fific

Just got back from first visit back to the UK. Expected to have a good time with family and frineds but also to be reminded of why we left. But that didnt happen - the first bit did - meeting up with family and friends and enjoying being back in the heart of it, but surprisingly the Uk looked good too, beautiful countryside that I walked in everyday with dogs ( off leash) - beautiful light evenings, great english pubs, lots of interesting intelligent conversation at every turn and great banter and humour. I just loved it - London looked amazing ( and I thought melbourne was good) but all that architecture that I didnt notice before and the culture and festivals. I found people to be friendly and helpful and generally thought England had scrubbed up well in the last 2 years - only area of disappointment was bad coffee and in some places people being very fat.

Have come back feeling empty and flat and wondering what is the value of being here - sunshine and beach that's about it - I have made good friends here but they can't compare with friends and family of a lifetime. Has anyone else felt the same - how do you re-adjust?

sammyg

Where do you live in aus?

We are heading back next year and we are very happy here (gold Coast) but we were in the UK too, so it will be interesting !!!

fific

WE live on the sunshine coast - we were pretty happy in UK when we left thought it would be a good opportunity - but in hindsight - think we were a bit too old ( mid forties) as our freindships were very well established and long standing and where you raise your children will always have a deep connection for you. Here we have enjoyed the scenery and got a good social life but work has been a struggle (finding it and enjoying it)- and we find the laid back approach not very stimulating - even the kids comment on it - their friends have little drive or ambition - we are seen as a bit odd as we have careers that we enjoy and have got a few years left in us yet. Maybe we're just too English to fit in properly here.

kar-kier

I've no intention of going back anytime soon, for exactly those reasons!!

sammyg

I understand that, sometimes i wonder if my daughter is just 'too English' (12 yr old) but things do seem to be getting better. She loves her History (wars etc) and she misses the culture but she can always go and stay with family when shes old enough for a few months i suppose (i do feel guilty though!)

The thing is England and Australia are two countries that have a lot going for them so it's a hard choice but at least with a passport for the 2 options are always open!!

quoll

Yup, makes you realize what you have thrown away. Probably better if you never go home and resign yourself to what you've got even if it is second best. But I do agree, the coffee is cr*p especially when you have Starbucks as the best they can offer!

spartacus

Cor lummy . . . abandon hope all ye who enter here!

asprilla

hmm... sounds like perhaps the UK is calling you home ! Perhaps you and your family should spend some time thinking about whether a move back is an option that you would all be in favour of?

If you make the necessary plans you can always leave the door open for your return, should you change your mind.

Something to think about anyway. I don't envy you being in this dilemma. I'll be back in the uk for 4weeks shortly and I don't anticipate that I will feel the same way... but who knows?

Best of luck !

kporte

I just visited after 2 years and couldn't wait to get back. Probably never go back again. Nothing negative about the UK, I enjoyed my trip, but this feels like home now.

rinkerdink

Go back for 3-6 months and you'll be in the dark nights and mornings as well as the summer time for a more balanced comparison. It is surprising how quickly you catch up with friends and then find them far less interesting than you did on arrival back. Being a traveller sets you apart from most, the drive and get up and go just isn't there for most people and it is something I still find frustrating, can't wait to get down under now.

As for the buildings, undeniably the UK has some of the most historic places in the world... I think the reason people notice it when they come back is cause they are in tourist mode. I walk past historic building everyday and like most of the work force I don't even look up while barging through the hordes of tourists gazing in wonder for the flip side check how many of the travelling Aussies have seen anything of Oz, I have seen more than most of the ones I speak to and I was only there 8 months and yet they go on weekend trips to europe all the time

RedT

Couldn't agree more with this post. I always hear from people how wonderful it must be to live in London. Not really! Anywhere looks fab when you're a tourist and you're not battling your way through morning commuter crowds, queueing 15 mins just to get a sammich at lunchtime, walking home in the rain/dark evenings/everything is too expensive etc etc. When you're on holiday there's no pressure, no hassle so of course you're seeing the best of it. We deliberately travelled at rush hour when we were in Sydney in 2007 and intend doing the same when we're validating in a few weeks, going to try and get a proper feel for what it would be like to do on a daily basis. I'm sure it'll knock some of the shine off!!

My sister and family moved back to Ireland from the US a few years ago after being pestered by family and being made feel like they were missing out on SO much (birthdays, christmas etc). Within about 6 months or less they were completely bored but are now pretty much stuck there and regret moving home. Their friends were mad keen to see them for the first few weeks, once they'd caught up the novelty wore off and it's the same old same old they left behind.

fish.01

The area you have chosen is famous for its lack of jobs and laid back approach....a lot of people move there to get away from drive and ambition - not all mind you as obviously there are some great business's there that don't run themselves

Maybe you have chosen the wrong location as south east Qld has a variety of life styles?

fific

I think you're right about the location - but I am loathe to move the family around Australia looking for the right place - as for friends losing interest - in my case these are friends that I have had for a very long time - and whilst we will all get on with our lives these are people who are extremely unlikely to lose interest. We werent in tourist mode much when we were back - my family lives in London ( not that I ever would) in fact much of what we did was low key and fairly ordinary - it was the simple things like walking in the woods and going to the pub we really enjoyed - we took parents to the doctors, helped friends move, babysat, did the shopping, fixed washing machines etc - and it was this ordinariness that was so lovely. I am just struggling to find the added value of being in Aus that's worth giving up these relationships and fairly simple lifestyle. As for travelling, in order to make a living in Aus I have to travel interstate most weeks - I think I could handle the busy train , or the M4 as an alternative to airports and red-eye travel. Thanks however for the viewpoints - this is what I am asking for so I can consider our position.

fish.01

Not sure you would have to start with the around Australia option. Just that specific location you have chosen is very laid back with high unemployment - you could move 100km down the road to parts of Brisbane and have a totally different experience. Obviously this is just one part of the whole puzzle of deciding.

Olibeneli

We re-adjusted by moving back to the UK.

Now, wherever I go for whatever reason, I take note of my wonderfull surroundings I did not know I would miss until I did not have them anymore.

In this regard, there is a lot of wonderful things to look at close to hand in the UK and you don't have to travel miles and miles to see it. Not so in Oz I don't feel - you have to travel great distances to see a varied array of things.

Anyways, besides all that, my best mates and mum and dad are now a short trip in the car away and not a 24 hour expensive flight.

My mum & dad saw thier eldest grandson in a school play last week and those moments of joy for me was both my son and seeing my parents enjoy their grand kids. I am sure it is enhancing both my sons and my parents lives.