Scorpio1

1. You want to live near a beach, but get blown away enjoying it.
2. You want a bigger house than you have in the UK, with paper thin walls & no double glazing to keep your noise in and neighbours noise out.
3. You want to re-qualify for everything you're already qualified to do, and pay a hefty price to do so.
4. You like sunny weather for 4 or so months of the year (30 to 40 degrees), just about always accompanied by strong winds, and lots of rain & wind in the other months.
5. You like seeing people wander around with filthy bare feet in public places wearing nothing but shorts & a vest.
6. You like to hear dogs barking 24/7 (that double glazing would be handy again), as they're kept outside over here.
7. You like the constant 'beep-beep' sound of diggers on new (& not so new) estates from before 7am every morning but Sunday.
8. You like bad American TV shows (crime & sitcom), even worse Aussie ones, countless sports (AFL, Cricket) programmes & generally 'lowest common denominator' type programming.
9. You like plenty of TV ad breaks that insult your intelligence with made up 'sales' & SHOUT tactics etc.
10. You think sponsorship of anything & everything is a good thing.
11. You like the sound of your neighbours aircon, pool equipment, kids, dogs etc. & wish to hear all these things through your paper-thin, breeze-block walls & holes in the ceiling where your aircon comes in.
12. You love real sport - you know AFL, AFL, AFL, cricket & rugby.
13. You like to have the words 'Australia', 'Australian' or 'Proudly Australian' rammed down your throat every single day you're here.
14. You really really like that peculiar accent & weird pronunciations of English words.
15. Familiarity with every day things means nothing to you.
16. You thing McDonalds sell quality food.
17. You like flies, lots of them, at certain times of the year.
18. You're a bit common & easy to please.
19. You want to start again job-wise, right at the bottom of the ladder, & build your way up.
20. You don't mind having creatures that could possibly kill you in your back yard & in your house from time to time.
21. You have no style & like being really scruffy & wearing shorts & thongs (flip-flops) all year round.
22. You think mullet hair styles & big moustaches are cool.
23. You like laidback, boring music.
24. You want to get away from your friends & close family - far,far away.
25. You like a lot of pointless rules & regulations.

Well, if you fit the bill come on over, you're going to love it !

Bordy

Glad I love AFL.

wengerboy

now you tell me

moneypenny20

Why should Perth be any different from the rest of the country

Bordy

Wasn't me that said it.
There was nothing wrong with Perth when I visited. Still prefer Melbourne but thats my home.

Vegemite Kids

yawn

take it you'll be leaving then Scorpio ?

Scorpio1

Wrong, my friend, I'm giving this place some much needed class !

Bordy

You should look up Pommie League in Perth, Ive a feeling you will get on like a house on fire.

manxfamily

sounds fantastic, I hope brisbane offers the same!! roll on July 2006, ill get my vest and flip flops ready!!

cranni

One thing i cant understand, and i am really not being horrible, but , why do you stay.
I f i felt the same way you do, i would go back home without a doubt.
Where you happy in UK, have you tried somewhere else in Oz.

Vash the Stampede

You don't need to keep the neighbours' noise out, because you'll have a detached house instead of the terraced/semi-detached dog kennels that most people live in over here.

The old lady who lives next door to my fiance's semi is a big fan of Midsomer Murders; we know this because we have heard (with growing reluctance) every episode she's ever watched.

Same as coming to the UK.

LOL, what a load of cobblers!

Um, what is the problem here, exactly?

Yes that's right, we tend to keep our livestock outside the house. Very different to the UK of course, but that's how we like it.

...matching the ubiquitous and interminable roadworks in the UK, yes. Roadworks which never actually seem to improve the road, but only mess about with it for a few pointless weeks.

Fair cop!

Eh?

You don't hear them, because you live in a detached house at a reasonable distance from your neighbour's. In the UK, you would hear all of this and more through the shared wall of your microscoping semi, which was built in the 19th Century and has yet to be modernised.

...and polo, and water polo, and european football, and swimming, and horseriding, and a million other activities.

They're not, but never mind. Alternatively, you could simply stay in the UK, where it's practically illegal to display the St George's cross under any circumstances.

...which are at least far more homogenous than the UK, where you have a different accent for every street corner and a different dialect for every county.

It's a foreign country; get over it.

LOL, as if!

Fair cop!

Pffft! More like "you prefer an egalitarian society in which your worth as a human being is judged by your character, as opposed to a class-conscious society in which your worth as a human being is judged by your birthright, the location of your house, and the size/quality of your material assests."

Just like coming to the UK.

Just like the UK; only there, the creatures have two legs and are called "chavs."

...all of which is just so tacky when compared to the tasteful garb worn by the average British chav!

Eh?

Just like coming to the UK.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the UK's electrical regulations, lack of repeat prescriptions, mountain of paperwork for bank account applications (for which you will require an appointment; can't do it over the counter, that would be too easy), duplicate paper licenses (no, that plastic card just isn't enough!), individual infrastructure for every single telco provider (um, why not just use the same extension, like we do back home!?), two separate tax file numbers, and a thousand other things I could mention...

Vash the Stampede

Thanks, but we've already got our fair share of "Economy class"; we don't need any more.

cranni

Absolutely fantastic, you hit the nail on the head,i was being polite, Denise in the beautiful south west. and happy with my life with my family and new friends, and so lucky.
.

Hels

Ya know what...am so FED UP with this....I have had a bloody guttful...if you are going to whinge and whine and moan...get it right!! Its not a bloody vest....its a SINGLET!!!

Rooksie

Wait til scossie see THIS!!!!!!