madmancunian

You won't stay single in Aus for long with these great chat-up lines...

MadM

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Hello, I've got big feet.

Lie to me, Pinnochio, lie to me

You've been a bad, bad girl. Go to my room!

Is it that cold outside or are you just smuggling Tic-Tacs?

Inheriting $80 million doesn't mean much when you've got a weak heart.

This was printed on a card given to lassies.
'Hi, I'm the quiet, reserved type. Is there any chance of hopping in bed with you tonight?
I'm not as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was.
You don't have to say Yes, just smile!
PS. If the answer is No, please return this card as they are expensive."

Pick-uper: Do you sleep on your stomach?
Pick-upee: No
Pick-uper: Well, do you mind if I do?

Did you want to have sex with someone tonight, or is it just me?

You know you want it

Theres a party in my pants and it's in honour of you baby

Your eyes are like the stars....too far apart!

There's plenty of fish in the ocean.... but you're the only one I'd like to mount over the fireplace!!

If I could change the alphabet I'd put U and I together.

We could go through the usual process of me getting your phone number not calling you for a few days then catching up next week, but to be honest my mobile phone battery is flat. So why don't we skip the boring bits and get down to the sex part?

Do you mind if I snatch a kiss.....or vice-versa

Hi I'm Rip Van Winkle, we made a pact to meet here 200 years ago?

Hey baby, after we're finished tonight even your NEIGHBOURS will be having a cigarette.....

So.....how am I going so far?

(Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of those wet clothes.

Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

I'm going to give you 50c so you can call your mother to tell her you won't be coming home tonight.

Girl, you must be tired 'cause you've been running through my mind all day?

I'm going to have sex with you tonight no matter what so you might as well be there

Excuse me, have we shagged yet?

Try the reverse psychology on a guy who asks for your number. Tell him there is no point because guys never call. He'll insist and then you refuse. In the end 'relent' and he'll ring the next day to ask you out to prove you wrong.

I'm no Fred Flintstone but I bet I can make you bed rock.

Him: "I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now." (Put your ear to watch) "It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?."
Her: "No" (probably)
Him: "Oh..." (Tap your watch a few times) "Ah, that's the problem... my watch is an hour fast!"

20 bucks says you say no

Hi, I'm Brad Pitt

Hi, I'm not Brad Pitt, who aren't you?

Most guys here are scum. Most guys here just want to tell their mates how many girls they've picked up this week. But with me, you're a member, not a number.

Would you like to see my Weapon of Mass Seduction?

Trevglas

And Aussie foreplay:

"Just turn the light off will ya?"

ABCDiamond

That makes me feel old !! Last time I heard that it was only 5p !!