Larissa

Once upon a time, there lived a lovely lady called Hev. She was the long suffering wife of a rather deranged chap, by the name of HUP.
However, Hev had one very worrying vice. It all started, when as a girl, she began collecting stickers...

Badge

(she threw away the ones of badgers and wookies as badgersmount was getting bored of it all)

but she was really in to Aussie ones.

Larissa

it got to the point where Hev would do ANYTHING to get hold of the highly desirable, limited edition, yellow aussie sticker....

steandleigh

She stickered in the morning, she stickered at night, those aussie stickers were here, there and everywhere. She covered the walls, the floors, the doors and the ceilings, there was nowhere left for her to sticker. then she had an ingenious idea.......

Larissa

she would persuade her fruitcake husband to part with the family dosh, to obtain her

WBB

.....lifelong dream of owning her own inflatable sheep, then as if by magic a tall handsome welsh man appeared and offered her the said sheep, but there was a catch..........

Larissa

they could only elope together if... welshboy's nervous pet pooch could tag along.

WBB

.....this was too much and there was a sudden nervous breakdown, she was shipped off to spend a couple of nights in the bed next to frank bruno, know what i mean arry.!
then from the next room there came a voice.....

Badge

YES YES YES YES Oh My GOD

Pollyana

"Who was in the next room" she wondered, sliding out of bed and pressing her ear to the wall to hear more.....

HUP

"Ah my pussy. My precious pussy" It was Ceri. She had gone quite mad over those cruel posts about cats

WBB

she stroked her pussy untill it purred with satisfaction but then came a shocking revalation...

HUP

It was badgers curled up in her lap. "What the f**k are you doing in here"

"I need help those people on expats have been making fun of me for no good reason and now I'm to be wed my intended thinks I'm a freak"

"Yes they can be quite ruthless can't they. So its not true what they say?"

Pollyana

"cos I had heard that you liked to lurk in linen baskets, amongst frilly underwear? If thats not true, how DO you spend your evenings, oh little black furry one?"

Badge

"but there's a hole in my bucket dear garrat, dear garrat"

said Badgers