For those of you that don't know me or my Australian story, hubby, two small kiddies and myself moved over to Perth in July 2004. The reason we did this was because a) it was hubby's dream as he'd backpacked many years ago and fallen in love with the place, and b) I'd watched Shirley Valentine way too many times and I was a stuck at home housewife going slightly mental with talking to the walls "Christ Trace, you're only 38, get out and live a bit". So, off to Oz we went.

I think I knew, deep down in my heart, within the first few weeks of landing that I didn't connect with the place at all. I tried over the years to feel at home, to make a life for us all over there, but it was as if I'd left my heart back in England. I missed my family so much, and e-mails and phone calls just didn't cut it and certainly didn't compensate for a hug off my Mum or seeing the kids spend that precious time with their aging grandparents. I'd always wondered, prior to emigrating, how we'd deal with family illness whilst we were so many miles away, and I was to find out in July 2005 when my beloved Dad passed away due to brain cancer. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can prepare you for the range of emotions and shear feeling of helplessness that overwhelm you at a time like that. And, no amount of sunshine or beautiful beaches and living space can fill the void.

I returned from the UK, having sorted out funeral arrangements etc and threw myself back into life in Oz. I am very proud to say I am now the owner of a Bachelor of Education degree thanks to Australia, that's one thing I will always be very grateful for. I made some very good friends there, and also lost a few not so good friends too . I realised just how materialistic some people can be and just how unmaterialistic I was. None of that glitz and shiny stuff impressed me, it has no soul, no character and did not make me willing to replace my family back in the UK with it.

Now, my husband on the other hand, loved his life in Oz, as did our two children. They were all very settled in their lives which obviously added to my utter desperation as I not only had to deal with the gut wrenching feelings of homesickness, I also had to deal with awful feelings of guilt at wanting to move my very happy family back to the UK. I battled with this for years, I even considered moving to another state in Oz wondering whether it was just Perth I disliked. I toddled off on rekkies to Melbourne, Sydney and the Gold Coast, lovely times were had, but I still didn't want to live in any of them.

By the end of 2007 I just couldn't do it anymore. My wonderful husband agreed to move back to the UK He said he couldn't see me sad anymore.

So, here we are. Living in South Devon, in a house that needs a serious amount of TLC but boasts the most amazing views of Dartmoor to compensate it's interior ugliness!

We have only been home for a few weeks and boy, it's been a rollercoaster ride. I assumed, stupidly, I would get off the plane and kiss the ground Pope style I would be so relieved to be home. Not! I can honestly say, in those first few days, if someone had offered me a plane ticket back to Oz I would've grabbed at the chance. I was completely overwhelmed with feelings of "WTF have I done?" it was all too much to take in. However, a few weeks in and things are starting to settle down. The kids are into school now and doing ok. Hubby has started his training course and loving every minute of it. I cannot work until I have my UK police records check. Oh, that reminds me to tell you, the red tape over here is just as silly as in Oz and getting anything done...like the phone connected or the internet put on....takes FOREVER! I'm sat on my Mums computer typing this as we're still not connected at home!

The walks we've done through woodlands and riversides have taken our breaths away, literally! The beauty of this place cannot be matched I don't think. We are looking at the UK through new eyes, with a greater appreciation of the things this country does well. People have asked me why I came back. I refuse to go into a longwinded explanation with them as they wouldn't understand unless they'd lived my Australian life. So I just say "Family" and they seem to let it go and understand.

It is early days for us here, but I can honestly say now those first few crazy days are behind us, hand on heart, if I could turn the clocks back and go back to Aus would I go? No. I no longer wake up with that ache in my stomach of being in a country where I never felt that I belonged. Now I'm home and this is where I do belong. This is my country and I'm very very proud to say that.

For those of you wondering what to do, stay or go, follow your heart. It's usually the right choice.