glittababe

Haven't needed to put a thread on for a while, but need some advice. We've settled in really well where we live (didn't expect to with our initial probs). Get on well with our neighbours who are mostly elderly. To 'celebrate' our arrival, one of the neighbours is organising a formal dinner party for us (yes we're truely horrified). Whilst its such a sweet gesture, we just don't do dinner parties with the neighbours, in fact I don't think I've ever been to one, or had neighbours for that matter! How do you politely decline, when they've gone to such an effort? How many excuses can we come up with? Do we, or don't we? We don't want to offend anyone and they really are nice people. We're just not ready for aussie socialising. We initially thought it was a ploy to get our life histories out of us, however I'm reliably informed that our wonderful kids have already spilled the beans on our darkest secrets (don't you just love em), so it can't be that. Maybe I just don't trust people!

The neighbours have been good, we've been away a lot recently and they've put our bins out, taken them back in, mowed our lawns, kept an eye on the house (probably sniffed my frilly's on the washing line)! Whilst we're grateful we're not party people or in a party mood! How on earth do we get out of this one?

galloping gaijin

I'd go, but if they ask you to put the car keys in a bowl, then make your excuses and leave .

Would they get the 'huff' if you declined - might be handy having some good locals to rely on.

Tumbleweed

If they're going to such effort it would be rude to decline and you never know you might enjoy yourself.

If you find you don't enjoy it then don't do it again, but try opening your mind to a new experience and you might surprise yourself. As for not being in a party mood, I've often found that I enjoy myself more when I've not really been wanting to go to something than when I've been looking forward to it. Would it really kill you to spend a few hours in their company?

Is there any reason why you "don't do dinner parties" or socialise with your neighbours?

renth

Drop a couple of tabs of acid just before turning up for the meal.

woodring

If you are not party people why did you decide to go to oz???

Seriously, I suggest you bite the bullet and accept with good grace.

Entertaining neighbours and friends is probably the no 2 social activity in OZ
behind watching sport. Make the most of it I'm sure you will grow to like it.

Mrs Jackaroo

I would go - just this once. During the course of the evening you can probably get across the fact that you're not party people but that it was nice for them to do this 'one off' party to welcome you. If they've made the effort then I think the least you can do is accept in all honesty.

We were in a similar situaion last Friday - were invited around our Aussie friends house for a meal and a few drinks but we'd had a very stressful day that day (medicals for PR at Paramatta then travelling back in rush hour traffic with a daughter crying all the way because she'd missed her first Aussie School Disco!!) so we would rather have gone home to an early night - we made the effort though and were glad we did. We got to meet their friend so thats another 'friend' we can add to our list! Its only one night and no doubt you'll be needing their help with the house in future again. You never know you might enjoy it!

Tumbleweed

Exactly

rossifumi

I have heard it all now.

Oh and washing line, don't flatter yourself!

Tumbleweed

LOL

gobbyjock

Personally I would just go - it`s only a couple of hours out of your life (you might actually enjoy yourself). If you go and its that bad you could always just get really drunk and fall asleep with you face in the soup - that would ensure you didn`t get invited back!!

Clippy

In my opinion, there's no way you can 'politely' decline this offer - seems they've gone to a hell of a lot of trouble to help you settle in and I'd think they'd be very offended if you turned them down.

It would be my husbands worst nightmare as he's so shy but he'd still go and enjoy it no doubt.

brisnick

Don't be so bloody miserable. Go!

TeresaG

It sounds like they have gone to a lot of trouble for this. I'd go as its a nice gesture from them and you would probably offend them if you didn't. It sounds as though they've made you really welcome. You'll probably surprise yourself and have a great time.

rossifumi

Do your neighbours a favour, don't go! They'll appreciate it.

They're probably just feeling sorry for you.

herrchook

pmsl

Seriously though, it sounds like they're genuinely goos people so it would be rude to decline this offer. As was said before, during the evening, make it known that you like to keep yourselves to yourselves but that you're delighted to have such good neighbours. You could always say something like "we might not always come to the neighbourhood parties, but if any of you ever need anything, please feel free to ask" that way you're being friendly but letting them know your situation.

It's handy to have good neighbours, especially for the type of thing you've mentioned such as making the place look lived in in your absence. Also, you just never know when you might need their help!

Have a glass of wine, grin and bear it - it's just a couple of hours.

Have fun,

Gill