Anastasia Beaverhausen

Is this normal, please tell me it is.

The weight of what we are doing is starting to creep up on me, and I am starting to have serious second thoughts.

Leaving my best mate is going to be really hard, and every time I think about it I start to well up, yet if we are still sat in the same pub, and the same table in a years time, I know I will feel like I am missing out on something.

The house is close to going on the market, this is our first home and we have out a lot of work into it to make it what it is. If we werent going then we would move anyway as its too small now we are a family, but the thought of selling it is horrid.

I have a mainly phone relationship with my mum, and that will continue when we get over there, however she wont be 2 hours down the road anymore. What if Dan and I row, I will have nowhere to escape to. The funny thing is, I have never run down there after a row, so why am I so worried about that now.

The visa is imminent. AFP checks have gone to DIMIA and I should hear any day, and am honestly excited, but panic is starting to set in.

Please tell me you all go through this. I know we are doing the right thing, but leaving everything here is going to be much harder than I thought.

God, why cant this be easy?

peppi

We all go through this Im sure...only just the other day my husband said to me "where am I gona go if we fall out...!" althought he doesnt "go" anywhere now..Ive got 5 weeks to go and only yesterday I was walking down my street thinking I shant be doing this much longer and it felt odd. I also have a habit of walking outside the house and looking at it and feeling sad..Its the first home of my own and Ive been here 10 years and feels like a safe haven for me...BUT...if I dont go and try it I know I shall kick myself with what ifs...One of my first prioritys over there is to get out and make new friends although I shall greatly miss my old ones. My old friend who lives up country came down last nite with fella in tow. Only second time my husband had met them. When they went he said its a shame we are going,I said why..? He said cos I like them...well there will be new people in Oz to meet that we shall like also Im sure. And hopefully my old friends will get over for a visit..Chin up..dont worry. Its been too much hard work up til now just to throw it all away. Grasp the oppotunity...You can always come back if you dont like it...

All the best Pep

PS I constantly feel sick with panic at the moment but I think thats normal

Mr. Ee

Hope it is normal 'cos that is exactly where I am right now!!!

Our med request came through and I thought "great", then the visa arrived and again I thought "great", we put the house on the market and I thought "hope this will be great", but now we are actually really planning and looking into how soon we can move "great" isn't the first word that comes to mind!!!

We have two small children and I am used to being busy with my friends and I am concerned to say the least as to how it will be over there, miles from friends and family. At this point it isn't Oz that I am worried about but what I am leaving behind! Sydney had better be good!?!?!

Guess as some point you just have to get on with it and worry about the rest later!!!



Mrs Ee ( Not Mr Ee - he can't wait to go - keeps wearing shorts to practise for the hot weather etc.)

rangersman

Keep going, hold on to your dream, emotions come and go. It's hard to leave but I think it's harder to live with regrets. It's hard when you realise that you are seeing friends and family for the last time in a long time but it's not forever.
Do this for yourself and your family, you will make new friends and lots of folk are in the some boat over there so lots wanting to making friends.
Keep your chin up, thinking of you.
Nicola

Anastasia Beaverhausen

That pretty much sums up how I feel most of the time, but for the last week doubts have been creeping in.

(note to self, sort yourself out and dont be such a worrier)

bridiej

I think it's normal, especially when you get to the point of things like putting the house on the market - seeing that "for sale" sign suddenly makes it all seem real somehow!

Wait until it says "sold" and you're still waiting for news - they'll take you away in a paddy wagon (typing this from my padded cell) LOL!

coxfamuk

This is perfectly normal. We sold our house yesterday (and we haven't even lodged our visa application - although that is imminent) and I have been up since 3am thinking OMG are we doing the right thing. I LOVE our house and if we weren't moving to australia, we would not be moving. Hubby and I walked down the road for a bit last night and I actually cried at the thought of leaving our neighbours (whom I hardly ever see, never mind talk to).

Emigrating is HUGE. It is a rollercoaster and going to Australia more so because they make you work damn hard for that visa, you are unable to completely plan until that visa is in your passport! Hang in there, think of it as a massive adventure and it doesn't have to be forever. You are going to havea wonderful life over there and it is going to be great.

Best wishes,

Sarah

bridiej

We're the same, love our house, thought we'd be taken out in wooden boxes when we moved in as we never wanted to move again, get on really well with our neighbours who are gutted that we're going!

BUT you cant take it with you unfortunately...

Fiona&malc

I never had second thoughts as such, i panicked a bit when the for sale sign went up, and i was really sad at leaving my house that we'd lived in for the last 10 years, and my neighbours who the majority were close friends !!! it was only on the day we were leaving, ie, 10 mins before we were about to leave for the airport, i thought, why are we doing this, i could see how upset we were making everyone, and i felt like such a shit for doing it, but at the back of my mind, i still knew that at that time, we were doing the right thing. 7 months down the line, im still glad we did it.

You'll be fine, it really is an emotional rollercoaster from start to finish, but if you really want to do it, then youve got to give it your best shot, and if it doesnt work out, then you can still come back, you dont have to turn your key in to live in the UK remember, its only a flight home. If it doesnt work out and you did come back then at least you had the guts to do it in the first place.

I wish you all the best im sure everything will work out fine for you

Anastasia Beaverhausen

It certainly does help having somewhere like this site where you can vent. Thanks.

Fiona&malc

Its a comfort to know that you are not alone, and that you are not a complete raving looney after all, and that there are other people going through, or have been through the same things
dont know what i'd do without this site now

Storini

Second, third, fourth... thoughts are inevitable, and good in a way as your conscious and unconscious mind struggle to reconcile the delight at new opportunities with the natural fear of the unknown. Mood swings are you, until it's all over!

Make no mistake, you will be changed by the process: but this change will be for the better.

manxfamily

Perfectly normal I am sure, after all it is probably one of the biggest risks you have done in your life. A very big step to take, especially if you are laden with family members, no job lined up, schools to find etc etc.

But on the bright side, you have planned for it and dreamed of it, just think back to the first few weeks when you started the ball rolling, I bet you could sleep with excitement and all your thoughts all of the day were based around the Australia thing! I know we were like that. Well that is soon to be a reality!!

Apart from anything else you have probably gone through so much and put in so much effort over the last few years that to not go and give it a try now would be sacrilege. You owe it to yourself to try the dream.

Don’t get me wrong, all these positive comments I am making do not wholly reflect my attitude as even I have bad days and wonder if I am doing the right thing, but without trying I will never know – so I'm going, Ill see you when I get there!!

coxfamuk

[QUOTE=Fiona&malc]it was only on the day we were leaving, ie, 10 mins before we were about to leave for the airport, i thought, why are we doing this, i could see how upset we were making everyone, and i felt like such a shit for doing it,
QUOTE]

I think this is the case with us. All our friends keep saying how much they will miss us and our family too. Most of our friends were friends of ours in South Africa, where we grew up. Slowly, over the last 8 years, they have come to live here as well, and funnily enough settled quite close to us. It is weird to think of leaving them and we do feel like a shit for doing it. But as you say, you just have to think of all that you will gain and remember the world is a small place and your good friends will always be there. Try to think of all the new wonderful friends you are going to make.

cammym

It is only natural to be worried.

When we were in Sydney for job interviews last year we kept thinking "can we do this, is it right for the kids etc". However, when it looked like we would not get the job and our dream maybe over we were gutted.

The job came good though.

We now have our visas, have offers on the house, just waiting for the chain to be complete. First to sell wins our house! We were both nervous and v.stressed recently until we thought the house sale would fall through and we couldn't go. Then again we realised how lucky we are to have the chance to go and that we really want to go, maybe not forever but for a great adventure. We are also lucky that our children are so keen to go to Australia and keep saying, when will we be there!

Moral of the story, when you are feeling sick and wondering if you are making the right decision imagine being told you could not go. How would you feel then - this may put things into perspective a little.

PS we are still a bit worried though!!