Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Jan 24th 2005, 10:00 pm
#16
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by honeybob
We have always tried to put our kids first, to the detriment of my mental health at times! 
ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!! 
thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!! thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
but he will have to stay at a boarding school. Find the Brochure of the worst, most disciplined boarding school in the Uk hand it to him and say this is where you will be living for the next 11 years untill you are 18. That should solve your problem.
Jan 24th 2005, 10:11 pm
#17
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by red back
Hi,
We had a similar situation with our children, we have 4 children, the youngest being 8 and the eldest 18, all well established here with good friends etc..
As parents It is our responsibility to make the dicisions for our children. My 18 year old is leaving a girlfriend behind and all his college friends but he respects my decision, that we know as parents what is best for him and them.
We had a similar situation with our children, we have 4 children, the youngest being 8 and the eldest 18, all well established here with good friends etc..
As parents It is our responsibility to make the dicisions for our children. My 18 year old is leaving a girlfriend behind and all his college friends but he respects my decision, that we know as parents what is best for him and them.
Younger children shouldn't have to decide for the family - it's up to them to change things once they grow up. Make a decision to make you happy, they will appreciate a happy parent. They then won't feel the resentment that will build up if you defer your happiness.
Jan 25th 2005, 7:15 am
#18
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by wombat42
Tell him your definently moving to OZ and if he wants to stay in the Uk he can
but he will have to stay at a boarding school. Find the Brochure of the worst, most disciplined boarding school in the Uk hand it to him and say this is where you will be living for the next 11 years untill you are 18. That should solve your problem.
but he will have to stay at a boarding school. Find the Brochure of the worst, most disciplined boarding school in the Uk hand it to him and say this is where you will be living for the next 11 years untill you are 18. That should solve your problem.
Anyhow, Wombat, often your words on here astound me, and othertimes you speak the 'cruelest' sense, never before have i thought of such actions, sheer genius springs to mind
Feeling better having read the returned posts, especially when you see that some kids now say they'd never come back to the uk... can only hope it turns out that way. someone came up with a good idea of letting our kids email each other and have a good moan about us parents....
Our son has given a few reasons about why he dosen't want to go, and they're all the 'usual' and expected reasons, but no doubt, very important to him... he'll really miss his nana, his friends and so on... He has perked up a bit like, asking if we could get a dog if we went
I came back with the, 'well if we get a dog, we can't just up and leave back to the uk', SILENCE!Professional Princess (Sam), whilst I absolutely love the smut that just flows from you
(with such ease I hasten to add), sometimes you say the most comforting things, when needed most, cheers for that...Thankyou again everyone...
Jan 25th 2005, 9:56 am
#19
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Joined: Nov 2004
Location: stockport UK
Posts: 32
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by moneypen20
Have just noticed my puddy tat has got a twin! Greetings redback. Got all confused for a min, thought "when did I post that?" - forgive me, not bright
Didnt realise, moneypen.
Would your kitty like to join my kitty in a little 80's style boogie? 'wake me up before ya go-go'
Jan 25th 2005, 10:28 am
#20
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Joined: Nov 2004
Location: stockport UK
Posts: 32
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by yonk
My decision? I hope it was your other halfs as well. And at 18, it's getting to the point that he can come back if he wants to as he is an adult.
Younger children shouldn't have to decide for the family - it's up to them to change things once they grow up. Make a decision to make you happy, they will appreciate a happy parent. They then won't feel the resentment that will build up if you defer your happiness.
Younger children shouldn't have to decide for the family - it's up to them to change things once they grow up. Make a decision to make you happy, they will appreciate a happy parent. They then won't feel the resentment that will build up if you defer your happiness.
And yes, he is an adult already, is also a college student, lives at home with me & my hubby (not sons father). I have given him the choice to come back to the UK if he doesnt settle.
Jan 25th 2005, 10:37 am
#21
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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by red back
Awwwwww!!
Didnt realise, moneypen.
Would your kitty like to join my kitty in a little 80's style boogie? 'wake me up before ya go-go'
Didnt realise, moneypen.
Would your kitty like to join my kitty in a little 80's style boogie? 'wake me up before ya go-go'
Look, they even boogy together
Jan 25th 2005, 12:49 pm
#22
Master of verbal pish©
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 22,198
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by wombat42
Tell him your definently moving to OZ and if he wants to stay in the Uk he can
but he will have to stay at a boarding school. Find the Brochure of the worst, most disciplined boarding school in the Uk hand it to him and say this is where you will be living for the next 11 years untill you are 18. That should solve your problem.
but he will have to stay at a boarding school. Find the Brochure of the worst, most disciplined boarding school in the Uk hand it to him and say this is where you will be living for the next 11 years untill you are 18. That should solve your problem.
i find this funny that a 7 year old kids make the decisions for the family :scared:
ignore the spellin, im a wee bit pished
Jan 25th 2005, 1:09 pm
#23
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Joined: May 2004
Location: Frankston South, Victoria
Posts: 2,867
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by honeybob
We have always tried to put our kids first, to the detriment of my mental health at times! ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!!
thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!! thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
The promise of a full sized snooker table did it for us with our 10 year old!
He wasn't too keen about the move at first and wouldn't go unless he could take his best friend with him (bless!). Then we said about the snooker table (house too small here to accommodate one) bingo!!!, we have a happy 10 year old.
To be quite honest, I'm not really sure it's has sunk in for our boys (other son is 12 years old). They know what we are planning but when the time comes to say our goodbyes etc, I'm dreading it (not just for me but mostly for my boys). I think it must be the same for most families.
Good luck
D D
Jan 25th 2005, 1:17 pm
#24
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Joined: Jan 2005
Location: Leeds/UK
Posts: 231
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
he he......
I have a 13 yo neice who's emigrating this year to Perth and she tells me she's gonna tie herself to her bed and scream on the day of the flight..... :scared:
i'll let you know her frame of mind next week lol
I have a 13 yo neice who's emigrating this year to Perth and she tells me she's gonna tie herself to her bed and scream on the day of the flight..... :scared:
i'll let you know her frame of mind next week lol
Jan 25th 2005, 1:23 pm
#25
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by UKintheUSA
I hunted her down and dragged her back home kicking and screamingDeb
Jan 25th 2005, 1:41 pm
#26
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Location: from Shepherds Bush to Aussie Bush. Well not quite - Mountain Creek, Sunshine Coast
Posts: 187
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by honeybob
We have always tried to put our kids first, to the detriment of my mental health at times! ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!!
thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
ie. haven't had a relaxing bath on my own since 1997, which i consider an important and much underappreciated pasttime!!! thought the move to australia would be a good one for all of us, and our 7 year old seemed really up for it, we discussed it with him or at least tried to!
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN. Thing is, he isn't a cheeky, bad tempered kid, he's just talking about it and that seems even worse. I have promised him, if he dosen't settle we come back, i'm feeling stressed at the minute, so wonder how a seven year old feels?
Anyone else had similar experiences, any advice, any wine, any answers?
Much appreciated, bob...
It has worked well, she can't wait now.
Also helps if you get the moving abroad shows on the TV, and some good photo's of where you would like to go.
Hope it goes well.......
Jan 25th 2005, 1:49 pm
#27
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Carramar, Perth
Posts: 6,241
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Our 7 year old didn't want to go at first. We have worked on her a lot and tried to sweeten the pill where possible. But because we have been talking about it as fact so long it has just been accepted as gospel and now she has got used to it. I think getting kids to settle, especially young ones, will be just about the easiest thing in the whole emigration process.
Jan 25th 2005, 2:29 pm
#28
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
My daughter (age 11) is all for going to Oz and cant wait which is great but I asked my son (age 8) last Sunday how he felt about going and he said (out right) 'No'. But I believe once we are out there and he can experience the Oz lifestyle he will soon settle and love it. My son is very much set in his ways and doesnt like change. (As are some adults!) But he knows we are taking our dog, plus the promise of a trampoline has swayed him a bit.
A bit of patience and some bribary should do the trick. Best of luck,
Karen
x
A bit of patience and some bribary should do the trick.
Best of luck, Karen
x
Jan 25th 2005, 2:41 pm
#29
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Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by UKintheUSA
He just dosen't want to go now, and i think it's going to be the final straw that will result in me backing out, AGAIN.
Who's in CHARGE HERE? You or the KID? So someday when you tell him he can't take drugs, can't drink and drive are you going to sit back and make a post like this on a forum? I hate to sound harsh here but GET A BACKBONE. Parents have the right to make decisions for their kids and themselves without having to EXPLAIN anything to their kids. I'll give you an example....
My now 26 year old daughter was in high school and wanted to go to a party with 5 of her friends. They were all aged 15-17. I said NO. She tried to sneak out of the house and go. I hunted her down and dragged her back home kicking and screaming.................She was sure pissed off at me all night.................Until the next morning when there was a special report about an accident in which 5 kids coming from a party were all KILLED IN AN ACCIDENT. The driver, who by the way was going to be DRIVING HER AS well to this party was drunk................as were all the other kids strewn all over the street, DEAD! So my moral of the story is parents have to take charge. They don't need to be mean, they don't need to be abusive, they don't need to EXPLAIN. They need to be in control. If you aren't now with a 7 year old, WAIT. You're days ahead will be tougher. Sorry to be such a hard ass with this but I have 2 kids that gave me a run for my money and I had to be tough with them. It has paid off and was well worth it. It usually hurts US, the PARENTS more to be firm than it does the kids.
OK, I'm done!
Deb
Who's in CHARGE HERE? You or the KID? So someday when you tell him he can't take drugs, can't drink and drive are you going to sit back and make a post like this on a forum? I hate to sound harsh here but GET A BACKBONE. Parents have the right to make decisions for their kids and themselves without having to EXPLAIN anything to their kids. I'll give you an example....
My now 26 year old daughter was in high school and wanted to go to a party with 5 of her friends. They were all aged 15-17. I said NO. She tried to sneak out of the house and go. I hunted her down and dragged her back home kicking and screaming.................She was sure pissed off at me all night.................Until the next morning when there was a special report about an accident in which 5 kids coming from a party were all KILLED IN AN ACCIDENT. The driver, who by the way was going to be DRIVING HER AS well to this party was drunk................as were all the other kids strewn all over the street, DEAD! So my moral of the story is parents have to take charge. They don't need to be mean, they don't need to be abusive, they don't need to EXPLAIN. They need to be in control. If you aren't now with a 7 year old, WAIT. You're days ahead will be tougher. Sorry to be such a hard ass with this but I have 2 kids that gave me a run for my money and I had to be tough with them. It has paid off and was well worth it. It usually hurts US, the PARENTS more to be firm than it does the kids.
OK, I'm done!
Deb
Each to their own
Jan 25th 2005, 2:54 pm
#30
A former regular of BE
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Carramar, Perth
Posts: 6,241
Re: Son, aged 7, just dosen't want to go!
Originally Posted by toocheeky
My daughter (age 11) is all for going to Oz and cant wait which is great but I asked my son (age 8) last Sunday how he felt about going and he said (out right) 'No'. But I believe once we are out there and he can experience the Oz lifestyle he will soon settle and love it. My son is very much set in his ways and doesnt like change. (As are some adults!) But he knows we are taking our dog, plus the promise of a trampoline has swayed him a bit.
A bit of patience and some bribary should do the trick. Best of luck,
Karen
x
A bit of patience and some bribary should do the trick.
Best of luck, Karen
x