Goodbye again!
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:17 pm
#1
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 5,439
Goodbye again!
I know, I know we've heard this before! but this time I think it's serious.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time
I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week!
I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time
I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week! I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:25 pm
#2
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,129
Re: Goodbye again!
not really much I can say except take care of yourself and your partner - I wish you all the very best, keep your chin up -
Lynn
Lynn
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:27 pm
#3
Joined: Jan 2003
Location: Fremantle
Posts: 675
Re: Goodbye again!
Best of luck with everything, Paul!
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:31 pm
#4
.
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 21,374
Re: Goodbye again!
Hello Jim, sorry to hear that mate and I hope your wife is Ok.
I know it'll maybe be hard for you to come on here but please do as you have often made me laugh at a time when i've been mainly all stressed.
All the best to you and yours and good luck with your future.
Fraser, Rachel and family
I know it'll maybe be hard for you to come on here but please do as you have often made me laugh at a time when i've been mainly all stressed.
All the best to you and yours and good luck with your future.
Fraser, Rachel and family
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:36 pm
#5
Here at last
Joined: Nov 2004
Location: Now here in sunny Sandy Beach, near Coffs Harbour, N.S.W.)
Posts: 774
Re: Goodbye again!
Originally Posted by lynnlovessun
not really much I can say except take care of yourself and your partner - I wish you all the very best, keep your chin up -
Lynn
Lynn
Apr 23rd 2005, 7:39 pm
#6
Banned
Joined: Feb 2004
Location: Somerly,Perth
Posts: 545
Re: Goodbye again!
mate I'm real sorry too hear that.
I read out your post to my wife, as its puts all our own problems with the move into perspective.
Good luck to you and your family in whatever you decide to do......dont give up on the dream.
I read out your post to my wife, as its puts all our own problems with the move into perspective.
Good luck to you and your family in whatever you decide to do......dont give up on the dream.
Apr 23rd 2005, 8:18 pm
#7
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: Goodbye again!
Originally Posted by Jim2004
I know, I know we've heard this before! but this time I think it's serious.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week!
I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time
I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week! I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
You have read the stories of homesickness, missing the family support network etc.
And in times of illness, it is a lifeline to those suffering.
You have to remember that whilst you cannot migrate to Australia for the reasons you have mentioned, but it's always 'on loan' so to speak.
If ever you had the money to do it, you can get the tourist long stay visa to stay six months.
You can visit as often as money allows.
Your partner will have the choice to visit the country she loves and return back home to the warmth of her family and those that love her.
If you are prepared to make those compromises, you will come through it together.
Australia will always be there.
But what is important now is your partners health and getting her throught this difficult time.
One of the things that make Britain 'Great' is our NHS and although some slag it off, I wouldn't swap it.
They will help her, you will help her and Australia will always be there to put the sunshine back into her life.
Oh yes, if you ever want to meet up for that drink, bring your partner and I will meet you in Watford.
Sam
Apr 23rd 2005, 8:23 pm
#8
Bitter and twisted
Joined: Dec 2003
Location: Upmarket
Posts: 17,503
Re: Goodbye again!
Good luck Jim
It is not a good idea to move in the middle of a period of depression.
Hopefully your partner will recover OK.
All the best for the future
G
It is not a good idea to move in the middle of a period of depression.
Hopefully your partner will recover OK.
All the best for the future
G
Apr 23rd 2005, 8:24 pm
#9
I am not the Messiah!
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Cairns
Posts: 1,273
Re: Goodbye again!
Originally Posted by lynnlovessun
not really much I can say except take care of yourself and your partner - I wish you all the very best, keep your chin up -
Lynn
Lynn
Like you said you have had some good laughs on here and it is a very stressfull process for everyone. You dont realise this until you start doing all the paperwork etc and then reality starts to sink in.
We wish you and your family every happiness for whatever you decide to do in the future.
Take care Paul,
R & C
Apr 23rd 2005, 9:21 pm
#10
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8,147
Re: Goodbye again!
eyup paul,
like sam said, i think you have made the right decision - aus is always there for a holiday....your wifes health comes first.
good luck to you and your family
sue
like sam said, i think you have made the right decision - aus is always there for a holiday....your wifes health comes first.
good luck to you and your family
sue
Apr 23rd 2005, 9:47 pm
#11
......in the sand !
Joined: Nov 2004
Location: Perth, WA :)
Posts: 4,421
Re: Goodbye again!
I wish you and your family well .
Dreams are what you and your family hope for, and they can aways change, now and in the future.
Gillian
Dreams are what you and your family hope for, and they can aways change, now and in the future.
Gillian
Apr 23rd 2005, 11:33 pm
#12
High in the Dandenongs
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Listening to Puffing Billy
Posts: 9,183
Re: Goodbye again!
I'm so sorry for you both. Heres to future happiness for you both. Stick around on this site if it keeps your spirits up, the more the merrier
Apr 24th 2005, 12:16 am
#13
sunny coast
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 3,514
Re: Goodbye again!
just reading your thread and i feel completely gutted for you and your family,i think that you have made the right decision and that your family must come first no matter what.my heart goes out to you and yours.
best wishes jonni
best wishes jonni
Apr 24th 2005, 12:37 am
#14
Hot and sweaty member!!
Joined: Apr 2002
Location: WA I think!
Posts: 2,031
Re: Goodbye again!
Just to say Paul that I really feel for you and your family.
I too have had periods of depression in my life and these are going to be very difficult times for you over the next weeks/ months. Be there for your wife when she needs to cry/ scream or whatever, that Im sure you will...Just try to be as understanding as you can,.....oh and if you need support too...ask for it because its very stressful for you as the carer too.!
I too have had periods of depression in my life and these are going to be very difficult times for you over the next weeks/ months. Be there for your wife when she needs to cry/ scream or whatever, that Im sure you will...Just try to be as understanding as you can,.....oh and if you need support too...ask for it because its very stressful for you as the carer too.!
Apr 27th 2005, 7:31 am
#15
Suzy's Mummy too!
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Gold Coast!
Posts: 4,231
Re: Goodbye again!
Originally Posted by Jim2004
I know, I know we've heard this before! but this time I think it's serious.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week!
I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
A few of you will know my rough situation about how I had planned to go to Oz later this year to study to gain PR. Myself, partner and children (and dog) was all set to go.
Well my partner has suffered with depression on several occasions over the last 12 years, and is currently goin thru a REAL bad time
I won't blabber to much on this one, but has attempted suicide twice in the last week! I've had worries about how she will cope in Oz and upon reading recent postings on here about how Australia DOESN'T fund mental health as much as say the UK does with the NHS, well this + at last admitting to ourselves family support is the no1 thing in life for us now, well we just can't go!
I'm gutted to have had to come to this conclusion, but realistically this is the best option to stay put, for my other half's sake! she needs the family support and altho we kidded ourself we would be ok in oz without it, if this happened out there, we'd be pretty much fudged! ........ I cannot take the risk!
Up until about a week ago, altho she was suffering with the depression, we thought we'd just put Oz on stand by for bit, get her better and get back to plan A, but recently I've had to come to the conclusion the family is WHAT WE NEED! I know many ppl have probs without family, leaving, settling, missing them, and know they get by, even if it takes a long time! but I just can't help coming to the conclusion it's just too much of a risk!
I can handle risks and pressure no prob, but she cannot. Maybe I was dreaming all along, but if this hadn't happened I'm sure we coulda done it! ....... but as I say, too risky now!
Sooooooooooo, altho I may very well stick about Expat in one way or another (had a lot of good times on here!) I think it makes sense to say we won't be going!
I haven't been around Expat for a few days recently cos of what has been going on, and just in case I never return, I just want to thank all who have helped me over the last year or so with help, support, giggles, and basically whatever!
I thank you all!
As I started off this post, 'you've heard it all b4' ...... well I HAVE said this b4, but this time I just feel it is definite!
I'll be back tho as altho I won't ever get to Oz now, I still feel a bond with the site and ........ oh I dunno, just had a lot of fun on here, so don't see myself never visiting British Expat ever again. It might not be for a while, but Jim2004 will live on
Thanks again everyone!
Jim2004 - Paul.
Love Claire, Steve & jonah
xxx
