Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
Dec 7th 2017, 11:27 pm
#16
Concierge
Joined: Jan 2013
Location: Western Australia
Posts: 21,139
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
HALP!
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch. I'm beside myself.
Any ideas how to get this lovely, elegant woman trained so she doesn't eat like a prospectin' miner from the San Francisco gold rush?
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch. I'm beside myself.
Any ideas how to get this lovely, elegant woman trained so she doesn't eat like a prospectin' miner from the San Francisco gold rush?
Dec 7th 2017, 11:34 pm
#17
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,391
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
Tonight I made a meatloaf with quartered potatoes and carrots cut to bite size surrounding it. No knife required. Easy to cut the meatloaf with the side of the fork and use only one utensil for the entire meal
Of course, tines were up, not down.
Dec 7th 2017, 11:41 pm
#18
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2016
Location: Harrisburg, PA (formerly Somerset, UK)
Posts: 538
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
And there I was, gauche enough to call my husband a shocking neanderthal...
Dec 8th 2017, 12:16 am
#20
Peace onion
Thread Starter
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Denver
Posts: 5,686
Dec 8th 2017, 12:43 am
#21
`
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 38,613
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
HALP!
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch.
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch.
Conversely though, he will use a knife and fork to cut up & eat spaghetti when he should be using a fork in the correct hand & a spoon if unable to twirl properly.
I'm beside myself.
Dec 8th 2017, 3:54 am
#23
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 2,903
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
HALP!
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch. I'm beside myself.
Any ideas how to get this lovely, elegant woman trained so she doesn't eat like a prospectin' miner from the San Francisco gold rush?
It's driving me nuts. I'm sure it's been done to death in Pet Peeves or TIO, but how can I convince my wife to use knife in dominant hand and fork in other hand, tines down?
She ignores her knife and does the cutting-with-the-side-of-the-fork, and then shovel fork tines up.
I guess I should be grateful she doesn't do the zig-zag/fork switch. I'm beside myself.
Any ideas how to get this lovely, elegant woman trained so she doesn't eat like a prospectin' miner from the San Francisco gold rush?
There's nothing uncouth about the way she eats. She eats the way she was brought up, and presumably has an American accent to prove it! Deal with it. Tell your (Brit) friends and family to deal with it too!
After all, she could be doing something worse, like maybe calling her handbag a purse!
It'd be a great wedding!
Dec 8th 2017, 11:21 am
#26
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2009
Location: Italy
Posts: 2,669
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
I'm with you 100% on this one . It does my head in. MrBEVS from Wolverhampton UK tries to get away with this at times but my beetling eyebrows soon stops him. Keep the utensils in the correct hand whilst eating and use them MrBEVS . You are no longer a toddler and should be able to use a knife and fork properly at the dinner table. If your hands get a little weary with this onerous task, put down both utensils and pause. It is unseemly to be pushing and stabbing your food around , tines up, peas or no peas, with the spare hand and arm waving about , clutching a glass or flopped in one's lap
Conversely though, he will use a knife and fork to cut up & eat spaghetti when he should be using a fork in the correct hand & a spoon if unable to twirl properly.
You have my sympathy.
Conversely though, he will use a knife and fork to cut up & eat spaghetti when he should be using a fork in the correct hand & a spoon if unable to twirl properly.
You have my sympathy.
A knife! for spaghetti- ye gods!
Dec 8th 2017, 1:52 pm
#27
I have a comma problem
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: Fox Lake, IL (from Carrickfergus NI)
Posts: 49,598
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
Does anyone actually give a **** about stupid shit like this? Other than irritating toffs and wannabees, of course.
If she keeps her mouth shut when she eats you're already way ahead. The switching hands method might be ridiculously inefficient but it's not like she's out squishing babies or running over pensioners or anything.
If she keeps her mouth shut when she eats you're already way ahead. The switching hands method might be ridiculously inefficient but it's not like she's out squishing babies or running over pensioners or anything.
Dec 8th 2017, 4:13 pm
#29
WTF?
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Homeostasis
Posts: 79,367
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
Dec 8th 2017, 4:24 pm
#30
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Milwaukie, Oregon
Posts: 9,966
Re: Help with couth wife being uncouth at the dinner table
That is why burgers are best, they can be held in the hands to eat, and the french fries can be picked up with the fingers. No utensils needed at all.