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-   -   Has anyone ever left the kids behind? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/australia-54/has-anyone-ever-left-kids-behind-358191/)

pippin lara Feb 28th 2006 6:26 pm

Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David

Wendy Feb 28th 2006 6:30 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 

Originally Posted by pippin lara
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David


I think it's a brilliant idea. If you have someone here that's able and willing to do that for you then great, go for it. It will make you're life so much easier.

Wendy

zbettyboop Feb 28th 2006 7:20 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 

Originally Posted by pippin lara
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David

Hi David

Dont have kids myself.
But what you are doing is a great idea.
NO stress of trying to keep the kids happy while you are sort everything out.
10/10 go for it.
You are doing them a favour in the long run. ;)

Beth :)

irishbloo Feb 28th 2006 9:10 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
Hi David in theory it seems a great idea.me personally i wouldnt do it.We have two kids similar ages and im sure that it will be tough at times dragging them around with us im hoping that it will be exciting too for them.I think that mine would get upset if i headed off and left them there.I left them once for two weeks and it was very hard on me and my husband.They were none the wiser as they stayed with Granma,infact they still dont dont about it.If you are sure its what you want to do go for it.x Irishbloo

Stitch Feb 28th 2006 9:11 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 

Originally Posted by pippin lara
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David


Sounds like a fab idea....unfortunately ours have to come (only kidding)!

Cheers

Ginny

KatieStar Feb 28th 2006 9:28 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
I can understand why you are considering this, though I agree with Irishbloo that I would want the whole family to share the adventure. The big flight out etc. I am sure at times they will be a bit underfoot but would they not find it exciting as well? All new things.

Good luck
Katie

Mike-and-Rosi Feb 28th 2006 9:40 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
We're now looking at about our 4th time moving countries and each time one of us (usually the husband) heads out first to get the job, find a rental house, get a car etc and spend the first month getting things going.

Once that's done either you fly back and then the whole family do the journey or since Aus is so far will probably meet them in Dubai or Singapore depending on which flight we all get.

In my opinion (and it is just my opinion) there is just too much to do initially and it's so much easier for one person to do it all without having to think about wife and kids and what they're up to and are they happy.

Though I must admit it gets harder to be separated each time...the one downside to it all!!!

Regards
Mike




Originally Posted by pippin lara
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David


majortom Feb 28th 2006 9:40 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
In my opinoin your children could think that you are leaving them behind.

Children that age have strong bonds with their parents, and I personally think that you are thinking about yourselves and not the children.

Sorry to sound hard, but I don't think the reasons justify why you want to leave the children behind.

Mike-and-Rosi Feb 28th 2006 9:48 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
I guess it depends on how well the kids get on with the people they're being left with. Ours have always been with one of the parents and with regular contact while I was away they have never had any issue or thoughts like you're suggesting - though of course they do miss me while I'm away.

But I agree that it has to be handled sensitively and if you've never been away from your kids before this may be too much for them to handle



Originally Posted by majortom
In my opinoin your children could think that you are leaving them behind.

Children that age have strong bonds with their parents, and I personally think that you are thinking about yourselves and not the children.

Sorry to sound hard, but I don't think the reasons justify why you want to leave the children behind.


BadgeIsBack Feb 28th 2006 9:54 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
4 weeks is a holiday. I thought you meant permanently. Do it. I used to love staying with the grandparents. Biccies/cakes at morning tea/afternoon tea...etc etc

cheri-pie Feb 28th 2006 9:59 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
Hi

I'm sorry to disagree with most people but for me personally, there could be no way I could leave the kids for four weeks - four days would be hard enough!

They are not babies at that age, they have feelings and would want to be a part of the excitement and feel that their opinion counts - even if you say 'this is nice isn't it?' 'yes mum' or 'I don't like this, do you?' 'no mum' It makes them feel that they have contributed something.

I know there is a lot to do but surely there could be a compromise? Maybe one day do mum and dad stuff the next day kids stuff? We did that on our reccie and the kids were great. And they feel that this is a family that decide things together. We have long talks on everything that we do and I know that buying furniture or opening bank accounts are boring but at least they are part of the adventure.

Only you know your kids and how they will take this as what they may see as 'abandonment' while you are getting things sorted, but surely a lot of these things can be done from here before you go? You certainly have plenty of time before next January.

Sorry if I sound harsh but as I said this is my opinion in my family circumstances and for me and my OH it would be No Way would we leave them behind.

Cheri

Jaycee1 Feb 28th 2006 10:06 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
What in a Home Alone kinda way?
Friends of mine did exactly as you are thinking and went for a month! :cool:
They got so much done and found places to live, banks, insurance etc. all without having to entertain children all under 8 (x3) I might add.
Fantastic idea but I couldn't personally leave mine for a month. But it is up to the individual. :) Good Luck with what ever you decide.

cranni Feb 28th 2006 11:37 pm

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 

Originally Posted by pippin lara
Not permanently, unfortunately!

She who must be obeyed has started hatching a plan for the big move - visa process under way with (hopefully) a move next January.

It appears that the first few weeks or so in Aus will be frantic to say the least - houses, cars, jobs, banks, money, medicare, etc, etc etc.

The plan is to leave the kids (6 and 10) here with the grandparents. Then, they bring the kids out about 4 or so weeks later, once all the crap has been sorted out. They stay for a few weeks - see we have settled ok - then go home happy.

Has anyone ever considered or carried out something similar?

Any views appreciated.

David

Its a great idea, something we would all do if we had the choice.
Dragging 3 kids around was a nightmare, we came when it was the summer hols, so they where off for 7 weeks.
We had so much to do, they where bored, fighting and arguing, I would have done it, if i could.
Then me nd hubby could have had some romance ;)
Go for it, and it will give the kids quality time with the grandparents as well.
Good luck to you ,Denise

mand8002 Mar 1st 2006 7:14 am

Re: Has anyone ever left the kids behind?
 
My younger daughter was 10 when we moved out. She enjoyed being a part of the decision making regarding which house we rented and which area we lived in etc. I think she would have been devastated if we had left her behind as the adventure is the whole familys and she would have felt very left out.


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