peterinblack

Anyone have advice on the easiest way to tell children they
are moving to oz not just for a holiday they are 10 & 6
would it be easier to just leave them behind (only joking)

peter

kris maynard

Hi Peter
We involved the kids from the start before we even applied for the TRA! Asked them what they thought about it all ,luckily they are really looking forward to it I have 3 girls 12/9 and 4 (the 4 year olds a bit young to understand)

Good Luck

Kris xx

shade8

Tell them straight away.Don't have to go into too much detail then just keep mentioning it every now and again.
The younger 2 no problem older one might be upset.but she will soon make friends.Not that she will think that no matter how many times you tell her.
Good luck.

Bix

You could just say you're going on a long flight on one of them big jets. Just don't tell them it's one way

No, irrespective of their reaction involve them all the way.

Jane and Russ Middleton

Hi Peter,
We involved the kids from the outset..... just explaining we had applied but just to prepare them for the big move ... It helped to have a trip there so they can understand where it is and have met some people ... also have connected up with others who have kids the same age who are doing the same. I have a girl of 10 and a boy of 7 although my boy is not keen (understatement of the year) he seems to have accepted that it is a possibility, plus they are organizing their own party :scared:
Jane x

Margaret2

Hi,

I'm having an awful time with my 14 year old, not wanting to go, it has been hell on earth and am sure will get worse as things get moving (still waiting on our visa). I know she will have a fit when it comes to selling the house. However I am still glad she knows about the whole thing and I can see a very and I mean very slow change of acceptance from her, not optimism just acceptance.

My 6 year old was copying her older sister on the not wanting to go trend............until last weekend where we went on the scottish meet, now she thinks its a fabulous idea as she will meet lots of new friends.

I can only hope and pray things will change when my 14 year old gets there, she is keen on gymnastics and have been emailing a club where the coach has been fabulous at reassuring her that she will be welcome in their club and how they have a great time training on the beach etc, god I owe that woman a pint!! Perhaps if they are interested in a sport you could also do this.

shade8

I don't envy you at all.A hard age to be bringing out.A few friends had problems with older children.But as long as once your here you are positive and not saying we will give it 6 months and see how things go.As they will play on that.You have to come out with the attitude its 2 years.And don't let them here you talking negative even if you are finding it hard once you get here.

Margaret2

Good advice, but too late I already said we would give it a year and if she is dreadfully unhappy then we will come back, but I did enforce it would be a year and I also spoke about the fact that it will be hard for us all hence the reason we need a year to try to make a go of things.

We also managed to link her up with a couple of girls who are age 12 and 14 and were also going to same part of aus as us, we all met a couple of times and I got on great with their mum....grrreat I hear you say, but even this didn't sway her, they are now in aus have also been talking to her on msn telling her how fab it is especially school, but no, nothing works....what to do....what to do?

shade8

YOu can't let her rule your life.She has her chose of where to live at 18 years of age.She will come round to the idea.Its a hard time for everyone even for those who are all for it.
So expect a bumpy ride.

Margaret2

thanx, must go, I've been on this bloody site all day it is so addictive, have a day off work and spent it in cyber land how sad am I?

shade8

Good luck and it does get easier so don't stress.

Sue2

Its hard to say, we told our from the start...we found it stressed out our 8yo a bit. I wish we told them a little down the line, like once we got the okay from the TRA. I wouldn't leave it until the last minute kids usually know when somethings going on.

All the best

Sue

Margaret2

See I said I'd go and guess what I'm still here, we did that Sue waited untill it was a little down the line as it does all take such a long time

Sandra

Easier to leave them behind!

We told ours at the onset, which turned out for the best as ended up having an earlier than planned move on a 457 first. Nine and 11 when we first chatted - just 12 and 9 when we moved and no they did not want to. We only talked about it being something Mum and Dad wanted to try and it would be a family adventure and we wanted them with us very much. We have found over the last 3.5 years here, we all talk more and include each other in decisions because of the honesty at the start.

It is a huge move and you need them on board - one personal bit of advice is tell them everything will not be perfect to start (if it is that is a bonus) if things are a bit tough then they know something isn't wrong just normal and need not add to the concerns kids might keep from you.

We never said that if they were not happy we would go home, we promised trips for each of them every two years and we put money aside to ensure we could keep our promise. Lucky for us we had that money. I know that might not be possible for some people.

My Father in Law is now very ill and we have to tell the children, so far I have told my eldest now 15 and he feels very guilty ?! The 13 year old may take a little longer, cause I am not sure how she will cope. I still have big moments of worry about being here and not closer to family. Honesty is the best policy at all times, the little buggers remember all those daft things you said for the best at the time! But they aslo remember we promised challenge and difference and we have that

Best of Luck

nicanjoe

We have three children a daughter 10 next month and two boys 7 and 5. The five year old doesn't really understand, and the 7 year old is thrilled, and desperate to see snakes, lizards and sharks (let's hope he's very disappointed!!!)
My oldest is very upset. We told them from the start and I told her not to worry until it was a definate go. Everytime any subject comes up that has a positive Australian spin on it, I mention it. My daughter competes in dance and I love the idea of connecting her with a dance studio in Perth! I told her we would be there for at least one year and to think of it as an exciting adventure, if we come home, no harm done, and if we stay she will hopefully have made some friends and settled in a bit by then. She had three new kids in her class this year and I asked her if all the kids were mean to them and made them feel left out and she said"no!, of course not, they're really nice, we all played together" etc etc. So, after a minute she realized that if she is the new kid, the others will probably be just as friendly to her, and that seemed to help a lot. In fact I think they all were quite excited to befriend the new kids.

nicanjoe