Brat1

OMG! We've been through every emotion with this one. Anger, tears, sadness. It has been really tough because none of our kids are wanting to move, but me and hubby know we are doing this to hopefully give us a better family life than we've had in the UK. Since the kids were born, we both have worked. I'm a funeral director and work long, long hours and have missed so much of the kids growing up. I have major back problems now, with all the manual lifting work that I've done over the years and have been off for the last 6 months. The kids have had me at home and in that time, I think they realise how much better it is having me at home.

I don't for one minute think that the transition from here to Connecticut is going to be easy, but I really hope that they will eventually benefit from a different lifestyle (I'm going on an H4 so won't be able to work).

Sometimes, as parents, we have to make decisions that our kids don't agree with and hope that we make the right choices for a better future for them.

knconsulting

I have lived here a total of 27 years and the UK for 10. UK beef is much nicer- and that's compared to Wholefoods, and local organic farms (I only eat local/organic as much as possible). Same goes for the veg- a longer growing season in the UK, plus the ability to get it from the groud to your kitchen in a much shorter amount of time makes it taste much better, as they don't lose as much natural sugars in the transport process. Perhaps you haven't been to the UK in a while? When we left last year, I felt the food industry had reached new heights. Thanks is probably due to chefs and campaigners for this kind of quality like Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, Jaime Oliver, and such. I know it is possible to get organic, grass fed, Aberdeen Angus if you really try- but then you pay a fortune.

Englishtart

I saw the same show, FC does look like a nice place, I never went there when I lived in CO, there really isn't much humidity in CO to speak of, it does get pretty hot in Summer and very cold in Winter, lots of snow!

There are lots of people who love CO, it's a great state to live in if you are the out doorsy type, lots of winter sports stuff and water rafting, hil climbing etc. I didn't really enjoy my time there (18 months) but I know that when hubby leaves his job there in April, there will be quite a few people fighting to get it, he has already been contacted by a few guys in other States and it hasn't even been advertised yet!

trottytrue

Brit 1...My only worry for your children is that at their ages children have already made friends and and I think it would be hard enough for them to blend in with the other children in school but they have the added problem of being from another country. They will have to rethink how to spell words, History comes from a different point of view so many small things but when you put them altogether it can be alot for children.
Children can be awfully cruel I have 3 grown children but I do remember what it was like when they where in school trying to fit in, lots of different groups they are so clicky. I would be more worried about the two older children. High School here can be really bad I hope it all works out for you but I dont think its going to be easy for the girls.

Sally Redux

In fairness though, the 16-year-old probably won't be at home much longer - I wish you all the best, but it can be tough reversing the decision with children of that age, if you should find the move is not all that you expected.

Brat1

I'm sure it's not and believe me, we have had several years to think about this (long story). We have not taken this decision lightly and you've now reminded me how hard it could be for the kids, but I still think for us as a family, this is the right decision. Only time will tell.

Englishtart

Hi Brat1, I think that as long as you are expecting/ready for a few issues with the 16 yr old, you should be ok. It's going to be hardest for her I think, in the UK she would have only had a short amount of time left in school, here she will probably have to do 2 years of high school before she would graduate? I don't think the other kids would be mean to your kids in school, they will probably think the 'Brit accent' is cute and that will be a way in for them.

The spelling differences will be a PITA at first, but kids are adaptable, I'm sure the teachers will give them time to adjust, maybe you could mention that when you visit the schools. The history will be different, US history is pretty much all that gets taught in grade school, my son is doing world history in high school, but that is an AP class.

Just don't expect your 16 year old to settle in as quickly as the younger ones, and try and be as supportive as you can with all the small crappy stuff she will go through. Good luck sweety, keep in touch on here and let us know how everything is going

Brat1

Thanks for that.

We did spend a lot of time trying to persuade her to stay until the end of the school year and she could have lived with my mum and dad. But she was adamant that she wanted to come with us.

I doooo feel guilty for pulling her away from her friends and everything that she's used to and the guilt isn't helping the emotional grenade which is going on in my head at the moment. I hope she can cope with everything that is ahead and come out the other end a more confident and social person.

I would imagine that if we pull together as a family and support each other, then it will be slightly easier.

Thanks guys. I appreciate any advice on how to make it as smooth as possible or of any pitfalls which I've maybe not thought about

trottytrue

Brad1.. Your daughter can always return home if she is not happy nothing is final. They may fit in perfectly well.

Mummy in the foothills

I've been here 25 years (with a year off midway for good behavior) the corn fed GM meat that most normal families can afford sucks. Use regular Po folk can't afford that organic grass fed fancy schmancy meat, I have three kids to feed, and two of those are as big as Dh.
I shop Safeway (I gotta they pay Dh's wages ) I'm used to the taste so are my kids, but when we got back I can taste the goodness in the meat my Mom cooks, and the bread tastes better and the butter and the bacon etc etc.
European chocolate tastes fine, but it's still not what I want and it's expensive, I want a little quick bar of chocolate in the car Cadburys would be the ideal.
Decent groceries in UK are cheaper, I've done my list online a few times at Tesco.

Englishtart

Well if it's her decision, she will have to live with that, as Totty says, there is always the 'open door' for her to go back if she really hates it. I would tell her though that she has to give it at least 6 months before making a choice to leave the US, mainly because it will take her at least that long to really know and accept the differences here.

It's never easy making the choice to uproot children, changing schools is hard enough for them, and they are changing countries too, so that is extra stress on you all, as you say being supportive of each other and being aware of some of the issues you are all facing will help.

Brat1

dunroving

I used to teach English (real English, I mean, in England), and was stunned when my first paper in my masters program(me) in the States came back covered in red ink! As you say, I very quickly learned to suck it up and spell the "wrong" way.

Englishtart

I still spell a lot of words the 'right' way My oldest son learnt to read/write in the UK, youngest in the US, the older one was constantly asking the younger one how to 'spell words the lazy way'

there are a lot of words spelt the US way, that just don't look right to me

Elvira

It can be hard for older kids on H4s when all their pals start to earn money from their part-time jobs.

Some universities charge out-of-state fees for non-LPRs, and they do not qualify for financial aid either.

Do you have a strategy in place to prevent them from aging out?