pabloako

They dont seem to sell Shreddies in Australia. Boy will we miss those!

sashimi

Come night time you guys are in for a serious pounding. Looking forward to the fallout

Chris H-L

Well, I fumbled about for a bit then, said to myself "get a grip", meanwhile the old gent behind made a strange gutteral noise - turned out he was having a stroke!

Vee

Oh yeah, forgot to mention how cool it is to live in London. It's cool being stuck on a tube in the middle of a tunnel with an armpit in your face, the smell of stale farts and a crying baby. It's so cool living in London with very rich people and very poor people; it's cool hearing rich people say to poor people who are begging for money "get to F*** - all my money is going on beer"; it's cool having people living on the roof of the buildings in front of you and spray painting creepy slogans on the building; it's cool to walk in dog shit.

Makes me wonder why I moved to London from Manchester coz it was cool living there too....local shops closing down left, right and centre; old people not getting the services they need; kids on bikes breaking into cars; fights in all the local pubs; petrol stations being burned down by kids...who obviously were getting bored of their TVs in their rooms; hearing people say "I don't mind black people as long as they don't live next door to me"; yep Manchester is cool too.

So, as part of sexing up the UK I would like to add that not only is it wonderful so many great perks, but it's also cool.

COOL BRITANNIA.....ooops it's been used already hasn't it?

Oh this is so much fun...........!

Larissa

:lecture: Education-
They haven't dumbed down GCSEs and "A" Levels. Behaviour in the classroom is excellent. Teachers aren't leaving the profession in droves as they love spending all their free time planning and marking. Children aren't getting sent home from school because the staffing levels in schools are great!

Youth
They're a credit to our nation - you'd never catch them shagging in the park across the road, or urinating on the reciever of the nearest telephone box. Britain doesn't have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe and people don't take drugs in clubs. They are so just so polite. I'm really looking forward to raising my children here - why go to Oz? Sure, it's got sun, but haven't we had a great summer!

Wilf

Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner, that I love London so
Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner, that I think of her wherever I go
Get a funny feeling inside of me, just walking up and down
Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner, that I love London Town

Go on, Vee, give it a go. It's in your blood and you can't escape it.

Wilf

LONDON -

Delight-on-Thames is what I calls it. The very warmth of the people is intoxicating, the sort of things missed by the casual eye: an exchanged glance, a shared laugh, a secret sign between two strangers on a tube that says "this bloke is carrying cash." A place where children can still be like they were in centuries past - robbing old people and buggering about. A safe repository for the most exquisite items of world culture, free from the attacks of invading hordes, and largely untroubled by even a few visitors a week. London - free to all, free to air, free to a pound.

Vee

I think I've given it a fair enough go, but only time will tell Wilf. See what happens after being in Australia for a while. Maybe you are right....maybe you are wrong. Maybe when I get older and my children (if I ever have any) are grown up then maybe I will come back to London. Maybe not. Maybe I will never be able to have children and in 5?10?15? years time I will be bored of the "Aussie way of life" and want to come back to good ol' (???) London Town. Who knows?

I'm going to try to escape it though.....Escape from UK. Think it will be a blockbuster hit?

V

Wilf

See if my homage to London does it then? (see above)

It's not everyone's cup of tea, as they say, but you have done a fair stretch and perhaps your sentence is over. Appropriate analogy, given your destination. For me, it is home, and where I will die. Even after all these years, I still feel like I own it every time I walk down the streets, and so when someone says to me "How can you go back? It has changed", I say "Thank god for that - it used to be terrible."

I think it will be a hit, as long as you don't cast that bloody Kurt Russell in it or if you do, kill him off quick. Have him fall out of the helicopter at the beginning, impaled on the top of westminster cathedral, and you can do one of those comedy looks on his face, like Norman Wisdom used to do, and then I will wear my whistle to the premiere (as long as it's not in that dead and alive hole Oz).

Vee

A lot of people in Canada (my parents are ex-pats and most of their friends are too) say the UK has changed....but they say it has changed for the worse. Ach well, to each his own. Maybe I've just had too much of London/big city and should try to live somewhere else...but this is my one chance at Australia so I'm gonna take - for better or worse. Have been spending a lot of time recently in the Forest of Dean and both me and the other half really like it....maybe we will try there if we come back from Australia.

I was born in London but I don't know if I want to die here. If I didn't have any money and ended up in a little council flat on the ground floor with no bars on the windows then life would be tough. You see a lot of old, lonely people in London who look very frail. All it would take is some knob who is riding their bike on the sidewalk to knock them over and that would be it. Care in the Community? Isn't working dude. Damn, forgot to add that to my sexing up the UK manifesto.

If you are lucky enough to have money and be old in the UK then you could probably have quite a nice life.

Now for this movie...I was thinking of having Kylie play the lead part....me.....coz we look so much alike. Can't stand Kurt Russell so was thinking of having Eric Cantona play the lead male.....after he's shed a few pounds that is. Perhaps you could sing the song you quoted above? It would be great for the soundtrack......!!

V

mr mover

I cannot wait , my son i have stocked up on tea chests, in anticipation of your forth coming move.... MM

hevs

The thing that i love about visiting London is that when you get home and cleanse your face, the cotton wool is BLACK! oh and when you blow your nose, the snot in the tissue is black too!:scared: :scared: (i know its gross, but its true!)

Wilf

I am not yet sure if I should have you in for my move old boy. A lot of your messages have been very angry of late and, as I said before, I do not want you getting out of hand, turning green, and slinging my gear around, just because I have not got sugar for your lads' teas. I have also seen that you have become very desperate to defend Oz at all costs when it is being knocked for a laugh. Don't get me wrong, I know more than most why living here makes you defensive - the party is over for Oz, we both know that - but I am concerned what a strain it is putting on you. The last thing I need is a law suit from you just because your ticker has given up the ghost whilst you were humping my books about. On the other hand, have you got any special deals for the over 60s? Three chests for two deals or free packing for half a day, say? If we can come to some arrangement, I may give you a shout.