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moved back and not loving it

moved back and not loving it

Old Mar 23rd 2008, 1:58 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by LIBBY
Glad to see we are not the only mad ones out there!!

Lost an awful amount of money on going back to the UK the first time so went back to Oz with just enough to set up again but not buy......

Second time coming back to UK we had enough to set up here again but not to buy.......so therefore going with the bare essentials.

Dont know when we will be able to afford it but it will have to be before April 2010 as the visa runs out then.

The thing is this time round we made lots of friends who we have kept in touch with so be able to borrow a spare room for the initial 2 or 3 weeks till we find somewhere to rent, which will save a bit.


Sorry lisaroo, hijacking your thread

was it adelaide you were living?

I think the decision to go home can be hard but to then when you there decide to come back is even harder i imagine

What has made you want to come back again? just curious as you sounded so happy when you got back to the uk.

good luck to you and your family!!
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 7:02 am
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by LIBBY
It gets under your skin doesnt it....the Ozzy life

Ping ponged, not once, but twice and now saving up like mad idiots to go again

We came back twice because of emotional rubbish and nothing changed and now we need to do what it right for ourselves.....

I just wish it didnt cost so much.

Oh and no one knows of our intentions either.....its going to destroy my Mum
I just have to say I cant belive you are doing it again. After reading your posts in MBTTUK I thought you were back and settled.

I think you are incredibly brave and wish you all the luck in the world.

Here's to 3rd time lucky
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 7:10 am
  #48  
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by thpinkpussycat
I just have to say I cant belive you are doing it again. After reading your posts in MBTTUK I thought you were back and settled.

I think you are incredibly brave and wish you all the luck in the world.

Here's to 3rd time lucky

Ditto to that.

Libby and family, I truly hope that you find whatever it is you are looking for this time.
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 7:16 am
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by LIBBY
Glad to see we are not the only mad ones out there!!

Lost an awful amount of money on going back to the UK the first time so went back to Oz with just enough to set up again but not buy......

Second time coming back to UK we had enough to set up here again but not to buy.......so therefore going with the bare essentials.

Dont know when we will be able to afford it but it will have to be before April 2010 as the visa runs out then.

The thing is this time round we made lots of friends who we have kept in touch with so be able to borrow a spare room for the initial 2 or 3 weeks till we find somewhere to rent, which will save a bit.


Sorry lisaroo, hijacking your thread
It's a lot easier Libby coming back when you have a network here. Our social life here is very busy. In UK it was non-existent on a local level - much harder to connect in a new area.
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 7:23 am
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by Betty Boot
Feel like I could have written most of this myself!! We lived in the hills in perth for 6 years and i really didnt appreciate it! Think i was always feeling bad about leaving my mum Anyway, we have been back in UK almost 2 years now and am getting those longings to go back to Oz - cant believe i am even thinking about it after how i sometimes felt in Oz I came back purely for family reasons and although i enjoy having the grandparents here I too have realised that me and my family ie hubby and 2 kids are the main priority. Although my kids now have their grandparents i feel they are missing out on what oz had to offer. I miss the weather, the outdoors, the space, the innocence of the kids (they grow up too quickly here), I miss doing family things - just the 4 of us (i used to wish there was others to share it with now i am sick of fitting in with others - must have become very selfish). Anyway, i could go on forever about why i want to go back, thankfully hubby would go back tomorrow if i wanted! Just worried about seperating the kids from family, they were only 3.5 and 1.5 when we left so they have little memory of it so dont miss it. Also believe it would kill my mum, she was so ill emotionally when we were away for 6 years, she is now a totally different person - oh what to do, why must we feel guilty for wanting the best for ourselves and kids?? I am an only child so the guilt is worse

Thanks for listening
It sounds like moving again would be even harder - very tough. Would your Mum consider going too? If you are citizens your Mum could probably go too as a parent of a lone child (I think). It seems that many of us who returned, at roughly the same time, found being back in the UK very hard going.
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 10:11 am
  #51  
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by ShozInOz
It sounds like moving again would be even harder - very tough. Would your Mum consider going too? If you are citizens your Mum could probably go too as a parent of a lone child (I think). It seems that many of us who returned, at roughly the same time, found being back in the UK very hard going.
It feels near on impossible to be honest! Mum come over to oz for holiday every year but it was only when we moved back that she told me how much she didnt like the place and she didnt know how i could live there Even if she did want to come with us i think the waiting list for parents is about 15 years now unless you can afford to pay then its about 2 years

So ShozInOz are you back in Oz already? I know you were saying 2008 - that has come around quickly! How has the move back been, harder second time around?
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 11:36 am
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by Betty Boot
Feel like I could have written most of this myself!! We lived in the hills in perth for 6 years and i really didnt appreciate it! Think i was always feeling bad about leaving my mum Anyway, we have been back in UK almost 2 years now and am getting those longings to go back to Oz - cant believe i am even thinking about it after how i sometimes felt in Oz I came back purely for family reasons and although i enjoy having the grandparents here I too have realised that me and my family ie hubby and 2 kids are the main priority. Although my kids now have their grandparents i feel they are missing out on what oz had to offer. I miss the weather, the outdoors, the space, the innocence of the kids (they grow up too quickly here), I miss doing family things - just the 4 of us (i used to wish there was others to share it with now i am sick of fitting in with others - must have become very selfish). Anyway, i could go on forever about why i want to go back, thankfully hubby would go back tomorrow if i wanted! Just worried about seperating the kids from family, they were only 3.5 and 1.5 when we left so they have little memory of it so dont miss it. Also believe it would kill my mum, she was so ill emotionally when we were away for 6 years, she is now a totally different person - oh what to do, why must we feel guilty for wanting the best for ourselves and kids?? I am an only child so the guilt is worse

Thanks for listening
Your situation is very similar to our own although we are still in Oz. I am the only child too and the guilt is sooo bad especially at the mo with baby no 2 due in 4 weeks time. Parents also have a business that they want us to take over too and are promising us this and that when we return in a couple of years, I keep saying IF we return and keep getting loads of grief and tears from Mum. Got really cross the other day as both parents were pressurising me and pushing us to see when exactly we were coming home and I got so upset that I put the phone down on them and didnt ring them for several days. Felt very cross and told them so and they havent mentioned it since. While they were over here in December they kept telling us they couldnt understand why we were over here, when we had had such a fantastic life in England. Ok so it is very different for us over here, I had to admit and I do get very frustrated with stupid things like ridiculous speed limits, crap driving, no 24 hour shopping in Tescos, and no lovely Sainsburys with every type of organic vegetable you could possibly get, fab friends, the list goes on. But and I cant believe Im going to say this as I have been sooo homesick, Im getting used to it over here now and as we are slowly getting to know people and make friends its starting to get easier!!! I cant wait to go back to the UK for a holiday and see all the relatives and friends and that I do really miss but Im sure we will be very glad to get back to the laid back life and more innocent life for the children up here in the Perth Hills. We will go back once we have our passports and probably take over the business but I know in my heart we will always come back here and probably be ping pongers too, who knows, you only have one life so you might as well live it for yourselves and your children. That sounds so selfish I know and I cant beieve I have written all this. I wish you all the luck in the world with all your decisions in the future.
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Old Mar 24th 2008, 2:03 pm
  #53  
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by rockpeblar
Your situation is very similar to our own although we are still in Oz. I am the only child too and the guilt is sooo bad especially at the mo with baby no 2 due in 4 weeks time. Parents also have a business that they want us to take over too and are promising us this and that when we return in a couple of years, I keep saying IF we return and keep getting loads of grief and tears from Mum. Got really cross the other day as both parents were pressurising me and pushing us to see when exactly we were coming home and I got so upset that I put the phone down on them and didnt ring them for several days. Felt very cross and told them so and they havent mentioned it since. While they were over here in December they kept telling us they couldnt understand why we were over here, when we had had such a fantastic life in England. Ok so it is very different for us over here, I had to admit and I do get very frustrated with stupid things like ridiculous speed limits, crap driving, no 24 hour shopping in Tescos, and no lovely Sainsburys with every type of organic vegetable you could possibly get, fab friends, the list goes on. But and I cant believe Im going to say this as I have been sooo homesick, Im getting used to it over here now and as we are slowly getting to know people and make friends its starting to get easier!!! I cant wait to go back to the UK for a holiday and see all the relatives and friends and that I do really miss but Im sure we will be very glad to get back to the laid back life and more innocent life for the children up here in the Perth Hills. We will go back once we have our passports and probably take over the business but I know in my heart we will always come back here and probably be ping pongers too, who knows, you only have one life so you might as well live it for yourselves and your children. That sounds so selfish I know and I cant beieve I have written all this. I wish you all the luck in the world with all your decisions in the future.
Thank you, i can totally understand where you are coming from and it is made worse from having children! We have 2 children - my parents only grandchildren - more added pressure! We lived not so far from you in High Wycombe, it used to drive me mad sometimes but i do miss the laid back way of life, i think i could cope with it all now as i know what to expect. This sounds awful but my one happiest time in Oz was when my family stopped talking to me, we had an argument about people pressuring us to come home, I told them what I thought of them, they told me i was selfish, etc, etc and we didnt talk for months, it was my happiest time in Oz because there was no pressure, no phone calls with tears, etc. Of course we all started talking again, the family came over for a holiday and we then moved back. Sorry to ramble, its nice to know someone can relate to how you feel. I cant advise you to stay or leave because although i regret i am not in oz now i dont regret coming back - does that make sense, we had to do it really, it will just be harder to leave again Wishing you and yours all the best

PS the novelty of tescos, sainsburys food selection does eventually wear off - although it is only starting to after 2 years back
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Old Mar 27th 2008, 11:17 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Cheered me up abit. Have been back 3 weeks and life seems to be a mess really to some point but after what we faced we can not moan. We set off sold up and everything sent three boxes over full of things we could not live without,
our little girl who became very sick in Singapore, was in hospital for over a week and thought she was not going to get better and a proff was going to be called because she was so ill, and when we got to Melbourne OH job fell through and there was not a chance of him finding work due to a dry up of his trade a stonemason. So it seemed a couple of months and taking a load paid job could never cover the rents, bills may be it could be said we could of tried harder. I did not want to lose the deposit to a house.

The girls love being back at their old school and friends seem happy to see us and family . But we love Australia and so want to return, I cant help but think
when it pours down and it just seems rush rush.
Trying to see about retraining and ways to have two skilled jobs to give us more of a chance. Sorry to jump on and its long!! but I thought I was the only one .
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Old Mar 28th 2008, 3:09 am
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by Nikki.P
Hi there. I'm really sorry to hear that you've moved. I hope the next wee while goes well for you and you get back to Perth sooner rather than later. All the best. Nikki
I think you are getting confused with Currambine, WA. Currumbin is on the GC.

I wish all you 'lost souls' the very best of luck. I know what's it's like to be unsettled and it's not good.
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Old Mar 28th 2008, 9:08 am
  #56  
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by LIBBY
Glad to see we are not the only mad ones out there!!

Lost an awful amount of money on going back to the UK the first time so went back to Oz with just enough to set up again but not buy......

Second time coming back to UK we had enough to set up here again but not to buy.......so therefore going with the bare essentials.

Dont know when we will be able to afford it but it will have to be before April 2010 as the visa runs out then.

The thing is this time round we made lots of friends who we have kept in touch with so be able to borrow a spare room for the initial 2 or 3 weeks till we find somewhere to rent, which will save a bit.


Sorry lisaroo, hijacking your thread
Hey Libby! I'm really sorry your move back to the UK did not work out for you - you guys must have spent a ton of money going back and forth.

Hope you eventually find the life you are looking for whether it be the UK or Oz, good luck honeyxx
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Old Mar 28th 2008, 3:12 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Thanks for all the positive stuff

Sorry not been back on before but had the flu...thought I had flu before but no.....this was full on flu and very horrible.

Yes as you have probably realised its not working here......feeling very resentful towards family back here.....the main reason we came back!!

They have been worse and its made me realise that we have to do what is right for my family, which is Myself my hubby and my 2 lovey children and thats it......! harsh as it sounds.

Trouble is, its cost the earth and we have to start saving again as we have no savings and no house sale rely on so this time will be the last and we will earn every airmile over there.

Thankyou to you supportive, you are great.

LibbyX
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Old Mar 28th 2008, 4:09 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

I am with you on this one, when my daughter was sick in hospital my family phoned all the time and making me so homesick and making feel leaving to go the other side of the world was madness. Now I am back not seen anyone for weeks and OH family dont phone and its like we are being black balled. I am really glad to see this post because I thought it was only us that felt in middle earth!!!
Esther x

Originally Posted by LIBBY
Thanks for all the positive stuff

Sorry not been back on before but had the flu...thought I had flu before but no.....this was full on flu and very horrible.

Yes as you have probably realised its not working here......feeling very resentful towards family back here.....the main reason we came back!!

They have been worse and its made me realise that we have to do what is right for my family, which is Myself my hubby and my 2 lovey children and thats it......! harsh as it sounds.

Trouble is, its cost the earth and we have to start saving again as we have no savings and no house sale rely on so this time will be the last and we will earn every airmile over there.

Thankyou to you supportive, you are great.

LibbyX
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Old Mar 28th 2008, 4:16 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Libby I really admire you, even tho you`ve came back and forth, you have to do it sometimes to see where you are most at home! good on ya for admitting where you`d rather be, some ppl come home (UK) and pretend its fantastic and everythings hunky dory-putting on a persona BUT they wish they had stayed in OZ,

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Old Mar 28th 2008, 4:31 pm
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Default Re: moved back and not loving it

Originally Posted by estherg
I am with you on this one, when my daughter was sick in hospital my family phoned all the time and making me so homesick and making feel leaving to go the other side of the world was madness. Now I am back not seen anyone for weeks and OH family dont phone and its like we are being black balled. I am really glad to see this post because I thought it was only us that felt in middle earth!!!
Esther x


Its made me realise who my family are!!!!

Esther, I hope you find your happiness, if it means going back to Oz then do it, and good luck to you.

Blue Kipper.....I was toying with the idea of not posting at all because I do feel a bit of a failure, but really emotional blackmail is not my failing.....its giving in to it that is, and if I can highlight to just one person out there who is on the verge of coming back through the same reasons as me, and make them see its not the answer, then thats great. (if I am making sense that great too as I have the flu)

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