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-   -   did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it. (https://britishexpats.com/forum/australia-54/did-anyone-go-home-after-6-mths-now-regret-532322/)

lisas Apr 26th 2008 11:23 am

did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
We are so confused as we have been here for over 6 mths and cannot decide whether to go home or not.

We live on the G.C and think that maybe a move to Melbourne would be more to our liking. However it's going to cost quite a bit of money (that we don't really have) which in turn is making us think that when we get to Melbourne we may not be happy there either and will have spent all that money moving and having to start from scratch again, not knowing areas and no rental (we all know how hard it is to get one of those).

I know it's a personal decision and i have asked similar before but has anyone else packed up and gone back home after 6 mths and either regretted it or realized that OZ wasn't for them and are happier back in Blighty.

We were advised by quite a few people over here to go back to the UK for a couple of weeks as they have seen so many people yoyo back and forth with all their belongings that they advised going back for a holiday would probably sway us one way or another. Having just come back from 10 days in the UK we have realized that Blighty wasn't really that bad and the only thing that bothered us was the rubbish weather. In just 6 months away from home things have changed as there are more Europeans from places such as Poland yet even this didn't bother us as it made us realise what a culturally diverse and tolerant place the UK is. It would be so easy to settle back into life at home, but on the other hand we don't want to throw away an opportunity that we know a lot of people would give their right arm for. We know australia has the lifestyle and the weather and that there are far worse places to live. We also know that perhaps we haven't been here long enough to settle in but when you have doubts it is hard to give it your all. Also the fact that for us we are worse off here and that it seems more expensive than the UK and has far less choice is disconcerting.

I think we are scared of missing out. We would probably go home but know that if we stay two years we can get a passport and keep our options open as who knows how we'll feel in 10 years time. If we went home we may have kids then regret that we've blown our chance and may wish we had stayed as the outdoor lifestyle offers more for kids than the UK. However if we are unhappy now, how likely is it that after 2 years we will stay longer or go home and ever use aussie citizenship again?

I guess we truly are whinging poms, but I guess for some it is easier to settle than others.

We would like to hear from anyone who has been in a similar position to us and would like to hear how they handled their situation.

Down Under and Loving It Apr 26th 2008 11:30 am

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
[give it another 6 months at least,it will start feeling like home.At first we compared everythink with the uk ,but you tend to forget the uk after time

scrubbedexpat001 Apr 26th 2008 11:43 am

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
Hi lisas,

I know where your coming from and it can be a very difficult decision to make. We (me British, Wife & Son Aussies) moved form the UK to Sydney in Sept 2001 and went back to the UK about 9 months later in June 2002 (but we didn't go back to the place where we came from). We had our reasons for going back and whilst we ended up with good jobs & met a good bunch of people to be honest I know that I never really settled back there.

We moved back to Perth in Nov 2007 so I had to apply for Visa again which was a bit expensive (other 2 are Aussies so they were ok) and whilst we've only been here a short while I I don't think we'll be going back to the UK any time soon (not even for a holiday). I think coming back is probably the best decision we've made in a while and I guess things may have been different if we'd tried somewhere else back in 2002 before going back to the UK (we thought about it but didn't).

I guess people here can give all sorts of advice but at the end of the day you have to go where your heart (or head) pulls you and it can be a difficult decision. Best thing to do is talk it through with your partner and try to decide if you want to give it a little longer, try somewhere new or cut your losses and go back to Blighty.

lisas Apr 26th 2008 11:53 am

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
Thanks for your post it's really interesting to see how other people have dealt with similar situations. It's such a difficult decision to make and we are scared of making the wrong choice but i guess we've just got to make a decision go with it and try not to have any regrets.

Cheetah7 Apr 26th 2008 11:56 am

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by lisas (Post 6268398)
We are so confused as we have been here for over 6 mths and cannot decide whether to go home or not.


Originally Posted by lisas (Post 6268398)


It would be so easy to settle back into life at home, but on the other hand we don't want to throw away an opportunity that we know a lot of people would give their right arm for.




Never make a huge decision when you are feeling confused or unclear about it, if you cannot decide whether or not to go home, then stay put until things are clearer - give it a bit more time. Start to refer to Australia as 'home' because if you keep looking backwards to what you had, you will never progress.

This is YOUR opportunity and while others may 'give their right arm for it', that doesn't count, it has to be you that has to be prepared to do similar.

Sometimes the easy route is not always the best.;)

ShoreyM Apr 26th 2008 12:05 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
I think only you will know what to do, people's perceptions differ greatly on these things. I am stuck in the UK, still waiting to get over there so I can't comment on how I'll feel after 6 months. However, I can comment on the UK at the moment. Although I live in a good area, there are huge problems in other areas with crime etc. I know this has always been the case but the eastern europeans are increasing the crime rates hugely. This is well documented in the press also. The authorities seem unable to cope and people literally get away with murder. The education system is struggling to accomodate imigrants also, fortunes spent on children who can't speak english, meaning funds taken from a struggling system anyway.The same can be said for the health care. The Manufacturing and Production Industry is slowly dying.Things are just starting to get bad now, give it 5 years or so and I for one don't want to be here to see it.

Assegai Apr 26th 2008 12:24 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by lisas (Post 6268398)
We are so confused as we have been here for over 6 mths and cannot decide whether to go home or not.

We live on the G.C and think that maybe a move to Melbourne would be more to our liking. However it's going to cost quite a bit of money (that we don't really have) which in turn is making us think that when we get to Melbourne we may not be happy there either and will have spent all that money moving and having to start from scratch again, not knowing areas and no rental (we all know how hard it is to get one of those).

I know it's a personal decision and i have asked similar before but has anyone else packed up and gone back home after 6 mths and either regretted it or realized that OZ wasn't for them and are happier back in Blighty.

We were advised by quite a few people over here to go back to the UK for a couple of weeks as they have seen so many people yoyo back and forth with all their belongings that they advised going back for a holiday would probably sway us one way or another. Having just come back from 10 days in the UK we have realized that Blighty wasn't really that bad and the only thing that bothered us was the rubbish weather. In just 6 months away from home things have changed as there are more Europeans from places such as Poland yet even this didn't bother us as it made us realise what a culturally diverse and tolerant place the UK is. It would be so easy to settle back into life at home, but on the other hand we don't want to throw away an opportunity that we know a lot of people would give their right arm for. We know australia has the lifestyle and the weather and that there are far worse places to live. We also know that perhaps we haven't been here long enough to settle in but when you have doubts it is hard to give it your all. Also the fact that for us we are worse off here and that it seems more expensive than the UK and has far less choice is disconcerting.

I think we are scared of missing out. We would probably go home but know that if we stay two years we can get a passport and keep our options open as who knows how we'll feel in 10 years time. If we went home we may have kids then regret that we've blown our chance and may wish we had stayed as the outdoor lifestyle offers more for kids than the UK. However if we are unhappy now, how likely is it that after 2 years we will stay longer or go home and ever use aussie citizenship again?

I guess we truly are whinging poms, but I guess for some it is easier to settle than others.

We would like to hear from anyone who has been in a similar position to us and would like to hear how they handled their situation.

Everbody's different so I can only throw in my tuppenceworth.

Oz is a good place to bring up kids, better than the UK imo, but having lived in several parts of Oz I prefer the UK despite all the problems mentioned by Shorey and this appalling gov't in general.

However you say you live on the GC, not my preferred choice, but I found Brisbane a much better city than Melbourne and if I had to live permantly in Oz again, it would be a toss-up between Brisbane and Sydney.

lisas Apr 26th 2008 12:54 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
Thanks, why did you prefer Brisbane to Melbourne? How long did you live in Oz before you came back? I'm guessing you have no regrets then about leaving Oz. We feel like we have come here 5-10 years to early but we needed to apply for the visa before I turned 30 in order to get in. Did you stay long enough to get citizenship?

The Crow Apr 26th 2008 1:14 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by lisas (Post 6268576)
Thanks, why did you prefer Brisbane to Melbourne? How long did you live in Oz before you came back? I'm guessing you have no regrets then about leaving Oz. We feel like we have come here 5-10 years to early but we needed to apply for the visa before I turned 30 in order to get in. Did you stay long enough to get citizenship?

Just because someone prefers Brisbane to Melbourne, doesn't mean you would. Have you read Buzzy Bee's reccie reports on both - they really capture the difference in a nutshell.

laguna33p Apr 26th 2008 5:43 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 
IMO get your aussie citizenship then you can decide and can always return to aust without the hassle of reapplying for visas.

zerohero Apr 26th 2008 6:20 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by ShoreyM (Post 6268487)
I think only you will know what to do, people's perceptions differ greatly on these things. I am stuck in the UK, still waiting to get over there so I can't comment on how I'll feel after 6 months. However, I can comment on the UK at the moment. Although I live in a good area, there are huge problems in other areas with crime etc. I know this has always been the case but the eastern europeans are increasing the crime rates hugely. This is well documented in the press also. The authorities seem unable to cope and people literally get away with murder. The education system is struggling to accomodate imigrants also, fortunes spent on children who can't speak english, meaning funds taken from a struggling system anyway.The same can be said for the health care. The Manufacturing and Production Industry is slowly dying.Things are just starting to get bad now, give it 5 years or so and I for one don't want to be here to see it.

Why are some British people so naturally negative and pessimistic about their own country? I have seen statements like these from people back in the 1970s (the "good old days" according to some).Things aren't so bad - check this out:
http://www.goodthingsaboutbritain.co.uk/

Cheer up!

Assegai Apr 26th 2008 7:10 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by lisas (Post 6268576)
Thanks, why did you prefer Brisbane to Melbourne? How long did you live in Oz before you came back? I'm guessing you have no regrets then about leaving Oz. We feel like we have come here 5-10 years to early but we needed to apply for the visa before I turned 30 in order to get in. Did you stay long enough to get citizenship?

I loved Brizzie as it was my 1st residence in Oz on my temporary residence visa (sponsored by a printing company) where I stayed a year before moving to Dee Why in Sydney for 2 years. When I went back to Oz for 6 months (on a visitors visa) a little while ago I lived in Perth, Adelaide and Melbourne.

Never had any intention of staying out in Oz permanently as my wife and kids were settled in the UK although they all came over to visit me at various times.

I liked the city centre in Brisbane, Mount Coot-tha (or whatever it's called) the close proximity of Moreton Island, Frazer Island, Sunshine Coast, Gold Coast and Australia Zoo. South Bank with its manmade beaches, restaurants and galleries was a favourite - much better than Melbourne's South Bank.

Melbourne was accessible with regular tram services, similar sized city centre, St Kildas beach too was more accessible than the beaches in Brisbane which are a little way out from the city but I just didn't like the place much, very changeable weather didn't help.

Mally Lass Apr 26th 2008 7:38 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by zerohero (Post 6269353)
Why are some British people so naturally negative and pessimistic about their own country? I have seen statements like these from people back in the 1970s (the "good old days" according to some).Things aren't so bad - check this out:
http://www.goodthingsaboutbritain.co.uk/

Cheer up!

That Website talks of a British Culture that existed in the 60's/70's/80's and Before that ! It's no longer like that and we no longer have a culture............ if we do, please direct me to it ! :confused:

It also speaks of a Heatwave we had back in February THIS YEAR !!!! :eek: What microscopic pocket of the UK did THAT happen in, or was I asleep ????

It also talks heavily of the lovely green Countryside !! Just like Australia (accoreding to the site) that's great for a holiday, but believe me, 'having' to drive through country lanes reversing for the 'yokals' every five minutes, ruining your vehicle, always driving through sheep shit or cow shit, following herds of very slow cattle to get to your destination, having your car sprayed almost daily with tractor remnants, and basic living in the Countryside is really no fun at all !! It's great on holiday and a novelty, but novelties soon wear off !

Apart from that, the site gives no positives to the UK other than talking of what Britain has given to the world in the way of Cricket players and Scientists etc, which every Country can do !!

Back on topic : To the OP ...

You have to decide what you like and how you like living and which you prefer and what you are prepared to sacrifice.

I'm a "ping-ponger", so see it from both sides. When we were in Oz we missed so much of the UK (although that wasn't the reason we came back) and hankered for things and people and sceneries and places and familiarities. When we were back here a while, we marvelled in the things we missed, and soon the novelty wore off and wondered why we missed them in the first place !

I think simple familiarity plays a large part in how people feel about it all. I vowed the next time we get to Oz, to familiarise myself with Oz living, as we've already done with UK living, so why keep holding on to it.

:D

laguna33p Apr 26th 2008 8:10 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by zerohero (Post 6269353)
Why are some British people so naturally negative and pessimistic about their own country? I have seen statements like these from people back in the 1970s (the "good old days" according to some).Things aren't so bad - check this out:
http://www.goodthingsaboutbritain.co.uk/

Cheer up!


An immigrant coming to britain believing this website will be very disappointed. The british just have to accept the britain is on it's way to becoming a 3rd world country, even places like india have better lifestyles.

Grayling Apr 26th 2008 9:00 pm

Re: did anyone go home after 6 mths and now regret it.
 

Originally Posted by laguna33p (Post 6269594)
An immigrant coming to britain believing this website will be very disappointed. The british just have to accept the britain is on it's way to becoming a 3rd world country, even places like india have better lifestyles.

Bollocks


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