Stereotyping

Old Feb 17th 2005, 5:17 am
  #1  
someone's had 'Alex'...
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: Vic Park, WA
Posts: 270
4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice
Default Stereotyping

My apologies if this has been posted fifteen times before, but I saw it for the first time in my email today and guess a few others might get a chuckle from it
____________________________________________

On what it means to be "Australian"

1. The bigger the hat, the smaller the farm.

2. The shorter the nickname, the more they like you.

3. Whether it's the opening of Parliament, or the launch of a new art gallery, there is no Australian event that cannot be improved by a sausage-sizzle.

4. If the guy next to you is swearing like a wharfie he's probably a media billionaire... or, on the other hand, he may be a wharfie.

5. There is no food that cannot be improved by the application of tomato sauce.

6. On the beach, all Australians hide their keys and wallets by placing them inside their sandshoes. No thief has ever worked this out.

7. Industrial design knows of no article more useful than the plastic milk crate.

8. All our best heroes are losers.

9. The alpha male in any group is he who takes the barbecue tongs from the hands of the host and blithely begins turning the snags.

10. It's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to hold.

11. A thong is not a piece of scanty swimwear, as in America, but a fine example of Australian footwear. A group of sheilas wearing black rubber thongs may not be as exciting as you had hoped.

12. It is proper to refer to your best friend as "a total bastard". By contrast, your worst enemy is "a bit of a bastard".

13. Historians believe the widespread use of the word "mate" can be traced to the harsh conditions on the Australian frontier in the 1890s, and the development of a code of mutual aid, or "mateship". Alternatively, Australians may just be really hopeless with names.

14. The wise man chooses a partner who is attractive not only to himself, but to the mosquitoes.

15. If it can't be fixed with pantyhose and fencing wire, it's not worth fixing.

16. The most popular and widely praised family in any street is the one that has the swimming pool.

17. It's considered better to be down on your luck than up yourself.

18. The phrase "we've got a great lifestyle" means everyone in the family drinks too much.

19. If invited to a party, you should take cheap red wine and then spend all night drinking the host's beer. (Don't worry, he'll have catered for it).

20. If there's any sort of free event or party within a hundred kilometres, you'd be a mug not to go.

21. The phrase "a simple picnic" is not known. You should take everything you own. If you don't need to make three trips back to the car, you're not trying.

22. Unless ethnic or a Pom, you are not permitted to sit down in your front yard, or on your front porch. Pottering about, gardening or leaning on the fence is acceptable. Just don't sit. That's what backyards are for.

23. The tarred road always ends just after the house of the local mayor.

24. On picnics, the Esky is always too small, creating a food versus grog battle that can only ever be resolved by leaving the salad at home.

25. When on a country holiday, the neon sign advertising the motel's pool will always be slightly larger than the pool itself.

26. The men are tough, but the women are tougher.

27. The chief test of manhood is one's ability to install a beach umbrella in high winds.

28. Australians love new technology. Years after their introduction, most conversations on mobile phones are principally about the fact that the call is "being made on my mobile".

29. There comes a time in every Australian's life when he/she realises that the Aerogard is a bloody sight worse than the flies.

30. And, finally, don't let the tourist books fool you. No-one EVER says "cobber" to anyone... EVER!
4lex is offline  
Old Feb 17th 2005, 6:19 am
  #2  
Dutch expat/Aus citizen
 
Simone's Avatar
 
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: South East, Perth (was Holland)
Posts: 5,789
Simone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond reputeSimone has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Stereotyping

Well, I've been on this forum for nearly 2 years ( ) and never seen it!

Originally Posted by 4lex
6. On the beach, all Australians hide their keys and wallets by placing them inside their sandshoes. No thief has ever worked this out.
But apparently these days a lot more mobile phones get stolen in the summer (ie on the beach)
Originally Posted by 4lex
22. Unless ethnic or a Pom, you are not permitted to sit down in your front yard, or on your front porch. Pottering about, gardening or leaning on the fence is acceptable. Just don't sit. That's what backyards are for.
Yeah, Pascal wanted to use the front porch to sit on, is he totally mad???!!! He is ethnic of course.... Well, if that means a foreigner...


I think most of these mostly apply to country ozzies, and it's a bit outdated, but there's still a lot of truth in it, lol
Simone is offline  
Old Feb 17th 2005, 9:51 am
  #3  
Rocket Scientist
 
MrsDagboy's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Dreamland AKA Brisbane which is a different country to the UK
Posts: 6,911
MrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond reputeMrsDagboy has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Stereotyping

Originally Posted by 4lex
3. Whether it's the opening of Parliament, or the launch of a new art gallery, there is no Australian event that cannot be improved by a sausage-sizzle.
My favourite - ohhh so true. Snag anyone?
MrsDagboy is offline  
Old Feb 17th 2005, 9:57 am
  #4  
someone's had 'Alex'...
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: Vic Park, WA
Posts: 270
4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice4lex is just really nice
Default Re: Stereotyping

My personal fave was
9. The alpha male in any group is he who takes the barbecue tongs from the hands of the host and blithely begins turning the snags.
which, in my experience rings completely true. Got to love barbequeing though
4lex is offline  

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service -

Copyright © 2024 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.