68MEVY

It's been over 6 years since we settled on the Gold Coast from Sheffield, our little family of 3 has now become 5 and I thought I was happy - then we went to England for Christmas and it felt so homely it's given me a new view on my life over in Oz.
I have no family here, my hubby's family are here but they're not mine if you know what I mean. I have extremely fantastic friends back in England - here I struggle meeting people that become more than aquaintences (SP?) due to my solitary job - I love my job, I run my own family day care business from home which means I get to stay with my own little ones, I seriously do not want to change thet, it just means I've had to get used to parents and children being my only real conversation and I can't cross borders into real friendship with these people. My hubby's great which is good as he has to listen to all my moans and groans aswell as all the happy stuff. I did go to meet ups in the beginning but as you have babies and work full time it becomes increasingly harder to get out and about.
I think we've decided that being here isn't right for us and we're verging towards moving somewhere more rural as in close communities you atleast get to know your neighbours - or so it seems? We need a bigger house now anyway so will be needing to explore our options, and I've always fancied a bit of land for vegies and chooks aswell as playspace for the children and dogs
I think the trip back to England has made me reallise I could easily settle back in over there - do I really want to? No, because I know there are more opportunities for my children here as they grow up and as much as I'm moaning I do love the surroundings and more laid back attitude.
Looks like I'll be trying to head back out to meeting people that may turn into friends as I think that is the major factor affecting me, sometimes it's nice for people to rock up for a coffee or give you a call and chat about crap Just wish I could pick up just one member of my family and plonk them into my life over here!

brgitte

Hi there Little Unsettled, an Aussie who's been in England for 5 years & I sympathise. I sometimes really miss home too but we've decided to stay living in England for 5 or so more years because we like working with the British. I have had both good & bad neighbours here & back home but I wouldn't move just beacuse of the neighbours. That's not Australian! Also consider that moving to the Bush can be extremely lonely as there are lack of things to do. Also Country Towns can be a bit parochial in Oz. Perhaps you should join a club or get out & do a hobby. Set up a walking group that helps. Just pop flyers in Neighbours letter boxes. Now living in a horrible place as we finally bought a house & the area is all we could afford. Caversham is not us -Hubby & Me good news as we've applied for British Citizenship we are now able to borrow more & will be upsizing soon. Keep smiling & enjoy thre sunshine

tiredwithtwins

hiya chick!
Wow, you have been there 6 years!!???? time flies!!
you dont want to come back to sheffield, believe me!
there are no jobs, the infrastructure is falling apart and the place is going to ruin ... but i hate sheffield and would much rather be in GC!! But here i stay

congratulations on the additions ... boys? girls?

sue xx

Petals

Gosh we have been here a long long time now and our children are grown up. However we lived in suburbia and just like you with babies and work it was difficult to meet people. Joined the baby groups etc, kindergarten, school but no really any friends just acquaintances. So we moved to the Mornington Peninsula bought some acreage land when the children were in grade 1 and 2. It was completely different, everyone around was building too, all had young children like us, we could let the children roam around then and they had a normal childhood. We made friends and one of them is my best friend of over twenty five years now. Still know people around the place even though our area has now become somewhat suburban.

So look for an area that is being developed in the country with families like yours and life just happens.

My children know everyone still and when they come home and visit they are hardly here as they have so many people to catch up with.

Living on acreage I feel we do not feel so pressured as when there is someone just over the fence and people seem to relax more in their space.

Good luck hope you can find somewhere like where we live. They will carry us out in boxes from here.

mika24me

We were also very unsettled after a few years in Oz (4 years in our case) and decided to move back to Scotland. The recession took us by surprise a few months after getting back and we were also thrown by the house sizes over there. I mean we knew they were smaller, but with 2 extra mouths to feed (which swiftly became 4 when my twins were born) it was cramped and stressful.

Not to say you shouldn't move back, but have a while of researching where you would live in the UK, what sort of house you could afford, and how your family would slot into that. You might find that things wouldn't be so bad over there, or you might have a look and think "no way could I do that".

The UK is brilliant. I am far from slagging it off. However after life in Australia we found it too hard to settle back into life over there, with a small house and a long commute. Poor wages due to the recession had a lot to do with that. Maybe consider a move back once the economic pressure is off a bit?

For meeting people, you could try joining a tafe class or similar? I was in the same boat until I started uni. I met people, but rarely would they become firm friends. But when you have a similar academic interest things change a lot and I have met some wonderful people as a result.

Good luck

LINZI

I could of wrote this post myself! We have also been here 6 years and are still unsettled with the friends situation. You are aiming for what i want to

I have sent you a pm.
Linzi

68MEVY

I've got no intention of moving back - visiting England just made me realise what is actually missing from my life out here. It's hard to get out with my little ones, I've another year before one starts prep and my youngest has just turned 2, then there's my 10 year old too - with a hubby working long hours I never get a minute to get out without them and I work 5 days (inc Sat) too. I know you have to make the effort to get out and about but it is really hard. However, my little man has just gone into pre prep on a 5 day fortnight leaving me with every other Wednesday just me and my youngest - I don't work Wednesdays - so think I'll be hunting around for something the 2 of us can do to get out and about. My choice of job and I love it but it is very lonely sometimes and as much as there are coordinators and other educators I can talk to that is all it is.
The idea of further study has crossed my mind, I'm about to finish a course I've done through correspondence and will probably take it further but would enrol at a local uni/tafe to do it so I'm seeing others with same interests.

We've spoken about it and i think what we need is to move to an area like Petals said, we need more room, I'd love an acre+ so when the time comes we need to choose carefully and fingers crossed we can find the community feel I'm looking for - even if I have to set up some sort of group
We shall see, it's not all doom and gloom, I still love it here

and Sue, hello stranger I had a boy - Ethan who is 4 and an absolute bugger, followed by Paige who turned 2 last week and worships the ground Libby walks on I loved my 3 weeks in Sheffield but it certainly wasn't the place I loved - more the people and my family