how do you tell perents your going to oz
#1
how do you tell perents your going to oz
i have got to do this tonight, and it's scaring me more than i would care to say .
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
#2
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by charlie brown
i have got to do this tonight, and it's scaring me more than i would care to say .
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
Mum Dad Im now a grown up, Im going to live in Australia so start saving for your trip over!!
Good Luck
Kris xx
#3
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,693
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by charlie brown
i have got to do this tonight, and it's scaring me more than i would care to say .
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
may be greater understanding/acceptance as time passes. Be firm in your mind what you want and where your'e going and why.
Dave
#4
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by charlie brown
i have got to do this tonight, and it's scaring me more than i would care to say .
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
why do they still put the fear of god into me when i have to tell them something important
God, I don't envy you
We told ours back in January before we started this whole process to give them enough time to get used to the idea. My parents were fine. Upset but fine as they understand completely why we want to go. Bu the IL's - that's another story. They sat quietly while we told them, and any questions they had we answered. Unfortunately they still haven't got their heads round the situation and now won't talk to us. But that is their problem and nothing we do or say makes any difference. They even had a go at us for telling them so far in advance. They asked why we hadn't told them until we had the visa, so they didn't know about it for so long. WTF! We can't win either way.
My advice is to sit them down, say the words, give them the reasons why, and make sure you've got answers for all their questions like "Why, When, What if, How" etc. And whatever you do, don't get caught up in emotional blackmail. Stick to your guns and don't back down.
Good Luck
Julie
P.S. Forgot to add that my IL's said "Well, don't expect us to visit you". I turned round and told them "That's fine, we'll just come and visit you instead". They had no answer to that. Any obstacles they came up with we knocked down, so be prepared to do the same.
Last edited by Juliecabs; Oct 5th 2005 at 11:04 am.
#5
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,375
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Tell your Dad you can get him Ashes tickets for the 2006/2007 series ...
It's a sweetner !
Not an easy one ... my parents still haven't come to terms with it fully and they were told in May 2003.
I think in our case, it's a mixture of heartbreak (Me, the wife and the grandkids going), slight jealously (they thought of doing the same over 30 years ago), business worries (I'm with Dad in a family business and he's not getting any younger) and a little bit of selfishness (What's going to happen to one when the other passes on) ...
All very understandable reasons and ones which made the decision even harder.
The decisions been made though ... and it's FINAL.
Good Luck
Three Legs
It's a sweetner !
Not an easy one ... my parents still haven't come to terms with it fully and they were told in May 2003.
I think in our case, it's a mixture of heartbreak (Me, the wife and the grandkids going), slight jealously (they thought of doing the same over 30 years ago), business worries (I'm with Dad in a family business and he's not getting any younger) and a little bit of selfishness (What's going to happen to one when the other passes on) ...
All very understandable reasons and ones which made the decision even harder.
The decisions been made though ... and it's FINAL.
Good Luck
Three Legs
#6
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 34
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by Three Legs
Tell your Dad you can get him Ashes tickets for the 2006/2007 series ...
It's a sweetner !
Not an easy one ... my parents still haven't come to terms with it fully and they were told in May 2003.
I think in our case, it's a mixture of heartbreak (Me, the wife and the grandkids going), slight jealously (they thought of doing the same over 30 years ago), business worries (I'm with Dad in a family business and he's not getting any younger) and a little bit of selfishness (What's going to happen to one when the other passes on) ...
All very understandable reasons and ones which made the decision even harder.
The decisions been made though ... and it's FINAL.
Good Luck
Three Legs
It's a sweetner !
Not an easy one ... my parents still haven't come to terms with it fully and they were told in May 2003.
I think in our case, it's a mixture of heartbreak (Me, the wife and the grandkids going), slight jealously (they thought of doing the same over 30 years ago), business worries (I'm with Dad in a family business and he's not getting any younger) and a little bit of selfishness (What's going to happen to one when the other passes on) ...
All very understandable reasons and ones which made the decision even harder.
The decisions been made though ... and it's FINAL.
Good Luck
Three Legs
#7
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,375
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
That's very admirable but it's not always as easy as that. Some families are "very" close ...
Originally Posted by CJN
I just told mine that I was sick of the weather here & sick of the keeping up with the Jones's mentalilty of this country.
#8
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
I told my parents at a large family dinner out, I really shouldn't have started with the words, 'we have an announcement to make'.
You could see the wedding bells/prams in their eyes. Oops, probably should have thought about that, all a bit of any anti-climax!!
Just say its what you really want. Do you think it'll be a problem?
You could see the wedding bells/prams in their eyes. Oops, probably should have thought about that, all a bit of any anti-climax!!
Just say its what you really want. Do you think it'll be a problem?
#9
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by CJN
I just told mine that I was sick of the weather here & sick of the keeping up with the Jones's mentalilty of this country.
#10
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 34
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by Three Legs
That's very admirable but it's not always as easy as that. Some families are "very" close ...
Yes they'll be upset, but if you didn't go & then in the future your kids wanted to emigrate you'll be upset thinking that you'd missed out.
#11
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by Three Legs
That's very admirable but it's not always as easy as that. Some families are "very" close ...
#12
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Joined: Jan 2005
Location: The Shoalhaven, New South Wales, Australia
Posts: 11,056
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
My parents were great about, but then they're ozzies living in NSW As for the wife's parents, they took it very well - there again, they spend half their lives on holiday, so I don't think they'll object to spending a 10th of every year down under.
#13
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 34
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by charlie brown
yes we are a close , that whats making it hard :scared:
Meet them tonight, tell them that it is your dream to go to Oz & try a new lifestyle BUT your going to stay put because you don't want to upset anyone............ it doesn't matter that you're going to resent everyone & everything for the rest of your life because you didn't go for your dream.
Tell them that you might hate it & might want to move back to this cold rock
#14
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by Three Legs
That's very admirable but it's not always as easy as that. Some families are "very" close ...
Heres a short version of our ours:
My M&D
Me: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Dad: Cool! We'll come over to visit next year. Id rather you didnt go but its your life, go for it!
Wifes M&D
Wife: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Wifes Dad: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGRRRHHHH gerrout of my house, how can you do that RAAAAAAARGGHHH RANT RANT VOMIT SNARLLL ETC etc!!!!
Me to Wife: F*** me what just happened there? Lets get out of here!! And we did!
It was a shock for him and I guess, but hes come round to it a bit more now. aaaaaand we're allowed back in his house, which is nice.
Good luck!
#15
Re: how do you tell perents your going to oz
Originally Posted by yamahaha
...which is why the generic Question presented in the subject header can never really be answered in a public forum. Its a personal thing as no two family relationships are the same. Poeple however will provide you with their experiences.
Heres a short version of our ours:
My M&D
Me: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Dad: Cool! We'll come over to visit next year. Id rather you didnt go but its your life, go for it!
Wifes M&D
Wife: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Wifes Dad: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGRRRHHHH gerrout of my house, how can you do that RAAAAAAARGGHHH RANT RANT VOMIT SNARLLL ETC etc!!!!
Me to Wife: F*** me what just happened there? Lets get out of here!! And we did!
It was a shock for him and I guess, but hes come round to it a bit more now. aaaaaand we're allowed back in his house, which is nice.
Good luck!
Heres a short version of our ours:
My M&D
Me: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Dad: Cool! We'll come over to visit next year. Id rather you didnt go but its your life, go for it!
Wifes M&D
Wife: eeeeer we're off to Oz to live, what do you think of that?
Wifes Dad: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGRRRHHHH gerrout of my house, how can you do that RAAAAAAARGGHHH RANT RANT VOMIT SNARLLL ETC etc!!!!
Me to Wife: F*** me what just happened there? Lets get out of here!! And we did!
It was a shock for him and I guess, but hes come round to it a bit more now. aaaaaand we're allowed back in his house, which is nice.
Good luck!