Pollyana

Good little vicar's daughter me, I head off to the local Anglican church for "Carols and Midnight Mass" on Christmas Eve.
3 old dears, me, the vicar and the organist - by the time we got to halfway throught the Mass we had got up to 20 people, but it took time!
Layreader/curate arrived in the middle - looking so much like Dawn French in the Vicar of Dibley, that I nearly laughed aloud!

The vicar took his seat - apparently carols were made to be sung sitting down - put his feet up - and muttered " number 211, verse 1 & 5"......what happened to "Hello and Welcome"? Perhaps not worth it for just 4 of us!
He and I sang, the organist played a few wrong notes, and the old dears waved their sticks.
"Number 213, verses 1,3 5" but the organist piped up that he didn't like number 3, so we just sang 1 & 5.
I reckon we got through 15 carols - or parts of carols, all disjointed cos we didn't sing a single one in its entirety. He hust went through the book in numerical order, till he ran out of carols! Some were a little tricky as there were pages torn out of my hymn book And as new people came in, the vicar would leap from his seat and rush down the aisle to tell them what we were singing.......trouble is, with only two verses, we had finished before they found the right page! Most of them didn't sing anyway, just sat and chatted.
Next year I might try the cathedral - I'm not sure I could cope with this experience again!!

jad n rich

We went the week before christmas it was called carols by candlelight. No candles a group selling fluro blue red and green glo sticks got you at the gate told you candles are dangerous and banned and sold you glow sticks. As it was outside most had brought food, not a picnic but mounds of people eating KFC, big rooter, burgers the air stank not of candle wax but aussie junk food and mozzie repellant. Still trying to keep a dignified look on me face we sat down to watch the nativity, the fully gowned and robed vicar introduced 30 x 12 year olds who pranced out wearing scanty leotards and bright red lipstick. By now rich and I are giggling but the last straw was when the nativity brought out the screaming and cackling wicked witch

Yes sometimes you do have to embrace the differences

Pollyana

A witch in the Nativity! Now thats revolutionary! And how surreal - carols by candlelight without the candles! Had my dad in stitches with my story - I think yours will go down just as well - I'll suggest the C of E do away with candles and introduce hotdogs, I can just see his face now

tonyk38

That's hilarious Polly! You ought to write a book and call it 'A Year in Aus'. Oops sort of been done already for Provence, but yours would be miles better! I'll buy it!