How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
#16
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,206
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
Hi!
So, I’m hopefully (depending on visas/exemptions/flights) going to be moving to Brisbane in March or April to start a 2 year research project in a hospital.
However, I’m really struggling to tell my mum about this. I’m 23 and her oldest child, and have been back living at home since March this year, and we’ve got much closer since then than we were before.
I lived abroad for a year in the US as part of my undergrad degree, and things were fine then, but I’m so worried that she’ll react badly when I tell her about Australia. I think she’ll be worried about how far away I am, how neither of us will be able to travel to see each other easily in the current environment, and that I’ll end up staying there permanently (which is a possibility). I just keep avoiding the conversation but I know time is running out and I need to tell her.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life. I suppose I could do with some advice from people who’ve had this conversation with their parents, especially while living with them, and perhaps from people who have children my age - what would your response and concerns be?
thank you
E
So, I’m hopefully (depending on visas/exemptions/flights) going to be moving to Brisbane in March or April to start a 2 year research project in a hospital.
However, I’m really struggling to tell my mum about this. I’m 23 and her oldest child, and have been back living at home since March this year, and we’ve got much closer since then than we were before.
I lived abroad for a year in the US as part of my undergrad degree, and things were fine then, but I’m so worried that she’ll react badly when I tell her about Australia. I think she’ll be worried about how far away I am, how neither of us will be able to travel to see each other easily in the current environment, and that I’ll end up staying there permanently (which is a possibility). I just keep avoiding the conversation but I know time is running out and I need to tell her.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life. I suppose I could do with some advice from people who’ve had this conversation with their parents, especially while living with them, and perhaps from people who have children my age - what would your response and concerns be?
thank you
E
Good luck with everything
#17
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2013
Location: Perth
Posts: 623
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
Hi!
So, I’m hopefully (depending on visas/exemptions/flights) going to be moving to Brisbane in March or April to start a 2 year research project in a hospital.
However, I’m really struggling to tell my mum about this. I’m 23 and her oldest child, and have been back living at home since March this year, and we’ve got much closer since then than we were before.
I lived abroad for a year in the US as part of my undergrad degree, and things were fine then, but I’m so worried that she’ll react badly when I tell her about Australia. I think she’ll be worried about how far away I am, how neither of us will be able to travel to see each other easily in the current environment, and that I’ll end up staying there permanently (which is a possibility). I just keep avoiding the conversation but I know time is running out and I need to tell her.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life. I suppose I could do with some advice from people who’ve had this conversation with their parents, especially while living with them, and perhaps from people who have children my age - what would your response and concerns be?
thank you
E
So, I’m hopefully (depending on visas/exemptions/flights) going to be moving to Brisbane in March or April to start a 2 year research project in a hospital.
However, I’m really struggling to tell my mum about this. I’m 23 and her oldest child, and have been back living at home since March this year, and we’ve got much closer since then than we were before.
I lived abroad for a year in the US as part of my undergrad degree, and things were fine then, but I’m so worried that she’ll react badly when I tell her about Australia. I think she’ll be worried about how far away I am, how neither of us will be able to travel to see each other easily in the current environment, and that I’ll end up staying there permanently (which is a possibility). I just keep avoiding the conversation but I know time is running out and I need to tell her.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life. I suppose I could do with some advice from people who’ve had this conversation with their parents, especially while living with them, and perhaps from people who have children my age - what would your response and concerns be?
thank you
E
#18
Just Joined
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2020
Posts: 12
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
I’m waiting for some final documents to come through this week and then can apply, but have done some research and it seems that if you apply for a travel exemption shortly after applying for the visa, they’re often granted at the same time - as most people applying for these visas wouldn’t actually be able to travel they’re not granting them quickly without exemptions (which I may not get, but do meet the criteria)
#19
Just Joined
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2020
Posts: 12
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
Well, you're not going forever why would you not talk to your mum about it? I'd hope my kids would let me know if they'd applied for a position overseas. Mine never asked permission, they just told me what they were doing and got on with it. But, then, I've never been a parent who kept their kids tied to their apron strings. We did the same to my parents - just told them we were going. If your 2 years extends into something else then at least she will have been used to you not being there for a while. You will miss important family things, you might even not be there should anything happen to your olds but if you are self sufficient and self reliant you should manage OK in a foreign country. I'm like Tomar, it was worse back in the day when there were aerogrammes and phone calls cost £1 a minute but you get on with it and stay connected however you can.
I agree it’s so much easier now to stay in touch and we did this while I was in the US, but then I was a 7 hour flight away without all the stuff going on right now!
#20
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
thank you - I suppose I’m nervous she’ll be upset or disappointed, especially as there are a few other stressful family things going on at the moment. I’m not asking her for permission, but I would really hope she can be supportive of it.
I agree it’s so much easier now to stay in touch and we did this while I was in the US, but then I was a 7 hour flight away without all the stuff going on right now!
I agree it’s so much easier now to stay in touch and we did this while I was in the US, but then I was a 7 hour flight away without all the stuff going on right now!
#21
Just Joined
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 1
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
Did you tell your mum in the end?
#22
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 702
Re: How to tell your parents you’re moving across the world?
I lived abroad for a year in the US as part of my undergrad degree, and things were fine then, but I’m so worried that she’ll react badly when I tell her about Australia. I think she’ll be worried about how far away I am, how neither of us will be able to travel to see each other easily in the current environment, and that I’ll end up staying there permanently (which is a possibility). I just keep avoiding the conversation but I know time is running out and I need to tell her.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life.
I’m certain that this is what I want to do, and although I am nervous about some things, overall I feel excited and ready to move onto the next chapter of my life.
When my wife and I were about to have our first child, I was nervous and excited in much the same way you describe. And my sister, younger but far more experienced in such matters (as a degree nurse in a children's hospital), took me aside and said, "your heart's in the right place, and given that, they're actually much harder to damage than you think".
I believe the same sentiment, and likely outcome from it, will apply to your mother, upon receiving news of your nascent move to Australia.
If it clearly makes sense for you, she will rally from any initial distress, and support it.