Joke Time
Apr 26th 2005, 9:57 am
#16
Born to be wild....
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Northants to Brisbane.
Posts: 5,450
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Jane and Russ Middleton
Weedon and you????? funny we are hoping to go to Brisbane too 
Apr 26th 2005, 5:44 pm
#17
A New Day at Mid-Night...
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Away Away From Home...
Posts: 553
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Ransi
Any jokes??
Im bored...
Im bored...
here you go:1) Project Manager is a Person who thinks Nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
2) Developer is a Person who thinks a single woman cannot deliver a baby in nine months.
3) Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4) Marketing manager is a person who thinks I can deliver a child whether a man and woman is available or not.
5) Resource optimisation team thinks I don't need a man or woman, i'll still produce a child with zero resources.
6) Documentation team thinks I don't care whether the child is delivered, i'll just document 9 months.
7) QA Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce baby.
8) Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
--
- Muks
Dont Fear, Just Live Right...
Apr 26th 2005, 6:25 pm
#18
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 4,235
Re: Joke Time
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
Apr 26th 2005, 7:03 pm
#19
A New Day at Mid-Night...
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Away Away From Home...
Posts: 553
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Hels
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
Apr 26th 2005, 7:22 pm
#20
Cheeky member
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: West Side
Posts: 16,204
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Hels
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 I'm a 6 feet tall, 180-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Yes, I am Blonde and Yes...I am female....
Apr 26th 2005, 7:24 pm
#21
Born to be wild....
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Northants to Brisbane.
Posts: 5,450
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Ransi
Best one so far...
I agree Ransi Miles better than the rest, including my poor effort,
Now see who can upstage that one....Any Takers????
Apr 26th 2005, 7:32 pm
#22
A New Day at Mid-Night...
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Away Away From Home...
Posts: 553
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by Ben wanting brisbane life
I agree Ransi Miles better than the rest, including my poor effort,
Now see who can upstage that one....Any Takers????
Now see who can upstage that one....Any Takers????
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. "The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years."
Apr 26th 2005, 7:37 pm
#23
Cheeky member
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: West Side
Posts: 16,204
Re: Joke Time
Originally Posted by pandya_m
old PJ(poor joke) but works some times:
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. "The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years."
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. "The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years."
worked for me
