kerrieee

Please could any one give me some advice , my husband company has just offered him a transfer to Brisbane.We are really keen to make the move but we have two teenage children dont want to
live away as we have only been back in the England for two years after years of living in the U.A.E.. Has any one been through the same situation?

Dawn&Jamie

I'd give them a choice!


Brisbane or the local council run childrens home! That should do the trick!

Juliecabs

Not quite the same situation, but we are moving to Brisbane with our 3 teenagers.
Is this a permanent move or just for a certain period of time?
Because you have moved already recently I can understand your childrens frustrations about moving again, but I'm sure they quickly made new friends back in the UK and I'm sure they will do again in Oz if this is what's worrying them.
If it's to be permanent then reassure them that this time you're staying put, but if it's just a temporary thing, then they'll see their friends in the UK again before they'll have had time to miss them. There is so much to see and do in Oz, I'm sure they will settle just nicely.

If I'm way off the track here and the reason they don't want to move is because of friends then I'll shut up now and hide away in a corner but this is the reason most kids are reluctant to make the move.

Good Luck
Julie

Dawn&Jamie

sorry for my earlier flippent reply, was only joking!

We have 2 teenagers, 1 preteen and 3 almost 4yr olds! The 3 oldest children are quite excited about the prospect of a new life down under. But they havent already been living abroad like yours. I guess maybe they are feeling a little insecure perhaps? I'm sure they'll come round. Good luck

kerrieee

Hi Julie, Thanks for your help, This would be a permanent move this time around. It did take my Daughter a long time to make friends again on moving back to UK. I feel a bit happier on finding this Forum and now can see how many other Family's with older children move to Oz.
We will book a trip over as soon as know more details about the move so they
realise its different from U.A.E. Hopefully that might help as well.
cheers Kerry

kerrieee

Hi Dawn and Jamie,
What a Good idea never thought of childrens home, What a funny Reply just our sense of humour, Wish thought of that last time would of saved a load on school fees.
Cheers kerry

Juliecabs

No probs Kerry,
Tell 'em about the Theme Parks and swimming with dolphins. That usually works.
Julie

kerrieee

Hi Again
I think your right my 13 year probably does feel insecure, and just getting used to UK again myself , I'm sure they will come around soon as they realise there not only British kids down under, it will less of culture shock as well this time around.Thanks for your help kerry ps where the children home just in case?

.

kerrieee

Hi Julie
Did Promise my daughter a kangroo and Dolphin as pets and got a laugh from her
so one step forward I hope Kerry

meelie

Hi
I thought I'd tell you about my own experience.
We arrived on 1st July and my daughter turned 16 a few days later. She didn't seem as keen as us about moving to Oz but agreed to come. Well, the first few weeks she just cried, slobbed around the house, no motivation etc etc and wanted to go back to the UK. We got her to agree to go to high school here (no not with a gun at her back) and since then she couldn't be happier! She has a better social life than me, has made loads of friends and now says she would only go back to the UK to visit her friends and relatives as she wants to stay in Oz! Its hard for older children as they think friends are more important than family and what with all those hormones it can be a difficult time.

Margaret2

You don't know how much this post has cheered me up today, my 14 year old daughter is making me so miserable about the whole moving to aus, I am on the verge of calling the whole thing off, which would still make me miserable, but I love her so much. I have tried to get her to accept a year and if she is miserable we will come back, but things just seem to be worse at present, they have never been great since this whole thing started, but the more hormones involved the worse everything gets!!

Will show her this post and see her reaction

Juliecabs

Oh Margaret, don't get too down about it.
How far into your application are you? There may still be time for her to come round.
Where are you off to? We're off to the Gold Coast next August.
My youngest daughter is nearly 14 and is desperate to go. I could get her to email your daughter if that would help. We've been there on holiday so she knows quite a lot about great places to go and things to do, so if you're heading in the same direction she may be of help to you.

Julie

kris maynard

Hi
I dont have teenagers although my eldest is 12 (thinks shes 18) she cant wait!
On Sunday met a freind of ours friend who was dragged by her parents kicking and screaming when she was 16 , she was telling us how she gave her parents such a hard time but now would never live anywhere else!
She moved to the Gold Coast 8 years ago and is back here for 3 months with her Mum as her sister is having a baby!!
She couldnt rate Oz and all it has to offer for families highly enough!!

Not much help I dont spose but shows kids do come around eventually!!

kris xx

Cheetah7

Actually, not being a mum myself, I was wondering just how much power should children have over the migration process?

I realise that voices need to be heard but I was chatting to Rooksie on Sunday and we were saying that you wouldn't give a child a major decision or even burden them with one would you?

I know their input is important, but I am curious as to how many people would either cancel their plans to emigrate or move back to the UK because their children didn't like it?

When my mate moved her family from one end of the UK to the other - big difference to Oz I know, her daughter became quite distressed and the homesickness lasted for a year.

Does the parents know best approach extend to that of migration or should children have a major role in the deciding factor?

I wasn't even allowed to choose secondary school when I was little, I had an opinion, but the overall choice was my parents.

It must be so hard for all you parents if you have an unhappy child who doesnt like or want to move to Australia, but I think if you truly believe that what you are doing is right for your family and your child, then as the adult of the family, you must do it.

I reckon chances of happiness don't come around all that often. Until your child becomes an adult, you have to take your path in life and grab those opportunities.

Your children will have their time when they are old enough and your time is now.

I don't think kids always see the benefits of their parents decisions, I know I didn't.

But looking back in hindsight, everything my mum did for me was in my best interest. I didnt see it then and there were tears and tantrums along the way.

Part of life I suppose.

Good friends stay in touch, other friends fall by the wayside, but part of the process of growing up is to make new friends along the way.

Good luck to the original poster, please take your dream and live it while you can.

Your children will have the chance to live theirs soon enough and you should never feel guilty for giving your kids a great opportunity.

Love Sam

Juliecabs

Here, Here, Sam.
I agree with you although I am in a position to say that as my 3 teenagers are all so desparate to move. They all have huge groups of mates here, some of which they have known since preschool, but they still want to go, and will hopefully keep in touch with them all.
I'm also well aware of the fact that as soon as they are old enough they may want to return back here again. I'll have to deal with that then.
We're doing what we think is right for our 3 but who knows what the future holds. We'll deal with whatever as and when the time comes.
I think it is important to listen to our kids opinions but at the end of the day, we are the parents and it is up to us to do what we feel is right for them.