jensteve

Has anyone noticed how when you arrive in OZ after a few months the friends you left behind seem to have less and less in common with you, and eventually you don't care if they ring or not?
Our friends left behind seem to be going round in circles with the same old problems, and seem to be blinkered to outside advice etc, and I am sure our growing love of the Aussie lifestyle is just too laidback to be really bothered in their minor temper tantrums back over in the UK.
Well go on, how are long distance friendships doing, are they still as good as ever or do you feel something has changed?
I would even go as far to say I am not sure if some of our old pals arrived on holiday I would find them remotely interesting!

Thanks all Jenny

mlbonner

IMO its just a really good way to separate the real friends, from people you just use to know and do things with

moose1

we know exactly where you are coming from. we moved to france 2 and half yrs ago and at first everyone kept in touch with e.mails and regular phone calls, gradually these contacts got less and less and now we can go months without hearing from anyone. although its surprising how every yr around this time we suddenly get popular as people start thinking about holidays and where is good value for money (ie it only costs us to get there and then we get free board and food). but like you say we have moved on in our lives and now these same people who where such good friends we now feel as though we have absolutly nothing in common with any more.
the problem with moving to another country tho is we now have itchy feet again and this time i think it will be a bit too far for cheap holidays, although i suppose it really will show us who our true friends are.

pako

hhmmm not in Oz just yet, but left the Wirral 10 years ago and only go back to see my parents. Have lost contact with all my friends from up there. I found that the ones who never left have very small minds and have no grip on the real world! So perhaps its a wirral thing!!

As for my friends in london I will miss them dearly when we leave in Novemeber, but as a lot of them are kiwis and Aussies and I doubt I'll lose touch with them after being friends for so many years!

CadburysFingers

I think that about sums it up for most people. Our phone calls and emails have dwindled to almost a standstill from friends in the UK. Funny how the people you thought were your best friends are the first to drop off, and the ones you could take or leave still keep in touch. I like many others on here put most of it down to jealousy. You have got off your arse and made a better life for yourself and family, and they havent. A lot of people cant cope with that, so find it easier to ignore you instead.

..........once more with feeling!

Shelley29

Not in Oz yet and friends who we considered to be very close to and went out with a lot, kids same age, lots in common etc etc have dropped us. They have even hinted, in so many words - but I'm not daft I can read between the lines, they will never come and see us. They don't phone, so you phone make arrangements to go out, they cancel, you know the usual. A bit upsetting at first, but hey ho, never mind we'll get over it.

As you say, you get off your backside and decide to make a better life for yourself and your family and they resent you for it.

Anyway, who cares. They can suit themselves.

Good luck to all.

Shelley xx

angela&rob

Don't have any friends so I'm alright

boom_meringue

You're from Essex so no surprise there

We are both from Cornwall and moved to the M4 corridor over 5 years ago and found that most people don't bother making an effort after a couple of months if at all. If we didn't bother making the effort then we would quickly fall out of touch with people and we are only a 4 hour drive away, we haven't seen or heard from one of Clare's bridesmaids since our wedding 18 months ago.

I'm looking forward to getting to Perth, I think it will really show who the friends are and who couldn't really care less.

Don't you find that when you do make the effort to call people then the conversation always runs the same course? - who's shagging who, how pissed off they are with their jobs/partners/kids and how things never change for the people that don't move away from their roots?

bondipom

My friends are moving along with life and careers and doing quite nicely. It was good to see how much one of them had changed so much for the better.

boom_meringue

I've obviously got boring friends then!

DianneH68

I think this is the case whenever you move around, and not necessarily abroad.
Since I left home to go to Uni 14 years ago, I have never lived in one city for more than three years (all in the UK though).
Consequently I don't have a wide circle of friends. When you move your life and interests move on and you meet new people who you have much more in common with (obviously, because they are the ones who you start to share your life with!)
The oldest friends I have I have only known for maybe six years.
And as for keeping in touch with school friends
I can't believe people who manage this. I stayed in touch with a couple until around the time I left Uni, but after that I found I had absolutely nothing in common with them at all!

sel

When I updated my friends with our visa process recently, I caught my one mate rolling her eyes at the other. It was only then that I realised that they don't really believe that we will go, even if we get the visa or thats how I perceived it. It was also at that moment I felt the determination rise even more in me (if thats possible) to make it work out for us. I wouldn't mind if I was constantly going on about Australia but I'm not cos I know I would bore the pants off them, I just wanted to share my good news cos I was feeling really happy and thought they would be happy for us too

I had also thought that I would miss them loads cos we do have a good laugh when we are together but suddenly I feel very different ....

bridiej

Dont worry, you can share anything you like on here, we're not bored!!!

sel

Thank you .... I 've always thought this place was a "godsend" ... nice to have like minded peeps to chat too

rapitts

yeah life works weird ways.

I think most people back home dont like to hear that life is better and the stories of how you are enjoying yourself.