Seabird

Feeling really evil at the moment. :scared:

13-year old now very depressed and anxious about the fact that she feels her life is going nowhere and is meaningless as she doesn't know where she will be in 6 month's time, and is really struggling while we wait for the visa process. Had her at the doc's yesterday as it's got that bad. It hasn't been helped by a job offer I'd had last year in Canada not materialising because it was in defence and I'm not Canadian. Although I have a job to go to in Adelaide, she is really feeling so insecure that it may never happen. The fact that it's taken 4 months from initial discussions to even get to a written job offer hasn't helped me feel secure, especially as I was racing to try to beat my 45th birthday. Didn't make it so I am less able to assure her all will turn out okay. Sure my own insecurities are rubbing off.

I hope to hear a definite to whether DIIMIA accept my nomination by the end of the month, but to her that's still only another step and another few weeks away. She won't be happy until the stamp is on the passports (or not).

Starting to feel that I should just retract the idea and get her back on track, but know that the move is better for the two of us in the long-term.

Any tips or support from other forum members that have had to deal with insecure kids to get the two of us over this blimp gratefully accepted. Any other kids that have had the blimp welcomed too...

Thanks guys

Ransi

We know what your going through as our 12 year old son is having a hard time accepting that were leaving our home,family,friends,etc...
Cant even mention the 'A' word in front of him 'cos he'll go off on one!!
Keep telling ourselvs it will be worth it in the end :scared:
Take care,Ransi

Chris Mitchell

Hi Seabird,

Really feel for you on this one!

Have no answers I am afraid, but I know the indecision is getting to everyone in my family. We are thinking of putting a date on it if the house doesnt sell soon.

At the moment the kids get more upset at the thought of NOT going, so things are ok for awhile.

Remember for your daughter you also have those female hormones rattling around possibly helping all the feelings of insecurity etc.

Give her loads of cuddles time out with Mum so whatever happens she'll be secure in your relationship

Chris

CadburysFingers

Two years ago friends of ours moved out here with their 13 and 15 year old daughters, who weren't struck on the idea at all. 2 years on, they wouldnt leave Aus for a million quid each. Hang in there it will work itself out.

stunsearadron

Thanks Guys

Comments really helping. The biggest concern she has is about not going, but I think it's just the whole not-knowing that makes it hard. They are used to Mum or Dad being able to give definitive answers, and it's really hard when you can't give an answer month after month. Decided not to keep talking about the A word and concentrate on other things in her life here at the moment. Will let you know if it works.

andrew63

Moved here last October with my 13 yr old daughter (and rest of family). Took us 18 months to get through the visa process due to complications that my daughter considered her fault. Anyway, here now, very happy. If you want to get your daughter to MSN/email my daughter, let me know and we can swap details via PM.

Andrew

debilloyd

I've got two girls, 11 and 14. The 11 year can't wait but the 14 year old is like so many teenagers, she doesn't want to leave her friends and family and thinks her life should remain in the UK. She hates it when we mention the 'A' word but my philosophy is that keep talking about it and she'll resign herself to going in the end.

I don't any of us can give our offspring a definite yes or no as all our futures lie in the hands of the DIMIA. Hang on in there