 2021, 8:21 am
  #1  
Just Joined
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Apr 2021
Posts: 3
Annamumto3 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Thinking of moving as a single mum

Hello

im trying to learn as much as I can as I’m deciding between Canada and Australia for my family. There are 4 of us. Myself (40) my son (18) other son (11) daughter 4 months)
my older 2 are fully onboard to move and are really excited.
im looking at the legal side. My 11 year old was conceived using a sperm donor. I have no paperwork to prove this as I fled
domestic abuse and left it all behind. My 4 month old daughter was conceived by rape with my ex partner (long list of abuse including child abuse!) I’m pressing charges and have been told there isn’t enough evidence so the case will likely be dropped. My ex is not on my daughters birth certificate. He asked to be kept in the loop when I was 6 months pregnant. I’ve heard nothing since (he’s had means to contact me through social services as I am supporting there case against him not being allowed to see his children after witnessing the hell he put them and their mother through while we were together.

im trying to find out if I’d need his permission to take my daughter to live in Australia even though he isn’t on her birth certificate.
and if I’d need court permission to take my 11 year old out of the country please?

Annamumto3 is offline  
Old Apr 4th 2021, 8:46 am
  #2  
Concierge
 
spouse of scouse's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2013
Location: Western Australia
Posts: 19,886
spouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond reputespouse of scouse has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Hi Anna, welcome to BE

As your situation with your two youngest kids is quite complex I really think you need professional advice re your options to remove them from the UK. If funds are an issue, do you have a community legal centre or a citizen's advice bureau near you? As a rule of thumb for children who are minors, you'd either need the father's permission to take them overseas, or if that was refused then you need to apply for permission from the relevant court. But I really do think you need to seek professional advice.

Re your 18 year old, is he still in education or is he working?

Also, what visa are you planning to move to Australia on?

Last edited by spouse of scouse; Apr 4th 2021 at 8:49 am.
spouse of scouse is offline  
Old Apr 4th 2021, 9:08 am
  #3  
Just Joined
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Apr 2021
Posts: 3
Annamumto3 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Hi

thank you for the reply
i have had a free 30 min online chat with a immigration solicitor. They have said no permission is needed because I have sole parental responsibility for both kids.

my 18 year old is home educated and in full education still yes
Annamumto3 is offline  
Old Apr 4th 2021, 11:02 am
  #4  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: Perth
Posts: 6,696
the troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Have I missed something? On what grounds will you emigrate? Do you have a sponsor? Or in a position that is in short supply in either country? It's not just a matter of wanting to go, as I'm sure you realize.
the troubadour is offline  
Old Apr 4th 2021, 11:21 am
  #5  
MODERATOR
 
old.sparkles's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2009
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 28,430
old.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by Annamumto3 View Post
Hi

thank you for the reply
i have had a free 30 min online chat with a immigration solicitor. They have said no permission is needed because I have sole parental responsibility for both kids.

my 18 year old is home educated and in full education still yes
I moved to Australia as a single mum, but I have a skill in demand and moved on a skilled visa.

Without a skill in demand (as per your post in the Canada section), it is unlikely that you will be able to move to any country. Yes it is theoretically possible to study something and get a student visa, but there are limited working rights associated with a study visa, and the costs significant.

Have you considered OU in the UK or other online study to get you a skill. Obviously, by the time you achieve the necessary skill level, your oldest would be unlikely to be able to be included as a dependent but not impossible.

Edit - sorry, just seen your age. I don't think even studying for a skill will get you to AU - not sure on NZ

Last edited by old.sparkles; Apr 4th 2021 at 11:23 am.
old.sparkles is offline  
Old Apr 5th 2021, 6:59 am
  #6  
BE Forum Addict
 
verystormy's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,321
verystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond reputeverystormy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by Annamumto3 View Post
Hi

thank you for the reply
i have had a free 30 min online chat with a immigration solicitor. They have said no permission is needed because I have sole parental responsibility for both kids.

my 18 year old is home educated and in full education still yes
Big alarm bells are ringing. You need to speak to a registered migration agent. There are a number who post regularly on the forum. The advice you have been given is wrong or at least too simple

The 18 year old will need to be in full time education at the time of application. That is likely to be many months from now. Home school at that level may also cause alarm bells.

Also what occupation are you planning on migrating under?
verystormy is offline  
Old Apr 5th 2021, 10:47 am
  #7  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: Perth
Posts: 6,696
the troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

I seriously wonder how a single mum, with the cost of child care think they would manage in a country like Australia? It could be assumed that the 18 year old would be further engaged in education or work and not be available as a child carer. The difficulties seem to outweigh any potential benefits even if came to pass.
the troubadour is offline  
Old Apr 5th 2021, 10:56 am
  #8  
MODERATOR
 
old.sparkles's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2009
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 28,430
old.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by the troubadour View Post
I seriously wonder how a single mum, with the cost of child care think they would manage in a country like Australia? It could be assumed that the 18 year old would be further engaged in education or work and not be available as a child carer. The difficulties seem to outweigh any potential benefits even if came to pass.
Same way single parents manage anywhere, with or without family support.
old.sparkles is offline  
Old Apr 6th 2021, 1:46 am
  #9  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: Perth
Posts: 6,696
the troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond reputethe troubadour has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by old.sparkles View Post
Same way single parents manage anywhere, with or without family support.
Well hardly. In a new country sans other family support without 'friends' not sure of means of support, I do get get the feeling it could pose greater difficulties. But feel free to elaborate if think otherwise.
the troubadour is offline  
Old Apr 6th 2021, 9:13 am
  #10  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 13,936
Beoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by the troubadour View Post
Well hardly. In a new country sans other family support without 'friends' not sure of means of support, I do get get the feeling it could pose greater difficulties. But feel free to elaborate if think otherwise.
Child care is heavily subsidised in Australia for those earning little.
Beoz is offline  
Old Apr 6th 2021, 9:46 am
  #11  
MODERATOR
 
old.sparkles's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2009
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 28,430
old.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by the troubadour View Post
Well hardly. In a new country sans other family support without 'friends' not sure of means of support, I do get get the feeling it could pose greater difficulties. But feel free to elaborate if think otherwise.
If migrating as a single parent then presumably they are used to juggling work and parental responsibilities. They also would have a skill in demand most likely to be migrating so hopefully not too low pay.

If you are used to juggling work, house, both parent roles, etc. you also get used to paying for childcare since you cannot afford to rely on family / friends constantly.

Now I admit my move as a single parent was when young spark was older, but before I moved I lived and worked near London and family live in Wales. Young spark has ASD and I'm very used to juggling work, home, hospital, therapy, childcare, etc, etc all around shiftwork!

old.sparkles is offline  
Old Apr 6th 2021, 9:51 am
  #12  
MODERATOR
 
old.sparkles's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2009
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 28,430
old.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by Beoz View Post
Child care is heavily subsidised in Australia for those earning little.
Not sure at what level you lose childcare subsidies, but its well above minimum wage from what I've heard.

Not sure what current costs are like in UK, but I seem to recall paying £150 - £200 week when young spark had full time childcare (which is going back one or two years lol) with no subsidies.
old.sparkles is offline  
Old Apr 6th 2021, 10:40 pm
  #13  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 13,936
Beoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond reputeBeoz has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by old.sparkles View Post
Not sure at what level you lose childcare subsidies, but its well above minimum wage from what I've heard.

Not sure what current costs are like in UK, but I seem to recall paying £150 - £200 week when young spark had full time childcare (which is going back one or two years lol) with no subsidies.
Up to $67,000 you are covered for 85% of the costs. Once the combined family income hits $350,000 you are on your own. This system does well for single mums but for those mothers who have the potential to earn well and pay a lot of tax this system does not provide the encouragement.

The cost per day varies on location. I know in the eastern suburbs of Sydney you can pay up to $200 per day. We pay about $115 and even that's mad but the hours of operation suit us.

If she was on minimum wage and had a child in for $100 per day she would cover the out of pocket expense in 1 hour of work.

Last edited by Beoz; Apr 6th 2021 at 10:49 pm.
Beoz is offline  
Old Apr 8th 2021, 10:01 am
  #14  
MODERATOR
 
old.sparkles's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2009
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 28,430
old.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond reputeold.sparkles has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by Beoz View Post
Up to $67,000 you are covered for 85% of the costs. Once the combined family income hits $350,000 you are on your own. This system does well for single mums but for those mothers who have the potential to earn well and pay a lot of tax this system does not provide the encouragement.

The cost per day varies on location. I know in the eastern suburbs of Sydney you can pay up to $200 per day. We pay about $115 and even that's mad but the hours of operation suit us.

If she was on minimum wage and had a child in for $100 per day she would cover the out of pocket expense in 1 hour of work.
Doesn't sound that bad. The £150-£200 week was probably close to half my wage if I only worked a flat week on days but I rarely did. And the half that was left was way better than dole. Plus working is better than not
old.sparkles is offline  
Old Apr 9th 2021, 4:26 am
  #15  
Forum Regular
 
Joined: Jan 2021
Posts: 69
okonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond reputeokonumiyaki has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Thinking of moving as a single mum

Originally Posted by Beoz View Post
Child care is heavily subsidised in Australia for those earning little.
Only for those with PR or citizenship...
okonumiyaki is offline  

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2022 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.