Fighting for her life Downunder.
Jun 15th 2004, 11:57 pm
#16
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2004
Location: South Australia
Posts: 112
Aussies helping the "battlers"
Sorry to hear of the bad news mate.
Have you had any offers of help yet from the Australian community near you???
If there is one thing I know about Australians, if you are in strife, they all get together and help out.
Bush fires . . .cyclone damage . . . floods . . . sickness
Give the local newspaper a ring explaining you are from England.
Ring the local radio station and tell them your position and get ready for all the help coming your way like you will never experience in the UK
Bob and Ginnie
Have you had any offers of help yet from the Australian community near you???
If there is one thing I know about Australians, if you are in strife, they all get together and help out.
Bush fires . . .cyclone damage . . . floods . . . sickness
Give the local newspaper a ring explaining you are from England.
Ring the local radio station and tell them your position and get ready for all the help coming your way like you will never experience in the UK
Bob and Ginnie
Jun 16th 2004, 12:12 am
#17
She's a bird, you know
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 7,655
David, reading your post brought a tear to my eye, because just 5 months ago, this was me with my mum.
My mum has breast cancer which has spread to her bones. Initially they told us it had spread to her liver and that she would have a matter of weeks to live. We prepared ourselves for it while they did more tests and, for a while, life unravelled. My mum has always been as fit as a fiddle and had none of the symptoms of breast cancer - she was 56 at the time (early Feb), and we were told that she wouldn't reach her 57th birthday (end of Feb). SHe was in excruitating pain from the cancer in her bones, screaming in agony and sobbing like a child.
But things weren't as bad as the suspected. They're still bad, but it's all relative. Like Steph, we were told that my mum cannot be cured, because the cancer has become secondary. The best we could hope for was remission, for however long. 6 months ago, that news would be devastating, but now things are different.
They were incredibly lucky to have spotted my mum's cancer, due to a conscientious chiropractor and a fortunate x-ray. Otherwise she would have been dead by the end of this year. She doesn't have to have surgery or chemo, which is a huge blessing. She's had a short course of radiotherapy and is on hormone medication. And I can honestly say that she has never looked better. It's amazing.
What I'm trying to say is that you mustn't lose hope. You mustn't assume that any lack of a cure is an immediate death sentence. As my mum's consultant said to her, he has patients with cancers older than he is. People can live with cancer for years and if it is picked up early, often a reasonably normal life can be lead.
My way of dealing with it was always to prepare for the worst, but hope for the best. I can't stress how important keeping positive is, even if that sounds glib, or seems impossible. Sometimes it is almost impossible. But in my mind, until someone has breathed their last breath, there is life and there is hope. You have Steph now - she hasn't gone anywhere yet, and that's what you have to hold on to. Cancer of soft tissues (ie organs) is always more difficult to treat, so the fact that it has not spread to these organs is good news indeed.
Get proactive, get figthing. Read books, get online, talk to people, get all the information you can so that you know what you are up against. Ask questions, find a local hospice for their support. Get Steph to wage war on the cancer and downright refuse to let it beat her. There are so many studies on the roll of a positive attitude in cancer treatment that it's worth taking note of them.
But make time for yourself so that you can get things straight in you own mind. My dad had a nervous breakdown when my mum was first diagnosed so I was doing all the coping on my own, putting everything to the back of my mind so that I could keep going and hold everyone together. And that stuff you've pushed away doesn't stay away - it will come back, usually when you least expect it, which is what happened to me last month.
I found this forum perhaps the biggest source of strength, support, practical advice and a virtual shoulder to cry on while I was dealing with all this.
I'll be thinking of you all and sending you luck and good vibes everyone else sent me and my mum.
Bundy
My mum has breast cancer which has spread to her bones. Initially they told us it had spread to her liver and that she would have a matter of weeks to live. We prepared ourselves for it while they did more tests and, for a while, life unravelled. My mum has always been as fit as a fiddle and had none of the symptoms of breast cancer - she was 56 at the time (early Feb), and we were told that she wouldn't reach her 57th birthday (end of Feb). SHe was in excruitating pain from the cancer in her bones, screaming in agony and sobbing like a child.
But things weren't as bad as the suspected. They're still bad, but it's all relative. Like Steph, we were told that my mum cannot be cured, because the cancer has become secondary. The best we could hope for was remission, for however long. 6 months ago, that news would be devastating, but now things are different.
They were incredibly lucky to have spotted my mum's cancer, due to a conscientious chiropractor and a fortunate x-ray. Otherwise she would have been dead by the end of this year. She doesn't have to have surgery or chemo, which is a huge blessing. She's had a short course of radiotherapy and is on hormone medication. And I can honestly say that she has never looked better. It's amazing.
What I'm trying to say is that you mustn't lose hope. You mustn't assume that any lack of a cure is an immediate death sentence. As my mum's consultant said to her, he has patients with cancers older than he is. People can live with cancer for years and if it is picked up early, often a reasonably normal life can be lead.
My way of dealing with it was always to prepare for the worst, but hope for the best. I can't stress how important keeping positive is, even if that sounds glib, or seems impossible. Sometimes it is almost impossible. But in my mind, until someone has breathed their last breath, there is life and there is hope. You have Steph now - she hasn't gone anywhere yet, and that's what you have to hold on to. Cancer of soft tissues (ie organs) is always more difficult to treat, so the fact that it has not spread to these organs is good news indeed.
Get proactive, get figthing. Read books, get online, talk to people, get all the information you can so that you know what you are up against. Ask questions, find a local hospice for their support. Get Steph to wage war on the cancer and downright refuse to let it beat her. There are so many studies on the roll of a positive attitude in cancer treatment that it's worth taking note of them.
But make time for yourself so that you can get things straight in you own mind. My dad had a nervous breakdown when my mum was first diagnosed so I was doing all the coping on my own, putting everything to the back of my mind so that I could keep going and hold everyone together. And that stuff you've pushed away doesn't stay away - it will come back, usually when you least expect it, which is what happened to me last month.
I found this forum perhaps the biggest source of strength, support, practical advice and a virtual shoulder to cry on while I was dealing with all this.
I'll be thinking of you all and sending you luck and good vibes everyone else sent me and my mum.
Bundy
Jun 16th 2004, 12:35 am
#18
You sip .... I glug !!!
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Over the hill!
Posts: 2,790
David,
dont really know what to say except we're sorry such a rotten illness has happened to your wife and we hope that the treatment works.
All the best to you and your family.
M&C
PS. here are some virtual flowers for Stepanie
dont really know what to say except we're sorry such a rotten illness has happened to your wife and we hope that the treatment works.
All the best to you and your family.
M&C
PS. here are some virtual flowers for Stepanie
Jun 16th 2004, 12:37 am
#19
She's Diddy, He's Not
Joined: Apr 2004
Location: Gold Coast - just like Felixstowe
Posts: 2,454
David,
Haven't spoken to you before mate, but just wanted to give you my and my family's best wishes.
Thanks for sharing this with us all at this difficult stage. You and your whole family are incredibly brave.
Keep it up mate and I wish your wife all the best in her treatment.
Let us know how it all goes over the coming months.
Paul.
Haven't spoken to you before mate, but just wanted to give you my and my family's best wishes.
Thanks for sharing this with us all at this difficult stage. You and your whole family are incredibly brave.
Keep it up mate and I wish your wife all the best in her treatment.
Let us know how it all goes over the coming months.
Paul.
Jun 16th 2004, 12:37 am
#20
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: Sussex
Posts: 1,927
My thoughts are with you during this time.
footie xx
footie xx
Jun 16th 2004, 12:44 am
#21
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Brentwood, Essex but Adelaide bound
Posts: 397
So sorry to hear what a tough time you and your wife are having.
Sending positive thoughts your way...
olive
Sending positive thoughts your way...
olive
Jun 16th 2004, 12:48 am
#22
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2004
Location: Sydney
Posts: 118
David,
First of all let me say that my thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.
Secondly let me tell you about 2 of my friends who were also diagnosed with incurable cancer.
The first was diagnosed as a teenager and told the best he could hope for was remission. He's still in remission and he's now in his thirties.
The second was diagnosed and told he had at best 6 months to live, that was 11 years ago.
Both these people have strong characters and refused to accept what was seen as their fate. They both live life to the full and often put me to shame with their positive attitude and outlook.
Good luck.
First of all let me say that my thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.
Secondly let me tell you about 2 of my friends who were also diagnosed with incurable cancer.
The first was diagnosed as a teenager and told the best he could hope for was remission. He's still in remission and he's now in his thirties.
The second was diagnosed and told he had at best 6 months to live, that was 11 years ago.
Both these people have strong characters and refused to accept what was seen as their fate. They both live life to the full and often put me to shame with their positive attitude and outlook.
Good luck.
Jun 16th 2004, 12:51 am
#23
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 987
David sorry to hear about your wife my thoughts are with you.The fact that your children are happy may help things a little.
Take Care Gaynor
Take Care Gaynor
Jun 16th 2004, 1:25 am
#24
I'm PR Now!! Yeah!!
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Georges Hall, NSW
Posts: 192
David
All our best wishes to you and your family... Keep strong.
Sam&Andy
All our best wishes to you and your family... Keep strong.
Sam&Andy
Jun 16th 2004, 1:25 am
#25
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Port Kennedy WA
Posts: 556
Hi
So sorry to hear about your wife, hope everything goes well with her treatment, sure your in the best place, thinking of you.
Yve x
So sorry to hear about your wife, hope everything goes well with her treatment, sure your in the best place, thinking of you.
Yve x
Jun 16th 2004, 1:40 am
#26
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2003
Location: Mornington, Victoria (10 mins from the beach!!!)
Posts: 335
Re: Fighting for her life Downunder.
Originally posted by DavidT
Sorry I havn't posted for a while, I have had some bad news regarding my wife Stephanie, she has had to go into hospital recently after being fast tracked by a Haematologist who is concerned about his diagnosis which has been confirmed as Myeloma which is Cancer.
It basically attacks all the good blood cells in the bones which makes them become degenerate, compress or fracture. She has had the bone marrow test, she has started on a course of tablets to strengthen the bones & attack the disease. She is now on her 2nd treatment of chemotherapy & a few weeks away from a bone marrow transplant.
It is a very rare disease so they are hopeful for her, it generally affects older people. We are fortunate that Princess Alexander hospital in Brisbane is one of the best blood units in the world & the diagnosis has been picked up so quickly. Our consultant made the appointment for the following morning while we were at our initial consultation.
On the bleak side it is quite bleak, but we may have caught it early enough to give her the best possible chance.
The kids are fine & suspect little & I will keep it that way for the forseeable future.
3 Days later
Steph has had lots of tests, her organs are fine as the disease hasn't got at them which is good. she has no more breaks in her bones 3 fractures in her back causing immense discomfort.
The staff & facilities are fantastic & they are so proffesional, it was a blessing that we came over even if it was just to save her life, which is what we won't find out for some time yet. If we had of been back in the uk, we would of been none the wiser for a while & even then may not of got this kind of priority treatment.
Were hopeful but don't want to ask those questions just yet, we will wait a while, the best we can hope for is remission, they have said she will not do any better than that, but we remain positive.
The kids are happier than i have ever seen them, it's quite incredible really how they have slipped into this life, but they say that about kids don't they, I suppose getting all this fresh air & sunshine, plus there own way all the time is just how we would of liked it as children.
Will write again soon, love David. xxx
Sorry I havn't posted for a while, I have had some bad news regarding my wife Stephanie, she has had to go into hospital recently after being fast tracked by a Haematologist who is concerned about his diagnosis which has been confirmed as Myeloma which is Cancer.
It basically attacks all the good blood cells in the bones which makes them become degenerate, compress or fracture. She has had the bone marrow test, she has started on a course of tablets to strengthen the bones & attack the disease. She is now on her 2nd treatment of chemotherapy & a few weeks away from a bone marrow transplant.
It is a very rare disease so they are hopeful for her, it generally affects older people. We are fortunate that Princess Alexander hospital in Brisbane is one of the best blood units in the world & the diagnosis has been picked up so quickly. Our consultant made the appointment for the following morning while we were at our initial consultation.
On the bleak side it is quite bleak, but we may have caught it early enough to give her the best possible chance.
The kids are fine & suspect little & I will keep it that way for the forseeable future.
3 Days later
Steph has had lots of tests, her organs are fine as the disease hasn't got at them which is good. she has no more breaks in her bones 3 fractures in her back causing immense discomfort.
The staff & facilities are fantastic & they are so proffesional, it was a blessing that we came over even if it was just to save her life, which is what we won't find out for some time yet. If we had of been back in the uk, we would of been none the wiser for a while & even then may not of got this kind of priority treatment.
Were hopeful but don't want to ask those questions just yet, we will wait a while, the best we can hope for is remission, they have said she will not do any better than that, but we remain positive.
The kids are happier than i have ever seen them, it's quite incredible really how they have slipped into this life, but they say that about kids don't they, I suppose getting all this fresh air & sunshine, plus there own way all the time is just how we would of liked it as children.
Will write again soon, love David. xxx
Jun 16th 2004, 1:40 am
#27
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: May 2004
Location: Birkdale QLD
Posts: 7,642
Hi David - we haven't met but just want to let you know that you, Stephanie and your children are in our prayers. Stay positive.
All the best,
JTL & Mrs JTL
All the best,
JTL & Mrs JTL
Jun 16th 2004, 1:40 am
#28
From U.K 2 Aus
Joined: May 2004
Location: Chester U.K
Posts: 48
Re: Fighting for her life Downunder.
David & Family
I know were you are at! Lost my Father lost his battle or should l say outright war against cancer some 10 years ago. When diagnosed doctors told my mum that he would only live around 3 months.
He battled for 3.5 years. The bravest man l have ever met!
Keep strong, keep up the fight and keep loving each other. Your childrens happiness will be a source of energy for your wife - l know we were for my father.
Never met you/spoken to you in the past, but am sending some positive healing thoughts to you all. Wishing you all nothing but the very very best for the future.
Love & Hugs
I know were you are at! Lost my Father lost his battle or should l say outright war against cancer some 10 years ago. When diagnosed doctors told my mum that he would only live around 3 months.
He battled for 3.5 years. The bravest man l have ever met!
Keep strong, keep up the fight and keep loving each other. Your childrens happiness will be a source of energy for your wife - l know we were for my father.
Never met you/spoken to you in the past, but am sending some positive healing thoughts to you all. Wishing you all nothing but the very very best for the future.
Love & Hugs
Jun 16th 2004, 1:48 am
#29
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Perth WA
Posts: 712
Just wanted to add my very best wishes to you all. I truly hope your wife can beat this and wish her luck in her fight. You look after yourself and the kids so you can be a support to her and all keep positive. Let us know how you go on.
Thinking of you
Loopy
Thinking of you
Loopy
Jun 16th 2004, 1:58 am
#30
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2004
Location: Nelson, NZ
Posts: 54
Re: Fighting for her life Downunder.
Dear David
Wishing you and your family the very best of luck. Will say an extra prayer for you.
Andrea jc
Wishing you and your family the very best of luck. Will say an extra prayer for you.
Andrea jc
Originally posted by DavidT
Sorry I havn't posted for a while, I have had some bad news regarding my wife Stephanie, she has had to go into hospital recently after being fast tracked by a Haematologist who is concerned about his diagnosis which has been confirmed as Myeloma which is Cancer.
It basically attacks all the good blood cells in the bones which makes them become degenerate, compress or fracture. She has had the bone marrow test, she has started on a course of tablets to strengthen the bones & attack the disease. She is now on her 2nd treatment of chemotherapy & a few weeks away from a bone marrow transplant.
It is a very rare disease so they are hopeful for her, it generally affects older people. We are fortunate that Princess Alexander hospital in Brisbane is one of the best blood units in the world & the diagnosis has been picked up so quickly. Our consultant made the appointment for the following morning while we were at our initial consultation.
On the bleak side it is quite bleak, but we may have caught it early enough to give her the best possible chance.
The kids are fine & suspect little & I will keep it that way for the forseeable future.
3 Days later
Steph has had lots of tests, her organs are fine as the disease hasn't got at them which is good. she has no more breaks in her bones 3 fractures in her back causing immense discomfort.
The staff & facilities are fantastic & they are so proffesional, it was a blessing that we came over even if it was just to save her life, which is what we won't find out for some time yet. If we had of been back in the uk, we would of been none the wiser for a while & even then may not of got this kind of priority treatment.
Were hopeful but don't want to ask those questions just yet, we will wait a while, the best we can hope for is remission, they have said she will not do any better than that, but we remain positive.
The kids are happier than i have ever seen them, it's quite incredible really how they have slipped into this life, but they say that about kids don't they, I suppose getting all this fresh air & sunshine, plus there own way all the time is just how we would of liked it as children.
Will write again soon, love David. xxx
Sorry I havn't posted for a while, I have had some bad news regarding my wife Stephanie, she has had to go into hospital recently after being fast tracked by a Haematologist who is concerned about his diagnosis which has been confirmed as Myeloma which is Cancer.
It basically attacks all the good blood cells in the bones which makes them become degenerate, compress or fracture. She has had the bone marrow test, she has started on a course of tablets to strengthen the bones & attack the disease. She is now on her 2nd treatment of chemotherapy & a few weeks away from a bone marrow transplant.
It is a very rare disease so they are hopeful for her, it generally affects older people. We are fortunate that Princess Alexander hospital in Brisbane is one of the best blood units in the world & the diagnosis has been picked up so quickly. Our consultant made the appointment for the following morning while we were at our initial consultation.
On the bleak side it is quite bleak, but we may have caught it early enough to give her the best possible chance.
The kids are fine & suspect little & I will keep it that way for the forseeable future.
3 Days later
Steph has had lots of tests, her organs are fine as the disease hasn't got at them which is good. she has no more breaks in her bones 3 fractures in her back causing immense discomfort.
The staff & facilities are fantastic & they are so proffesional, it was a blessing that we came over even if it was just to save her life, which is what we won't find out for some time yet. If we had of been back in the uk, we would of been none the wiser for a while & even then may not of got this kind of priority treatment.
Were hopeful but don't want to ask those questions just yet, we will wait a while, the best we can hope for is remission, they have said she will not do any better than that, but we remain positive.
The kids are happier than i have ever seen them, it's quite incredible really how they have slipped into this life, but they say that about kids don't they, I suppose getting all this fresh air & sunshine, plus there own way all the time is just how we would of liked it as children.
Will write again soon, love David. xxx
