Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
#151
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 14,040
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Congrats on the outcome for all your stress and hard work.
#153
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Agree with everyone else, it was great to read of a good outcome - you and your wife have fought so hard, and it shows persistance pays when right is on your side. Excellent news.
#156
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
I don't really know how to begin this update. So i'll jump right in with the bomb shell. Sunday June 3rd at 09.15 we got a phone call that has changed all of our lives. My daughters defacto aka the oxygen thief was the caller. He was ringing to inform us that our daughter had given birth to a little girl 5 mins earlier. 3.005k [6lb 6] and 49 cm long WTF! Yes without informing anyone, without any antenatal care, without even informing her GP. Understandably it was quite some time before I/we could begin to process the information and the day passed by with me in a state of shock, anger & disappointment. Luckily both mother and baby appeared to be in reasonable health. Monday morning the call came in from Child Protection asking if we would take in a newborn while investigations into the parents were conducted. Our daughter had exhibited signs of drug use so both her and baby were tested. After an initial NO WAY! 24hrs of the other two children sobbing and inconsolable we were hit with a second bombshell: mother and baby both tested positive for cannabis, ice &/or methamphetamine. Faced with the prospect of the baby being placed into foster care and the two we've cared for for 18 months [now 2 years] never talking to us again we relented. The baby spent a week in maternity while she was weaned off the drugs, the screaming was horrific, something I never want to ever hear again.
For the last 6 months I've been primary caregiver to a new baby. I've swapped a building site for nappies and prams. All of our lives have changed dramatically. Deb continues to work as a nurse, I take the baby into the nursing home once a week and she's the centre of attention with the residents, she works the room with giggles and smiles. I stay home and do mountains of washing, I swear the kids don't put their clothes away they just put them straight back in the laundry basket! We've got to the stage where the kids are voting my cooking better than grandma's. They had friends stay over last night and my Shepherd's Pie was voted better than at their house, must be the red wine! They hate spaghetti bolognese so if they play up I cook it. They love Paella so if they're really good I'll do that.
I worked away from home when my son was born, until he was about 7 months old. I missed those unique moments like the first smile, the first roll over & the first chuckle. I also missed the overflowing nappy, & the projectile vomiting of the first tummy bug so it's not all fun. I can manage the soiled ones now without a generous smearing of Vicks under my nose, I built up to it slowly Madam is now standing up, sitting up and has managed to crawl backwards, though not quite got the forward motion yet. Not a bad effort for a 6 month old so they tell me.
Yesterday we were granted an 18 month custody order while the parents attempt to clean up and sort their lives out. With charges pending for failed roadside drug tests they haven't made much of a start as yet. Whilst I've still avidly read the forum I've not posted much at my hands are usually full of a wriggling bundle of fun & smiles. People say we're mad, we probably are lol it certainly helps.
A couple of years ago we were planning for the two of us to set off to travel around Australia. Now there's 5 of us so we might just stay put for a while longer. The last two years has taught me a lot about myself, I've done quite a few really good courses on looking after children and dealing with problem young adults. I recommend "Therapeutic Crisis Intervention For Families" It's made all of our lives so much easier. I wish it had been available 30 years ago.
I began writing this when she was 10 weeks old so it's a bit jumbled and edited lol I blame sleep deprivation I've offered her to asio for breaking down terrorist suspects but haven't heard back yet.
Our little family wish you all a very merry Christmas and a happy new year.
For the last 6 months I've been primary caregiver to a new baby. I've swapped a building site for nappies and prams. All of our lives have changed dramatically. Deb continues to work as a nurse, I take the baby into the nursing home once a week and she's the centre of attention with the residents, she works the room with giggles and smiles. I stay home and do mountains of washing, I swear the kids don't put their clothes away they just put them straight back in the laundry basket! We've got to the stage where the kids are voting my cooking better than grandma's. They had friends stay over last night and my Shepherd's Pie was voted better than at their house, must be the red wine! They hate spaghetti bolognese so if they play up I cook it. They love Paella so if they're really good I'll do that.
I worked away from home when my son was born, until he was about 7 months old. I missed those unique moments like the first smile, the first roll over & the first chuckle. I also missed the overflowing nappy, & the projectile vomiting of the first tummy bug so it's not all fun. I can manage the soiled ones now without a generous smearing of Vicks under my nose, I built up to it slowly Madam is now standing up, sitting up and has managed to crawl backwards, though not quite got the forward motion yet. Not a bad effort for a 6 month old so they tell me.
Yesterday we were granted an 18 month custody order while the parents attempt to clean up and sort their lives out. With charges pending for failed roadside drug tests they haven't made much of a start as yet. Whilst I've still avidly read the forum I've not posted much at my hands are usually full of a wriggling bundle of fun & smiles. People say we're mad, we probably are lol it certainly helps.
A couple of years ago we were planning for the two of us to set off to travel around Australia. Now there's 5 of us so we might just stay put for a while longer. The last two years has taught me a lot about myself, I've done quite a few really good courses on looking after children and dealing with problem young adults. I recommend "Therapeutic Crisis Intervention For Families" It's made all of our lives so much easier. I wish it had been available 30 years ago.
I began writing this when she was 10 weeks old so it's a bit jumbled and edited lol I blame sleep deprivation I've offered her to asio for breaking down terrorist suspects but haven't heard back yet.
Our little family wish you all a very merry Christmas and a happy new year.
#157
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
A very Happy Christmas to you and your even more extended family, you really are the sort of grandparents every child should have. Lovely to hear your news.
#158
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
What you and Deb have done for those children is amazing. I have no words other than I hope you and yours have a very happy holiday.
#159
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
They are three beautiful, healthy, happy looking girls. You are a wonderful couple with wonderful friends who have supported you fantastically and every photo of you all that I see with the girls interacting with the adults makes me smile every time. Have a brilliant Christmas. x
#160
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Oh Cresta, what a time of it you and Deb have had over the past years and especially the last 6 months. So much love, loyalty and selflessness in your post, what dear, dear people you and Deb are. The bub sounds like she's doing brilliantly after such a difficult start to life, you're pretty bloody good at this stuff! Wishing the 5 of you a happy Christmas and a happy and healthy 2019 xx
#161
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Those children are so lucky to have amazing people like you in their lives. I know the word "hero" is bandied around a lot nowadays but I just can't think of a better description
#162
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Oh My Heavens! A bomb shell indeed and how very lucky are those girls to have you there to pick up their pieces. I cant imagine doing that myself but I guess I would if push comes to shove! My hat is off to you for doing it! Merry Christmas to you all - it's going to be really special with your family this year!
#163
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
I often wondered how things were going for the lot of you. So glad to read your update. Congratulations on your newest granddaughter. You and your lovely Deb are wonderful grandparents and people. A hard lot you have but you are weathering it as best you can and the girls seem to be thriving.
Merry Christmas and may your New Year not include any other dirty diaper surprises.
Merry Christmas and may your New Year not include any other dirty diaper surprises.
#164
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Wow.
If it's of any help and/or encouragement, a friend had a similar situation where she had to become guardian of her granddaugher who had been born with heroin withdrawal - the father (her son) was in and out of prison and his partner was too drug dependant to be able to care for the child.
That was 5 years ago and, even with all the difficulties they've faced, both with the physical and emotional effects on B, she's happily in school and meeting all her developmental and educational milestones. It's been incredibly difficult but also incredibly rewarding - much love and good luck to all of you.
If it's of any help and/or encouragement, a friend had a similar situation where she had to become guardian of her granddaugher who had been born with heroin withdrawal - the father (her son) was in and out of prison and his partner was too drug dependant to be able to care for the child.
That was 5 years ago and, even with all the difficulties they've faced, both with the physical and emotional effects on B, she's happily in school and meeting all her developmental and educational milestones. It's been incredibly difficult but also incredibly rewarding - much love and good luck to all of you.
#165
Re: Grandparents Family Court Custody Order?
Wow Cresta! Although I haven't posted in your thread before I have been following. You and your wife are wonderful people. Good luck with the kids, I hope everything pans out the way you wish xx