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following my heart

following my heart

Old May 22nd 2003, 10:20 am
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I see a lot of comments about Australia in this wonderful forum, and I wonder if Ive made the right choice in wanting to move my family (back) there.
Ive had first hand experience of the tax system, the transport system, the schooling, living in the suburbs, in the mountains and at Bondi (all NSW), the people, the usual ups and downs.

Ive lived in the UK for 6 years and its been exciting, vibrant and fulfilling ,hard work and scary and lonely...and I have friends and a daughter who are pommies. I lived in and out of London

Yet as I rush to work each morning, take my stance on the train platform and attempt to rugby tackle my way onto the train I wonder why I bother wondering.
I cant afford another child over here. I cant afford not to work or even to work part time. The average salary seems far beyond the grasp of myself and most of my friends, with or without uni degrees.
Every night I take my little pommie daughter home in her pram at the risk of personal injury to us both. And thats just the bus trip.
Everyday at work I have to edit my words in case I say something thats not PC. Even though I have paid my taxes here I still am not allowed to comment on any aspect of the UK unless its a glowing review.

But ironically, the minute I step foot onto Australia im going to miss all the things in the UK that are pissing me off right now.

Does anyone else ever feel this way?

I cant be complicating the matter. Im going to follow my heart. It might just lead me back here one day, that's all.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 10:25 am
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What were your reasons for moving to the UK? What will you miss from the UK if you go back to OZ?

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Old May 22nd 2003, 11:17 am
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Hi Dawn
Oz is a huge place but it can become a small place very quickly.
I moved here because I was young and I wanted to see more of the world. I didnt have huge amitions to travel everywhere, I did want to put down some roots and really experience living in another culture. It ended up that I stayed in the UK, which has huge cultural differences with OZ, despite what people might think
Im going to miss the feeling of anonymity in the UK
The work conditions, the liberal attitude.
There's a lot of negatives as well, but the moment I step away from them, most will become associated my past and I'll end up adding them to my 'fond memories'.

The only thing I will say about london (not UK) is that its pretty much survival of the fittest, and Im tired of competing.
Im also getting tired of that feeling unhappiness, which is mainly due to me comparing my childhood with that of my daughter. Things have definitely changed but I can still give her a better chance at life than this.

If I got specific about what Im unhappy with, Id be whinging. If I accept the standards offered to me here for my particular income /standing here then id be letting myself and my family down, knowing what I know about Oz.
Perhaps when Im older and wiser and have more free time, and a higher disposable income it might feel right to end up back here.

Why are you off to OZ?
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Old May 22nd 2003, 11:37 am
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I know what you mean, the minute you leave the UK you will "miss" all the things you moan about. I will be the same, a lot of the reasons I am leaving, like the weather, and the dirt and pollution, and the miserable people, etc etc - they are all things that in a funny way I will miss.
However I won't be sorry to leave. I'll just miss them cos they are familiar and because at the moment they form the surroundings of my life.
I will always have a space in my heart for the UK, and will enjoy coming back to visit it, but I am looking forward to living amongst people who are a bit more cheerful about life, and have a slightly more positive outlook (yes, I know I'm generalising!). I'm also lookng forward to being able to enjoy the money I work for, instead of being constantly broke due to the high cost of living.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:11 pm
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Ruthyman

The only thing I will say about london (not UK) is that its pretty much survival of the fittest, and Im tired of competing.
Im also getting tired of that feeling unhappiness, which is mainly due to me comparing my childhood with that of my daughter. Things have definitely changed but I can still give her a better chance at life than this.

This is the bit of what you said that sums it up for me.

I'm so tired of the "survival of the fittest regime" (thats not to say I'm a failure - I'm not. I've done OK thanks, but I feel that the gap between 'haves' and 'have nots' is ever widening)

I'd also like to give my kids the chance to grow up in an environment like my own childhood.

But I do appreciate that the grass is always greener on the other side, which is what your'e wrestling with.

The fact is, youve had a go, experienced something new and different and for better or worse, you can say you did it. Thats good enough for me.

Even PB can say that and we'd all agree for once!!!
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:18 pm
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The cheerful about life interests me. Im very miserable at the moment and when I try to define it I get told to 'go back home then'. Its like I cant comment on the very country that I contribute my taxes to because peole keep taking it the wrong way. They are actually looking for negatives before I finish talking!
Generalise all you like, its nice to see someone else who's brave enough to do it!
Well there's no knowing if we will remain broke or not in oz, but Ive been broke in both countries and Oz won hands down. Cost me naught to sit on a piece of grass with a good book and nice scenery. Had friendly people everywhere-didnt have to travel halfway accross London on terible transport system to get some hugs in.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:21 pm
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Good stuff team, thought provoking stuff,

I myself have completed my skills assessment and am now wondering wether to bother completing my visa application.

We visited Perth last month and for 50% of the time there we thought 'yeah, lets go' and the other 50%? I prefer home.

The thing that put us off going - I really believe in 'the other man's grass' I reckon the diversity of everything (weather, people, places) makes the UK interesting.

The sad fact is, you always look back with rose coloured glasses!
Old jobs seem great, school days seem great, holidays always seemed great!

If we're 50/50 about going why not just say, forget it, then you don't have to go through the sheer hassle and stress.

Any pointers anyone??!!

Johnno
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:26 pm
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Default Re: following my heart

Originally posted by Ruthyman


Ive lived in the UK for 6 years and its been exciting, vibrant and fulfilling ,hard work and scary and lonely...and I have friends and a daughter who are pommies. I lived in and out of London

But ironically, the minute I step foot onto Australia im going to miss all the things in the UK that are pissing me off right now.

Does anyone else ever feel this way?

I cant be complicating the matter. Im going to follow my heart. It might just lead me back here one day, that's all.
Ruth

I can definitely understand what you're talking about. I'm in the same situation too.

Have now lived back in the UK for 10 years and I'm taking him outdoors and my 4 year old daughter back to Australia in September.

Like you, I've enjoyed meeting so many new people and have made some fantastic friends. My 2 closest girlfriends are my daughter's godparents and they are both devastated that we're moving. But luckily they understand the reasons and I know that they will stay in touch and probably visit regularly.

My only regret is taking the only grandchild from my other halfs parents. They have been really supportive and also understand why we are moving but it's still going to be hard to say goodbye to them.

I look back at my life in Australia growing up and I try not to compare it to what growing up in the UK is like, but I really want the best for my daughter and I can only use the knowledge of my childhood years growing up in Oz, which I loved.

As moving time gets closer, it's getting more and more stressful but hopefully once we get out there, things will soon become a bit more relaxed.

Regards
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:30 pm
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Originally posted by Ruthyman
The cheerful about life interests me. Im very miserable at the moment and when I try to define it I get told to 'go back home then'. Its like I cant comment on the very country that I contribute my taxes to because peole keep taking it the wrong way. They are actually looking for negatives before I finish talking!
Generalise all you like, its nice to see someone else who's brave enough to do it!
Well there's no knowing if we will remain broke or not in oz, but Ive been broke in both countries and Oz won hands down. Cost me naught to sit on a piece of grass with a good book and nice scenery. Had friendly people everywhere-didnt have to travel halfway accross London on terible transport system to get some hugs in.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:35 pm
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Originally posted by John Haines

The sad fact is, you always look back with rose coloured glasses!
Old jobs seem great, school days seem great, holidays always seemed great!

Johnno
Well said, the past always does seem to be remembered fondly. I remember school being a great time of my life, but if i really think about it i can remember some occasions at school that were'nt maybe quite that good

The thing i am going like is a change. Something a bit different is always exciting, will keep you on your toes. Some people will sit back in relax into a comfortable easy life that they have made for themselves. Im always keen to see what i can find thats a bit better !
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:40 pm
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Hey Jonno
1)Thing about Perth is it really is out in the sticks. I had some mates who moved there for Sydney and then moved back within about 4 months.
I would never say Perth, but then Im a sydneysider bound for melbourne!

2)Its expensive to re-locate but its also expensive being a 26 year old in London. When I think about the money i 'wasted' on having a good time......but I cant regret it.
I would however regret not giving my family a chance in oz.

Why are you moving Jonno?
London was right for me for a good 4 years but the last two have been wrong time wrong place.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 12:56 pm
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Good Question Ruthyman!!

We have a 3 year old and a 1 year old, I guess we're sick of not having anywhere to go at weekends as the weather's always sh*t.

We did suffer from the heat while we were there, but it was 32º and you do get used to it right?! Lots of storys while we were there of 'when its in the 40s', but thats not very often is it?

The beaches were great but they're not everything....
more important than that was just lounging around in the shade without worrying about wrapping up, that was ace!

One of the main things that puts us off is that there are not many places to go outside of Perth. We travelled down south to Margarets, etc, and did that area. Where is there after that?!

Like I said, we dont seem that bothered about it now, we can't afford to go and 'give it a go' as we dont want to mess up the kids, the decision we make in the next few months is one we'll stick with for the next 18 years.....
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Old May 22nd 2003, 1:06 pm
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Originally posted by John Haines
The sad fact is, you always look back with rose coloured glasses!
Old jobs seem great, school days seem great, holidays always seemed great!

Johnno
I've highlighted part of your post for a reason and that is simply this, turn those words around and think of the future.

What do you see in another 10-20 yrs by staying put?
If you've got kids, what future do you think they have in the UK?

IMO, instead of looking back keep you thoughts on the future, every day you live(if you call it living) is yet one more day gone, thinking like this is great way to focus what you want. The past has gone and should not be forgotten, but the present & future is the key in making the decision for us all

Last edited by GetMeOutOfHere; May 22nd 2003 at 2:15 pm.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 1:12 pm
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Originally posted by GetMeOutOfHere
The past has gone and should not be forgotten, but the present & future is the key in making the decision for us all
The Temporal Frontier. Hack your way through the wilderness of time.
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Old May 22nd 2003, 1:17 pm
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Originally posted by Megalania
The Temporal Frontier. Hack your way through the wilderness of time.
Please indulge me more
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