fishface

hi after much deliberation myself and my family moved back to the UK, after just 8 months in oz. our jobs situation and i guess missing people was the drive behind it.
However now we have been home 6 months and I am going crazy to get back and wish sooo much we had sorted ourselves out there b4 rushing back. Sadly my hubby has no desire to return and rightly so he is irritated with me for mentioning it, especially as it cost a lot as we moved furniture etc, and our kids 4 and 5 are settling back here.
I had false expectations of family and friends here and now remember why it was easy to leave.
I miss the weather the friendly non class people i met and the great schools and health care that we experienced too.
Has anyone else had a similar experience and if so how did you persuade you partner to return.
Perhaps i should just try to forget and move on, which i have been trying, but proving very difficult and have felt this way since first week home!!!
Help

cam_uk

My Girlfriend and I were out there in 2002 and stayed six months ... due to personal reasons we came back.

Now we're married with a child and pending visa approval we will be flying out to brisbane at the end of november ..

leaving was the biggest mistake i have ever made and i'm chuffed to bits we've got a second bite at it ...

fishface

wow great for you have a fab time! we were on the sunshine coast in caloundra and it was stunning.
were you both keen to go back again, or did one of you need encouragement?

Buzzy--Bee

Not quite the same, but we moved to NZ and then back to the UK because of the poor (no) job situation there. We are planning on moving to Oz next year.

martin and sharon

Fishface,

Have`nt been in the same situation as yourself, but after reading about yourself, it is gonna make me more determined than ever to stay out there when things get hard. I have said to my hubby "if things got bad and we ever returned to UK, when we landed back it would remind us straight away why we left in the first place", and you have just confirmed this. Good luck in persuading your other half to reurn tp Oz. Hope it all works out for you.

Sharon and martin

Secretsquirral

Hi Fishface!

We lived in Melbourne in 2003 for 8 months, and also spent quite a bit of time in Queensland. We came back partly due to personal reasons and also partly as I was homesick. Same as you, realised that while you can look at Oz through rose-tinted specs, so can you look at the UK in the same way whilst living overseas, and although I love the UK, I have realised why we left in the first place! I will miss my family I know, but now I have baby twin boys I will be taking most of my family with me this time!

Luckily, didn't have to pursuade my hubby at all as he didn't want to come back to the UK anyway, but this time we are renting out our house rather than selling it, but more because of the housing market and poor Oz exchange rate than in case we return. But it is a safety net which is reassuring to my hubby, as he is worried I may want to come back again one day! We are also lucky in that the boys ages mean that I won't have to worry about schooling for a few years yet.

We are heading out to the Sunshine Coast this time, Mooloolaba, as we love that area. We fly out in March next year. Your hubby is probably worried that you will stay another few months and uproot again, but this time we have made the effort to get in touch with people going to the same area, as you cannot underestimate the feelings of isolation and loneliness, as you probably know. Making new friends in a similar situation has got to be one the the most important factors in being able to settle, in my opinion.

Good luck in whatever you (or your hubby, more importantly) decide.

Debbie

Aussie_Pride

Yer good luck to you not a easy thing to do with kids as you could just sell everything and move back and not bother with having to ship everything if you were on you own.

JAYMAC

Hi

We are due out at the end of November and the advice from my mum who spent two years out there 40 years ago (one of the £10 poms) was to fight the homesickness and try to get through it. She has advised that if I really feel like I want to come home we should try to get back for a holiday and will soon realise we want to head straight back.

My mum returned to Uk from Oz after giving birth to my sister (her first child)and the homesickness got the better of her. She would have returned to Oz if she had the chance back then.

Jaymac

fishface

Def would be my advice to all who are ever thinking of coming back to resist, but if desperate to have a holiday. A huge mistake that really unsettled us was also to allow so many visitors to come. we had three lofs of family in six months. Although great to see people it was really really unsettling for us and I believe started the homesickness thing going. It is hard to defer family and friends, but harder to keep moving around the world. In the first few months you need time to settle and stay focused on your dreams. Family and friends will try their hardest to get you back!!! good luck everyone, and thanks for your encouragement, I may try hypnotherapy on my hubby!!!!

cam_uk

We ae both very keen to get back, last time we pretty much picked up our life from the uk and dropped it in newcastle, nsw .. we missed friends, family and our UK lifestyle (partying etc!!)

Now we're a little older and a little wiser and realise that the reasons we came home, were silly reasons as most of the friends we had back then soon disappeared when we became a family of 3 ... and our lives had to change ... (and for the better!!!)

Now we want to go back to the wide open spaces, sunshine and more relaxed lifestyle as we are now at the stage in our lives where we want that and we want to be able to give our daughter that too ...

I hope that you can convince you hubby that going back would be a good move and that in the not too distant future your sitting on the beach with a few stubbies

cam_uk

I thought that having vistors would help the homesick-ness (sp!) ... we plan to arrange for visitors on 3-6 monthly intervals to give us goals to work towards .. we'd be excited to see people from back home .. and to show off 'our new country'

possoms

Maybe hes frightened of get back out there for you to want to come back again? I know someone who has been back and forth 5 times!!!! a hell of a lot of money.

Good luck in persuading him, does he want to go back? did he want to come back to uk?

cam_uk

Yikes!!!!

fishface

maybe that will work for you having visitors, for us it was a mistake, at least so soon. family and friends had a rose tinted spec effect on us about our need to come back to the UK. once home you realise as you said everyone else is busy moves on, and the life you left cannot be picked up. I think such a move and experience also changed me and us as people and we were different too. Good luck with the move, I'm not jealous at all!!!!

TigerFeet

Good thread and very poignent (spell?)

We have been in Perth for 4 and 1/2 months now.

My partner and 2 children have settled in..and so well too, they absolutley love it.

Me, on the other hand...I am very homesick.

Before we moved out here we made ourselves a promise. That whatever happens we would give it 2 years. And this is what we will do.
Even now.... feeling the way I do... I realise it is still early days.

If my partner said to me tomorrow ''Sod it Katie, lets go back to England'' I wouldnt go....as bad as I feel now...

Its important to give it time.

Who knows next year/month/week I may feel differently.

I know I have to see it through. If I stay here 2 years and still feel the same... well thats another story.

My advice is to stick it out. In my case I know in my heart its the right thing to do. In my situation there are 3 other people to think about (2 of em are little uns) and I want to make the right decision.

Good luck, stick at it,

TigerFeet