argonaut

Been lurking in this forum for a while now but now need an objective view from everyone on a BIG dilemma I'm facing.

My problem is that I'm 36 years old, British (brought up in London) but my wife's Australian, 29 years old (brought up in Sydney). We've lived in London for the last 7 years since getting married, but my wife's been getting more homesick each year (parents and sister in Oz) and is now insisting on moving to Melbourne (where her parents are building a house)!

I am a Chartered Accountant (tax specialist) and therefore will be paid a cr@p salary in Melbourne. I'm 36. We have a nice house (though nothing palatial lke you can get in Oz!), two nice cars and I have a well paid job with a final salary pension scheme. Now is NOT the time for me to be uprooting and trying to start over!!

My wife will be a qualified primary school teacher soon and would earn maybe $40k in Oz, me maybe $70k. If we have a $250k mortgage (no kids yet), is this enough to have a COMFORTABLE life with a UK holiday every other year? I don't want to have to struggle financially at this stage of my life and what happens if we DO have kids and she stops work for a few years? Also, I'd lose a lucrative UK pension. In the UK, if she didn't work, we'd still manage quite well (still run both cars and still have the nice house).

Advice please - I'm getting depressed about the arguments with the wife, but she misses her family and obviously can't help that.

Thanks for reading, anyway.

Larissa

Hi argonaut
Are you sure you'd lose your Uk pension? It may be worth checking with Alan Collet at Gomatilda.com

argonaut

...I'm pretty sure that to get the 'final salary' pension you need to be working for the same company at the point of retirement. Otherwise, there's no final salary with which to benchmark your pension.

I don't think there's a big fund that I can take away with me. I've only been working for the company for 3 years.

downunderpom

Sounds to me like you're just starting to build your retirement fund, so what does it matter if you lose three years? What makes you think that you're still going to be working for THAT company in another 29 years? Sorry, Argo, but I think you're looking at this with a very short term view.

You're an accountant, so work the numbers: where will you be in the UK in 29 years, as opposed to where you will be in Oz in 29 years.

When you've done all that, throw all that nonsense away, and ask yourself the really important question - is your marriage worth keeping your wife happy? Then get started on the migration paperwork.

Larissa

If you're planning on having kids, I'd say there's nothing like having a supportive family nearby - wish I had my parents around! Perhaps your wife is feeling this more if her brooding instincts are kicking in. I'd also say that I think that teaching seems to be better in Aus than in the uk.

argonaut

...
I suppose you're right to a certain extent, but as an Accountant, i HAVE to take a prudent view and in the short to medium term, employers don't like older employees with NO Ozzy tax experience - I'd be starting at the bottom of the ladder again at the age of 36! That will be 10 years of UK experience down the drain.

Of course I want my wife to be happy....but HERE!!! No one's answered whether financially we'd be struggling in Oz or not?

downunderpom

On $110K? You'd be earning double what most families earn. As for losing ten years of tax experience, how can you lose experience? It's always with you. As for starting at the bottom again, I doubt that. Anyone with ten years experience is going to get a better start in a job that a newbie.

And, if I can be blunt, it sounds like you just don't want to move out of your comfort zone. If that's the case, then admit it. No-one will think less of you. Except maybe your wife..... After all, you've had it your way for seven years. Maybe it's her turn?

argonaut

...you could well be right. Food for thought anyway! Thanks for being blunt though - at 36 it's very difficult to get out of my 'comfort zone'.

downunderpom

That's the trouble with asking for advice on this forum - you don't always hear what you want to hear!!

Good luck.

Megalania

Think a bit harder - a job / business in both UK and Aus? Surely some UK firms in Aus needing help?

downunderpom

And vice versa - Aus firms wanting to move into UK / Europe?

Megalania

Get the trouble and strife to help hunt through the possibilities?

Vicky88

You would have no problems getting a decent job in Australia with your qualifications. As for the $70k salary, remember you will probably get extras on top of that ie. 9% superannuation, plus other benefits your negotiate.

If you can't live comfortably on your combined salaries with that size mortage I would say you would need to review your expenditure. However, as an accountant I am sure that you are shrewd with your money.

Sounds like you are looking for an excuse not to go because life is about much more than how much pension you will get. Who knows if you will even be around to enjoy it.

Best of luck with your decision.

Mubo_Guy

From what I've observed if she is feeling like this now without kids the homesickness will get even worse when that first baby comes along.

I've seen ex-pats who were previously happy where they were suddenly experience extreme homesickness at the arrival of bub. This is because it is an extra special time between the new mother and her mum (and sisters). It is a time of great tiredness and helplessness and where family support is critical. And with you presumably going back to work after the baby has come she could be at risk for post natal depression.

My cousin and his wife (the Aussie) have just moved to Melbourne - she struggled for a few years after they started their family but couldn't go much more.
Just something else to consider - sorry!

Rachael

bondipom

Maybe Alan Collett might have some advice as far as career opportunities go. Another option is specialist tax advice to emigrants and or as Mega suggested international business.

In this new age of outsourcing finding the niche is critical otherwise a nice fellow who earns 1 tenth of your salary will be doing your job anyway.