sheep joke - do not read if easily offended
Sep 26th 2003, 9:02 am
#1
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sheep joke - do not read if easily offended
A researcher is conducting a survey into sheep shagging. First of all he visits an English farmer.
"So,English farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall."
"That's very interesting,"replies the researcher and he leaves the English farmer.Then he meets an Australian farmer.
"So,Australian farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall."
"That's very interesting,"replies the researcher,"That's how they do it in England too."And he leaves the Australian farmer.
Then he meets a farmer from New Zealand.
"So,kiwi farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and I take the front legs of the sheep and put them over my shoulders."
"Over your shoulders?"replies the researcher,"Don't you put them over a wall like everyone else?"
"What?"says the farmer,"and miss out on all the kissing?"
"So,English farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall."
"That's very interesting,"replies the researcher and he leaves the English farmer.Then he meets an Australian farmer.
"So,Australian farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and take the front legs of the sheep and put them over a wall."
"That's very interesting,"replies the researcher,"That's how they do it in England too."And he leaves the Australian farmer.
Then he meets a farmer from New Zealand.
"So,kiwi farmer,how do you shag your sheep?"
"Well,I take the hind legs of the sheep and put them down my wellie boot and I take the front legs of the sheep and put them over my shoulders."
"Over your shoulders?"replies the researcher,"Don't you put them over a wall like everyone else?"
"What?"says the farmer,"and miss out on all the kissing?"
Sep 26th 2003, 9:10 am
#3
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Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Near Duloc
Posts: 4,638
Originally posted by welshboybilly
picture from my wedding day
picture from my wedding day
Sep 26th 2003, 9:13 am
#4
Home and Happy
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Keep true friends and puppets close, trust no-one else...
Posts: 93,814
Someone sent me the same card when I said I was emigrating to get married to an Aussie!!!!
Sep 26th 2003, 9:16 am
#5
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Joined: Mar 2003
Location: Going Home
Posts: 1,215
An English tourist visiting the Outback of Australia notices a farmer goin' at it with a sheep in a nearby field.
The English guy taken aback by this, so he climbs the fence and walks over to the farmer. He taps him on the shoulder and says, "You know mate, back home, we shear those!"
The Aussie farmer looks frantically around and says, "I'm not bloody SHARING with anyone!"
The English guy taken aback by this, so he climbs the fence and walks over to the farmer. He taps him on the shoulder and says, "You know mate, back home, we shear those!"
The Aussie farmer looks frantically around and says, "I'm not bloody SHARING with anyone!"
Sep 26th 2003, 9:23 am
#6
farmer nr Queenstown NZ
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: doing stuff, lots of stuff
Posts: 367
what goes ..... ooooooooooooo?
a cow with no lips
i'll get me coat
a cow with no lips
i'll get me coat
Sep 26th 2003, 2:11 pm
#8
I Know What's Going On!
Joined: Jan 2003
Location: On The Outside Looking In!
Posts: 1,499
Quick, quick, we gotta find a room........
Sep 26th 2003, 2:14 pm
#9
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Location: Keep true friends and puppets close, trust no-one else...
Posts: 93,814
Now we know how Welshboybilly gets them home!
Wonder what role the dog has though......
Wonder what role the dog has though......
Sep 26th 2003, 3:14 pm
#10
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Originally posted by Pollyana
Now we know how Welshboybilly gets them home!
Wonder what role the dog has though......
Now we know how Welshboybilly gets them home!
Wonder what role the dog has though......
Sep 26th 2003, 8:49 pm
#11
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Location: Perth we were.Back in the uuuk
Posts: 355
Two farmers walking through a field checking the flock,
farmer one spots sheep with it's head stuck in a fence
not wanting to miss out on a god given opportunity he runs over drops his kecks and goes to work on the ewe,as he finishes he turns to farmer two and" says aren't you having some of that?"
Farmer two says "Yes but I'm not putting my head through that barbed wire fence!":scared:
farmer one spots sheep with it's head stuck in a fence
not wanting to miss out on a god given opportunity he runs over drops his kecks and goes to work on the ewe,as he finishes he turns to farmer two and" says aren't you having some of that?"
Farmer two says "Yes but I'm not putting my head through that barbed wire fence!":scared:
Sep 26th 2003, 8:55 pm
#12
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Originally posted by chris hogan
Two farmers walking through a field checking the flock,
farmer one spots sheep with it's head stuck in a fence
not wanting to miss out on a god given opportunity he runs over drops his kecks and goes to work on the ewe,as he finishes he turns to farmer two and" says aren't you having some of that?"
Farmer two says "Yes but I'm not putting my head through that barbed wire fence!":scared:
Two farmers walking through a field checking the flock,
farmer one spots sheep with it's head stuck in a fence
not wanting to miss out on a god given opportunity he runs over drops his kecks and goes to work on the ewe,as he finishes he turns to farmer two and" says aren't you having some of that?"
Farmer two says "Yes but I'm not putting my head through that barbed wire fence!":scared:
Sep 26th 2003, 9:33 pm
#13
Drowning Member
Joined: Sep 2003
Location: West Sussex.....for now!
Posts: 161
please tell me your joking, welshbillyboy
Sep 26th 2003, 9:38 pm
#14
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Location: Perth we were.Back in the uuuk
Posts: 355
Thanks S.C. Iwas begining to think the Kronenburg was getting to me
Sep 26th 2003, 9:40 pm
#15
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Originally posted by chris hogan
Thanks S.C. Iwas begining to think the Kronenburg was getting to me
Thanks S.C. Iwas begining to think the Kronenburg was getting to me
your going to have to explain it mate cos i am seriously missing something - like a brain
so farmer 1 is getting to know the sheep and farmer 2 well this is where i get lost