Jamackabi

So it's almost time for my family and I to make our big move and depart this island I have called home for 33 years. We fly to Pittsburgh this Friday. To say I have a bunch of different emotions is an understatement! The overall one is that of excitement! Moving Stateside has been my dream since I was 12. My parents used to send me off to California for 6 weeks ever summer until I left home at 18. They say it was so I could get to know my American family, but looking back, it was so they could have a break from me! Despite visiting more times than I can remember, with and without my wife, I am sure living there will be a whole lot different to "just visiting".

Knowing this is my last working week in the U.K is a little surreal. I have been checked out mentally from work since I handed in my notice last month, so I'm literally just counting down the hours now. Fortunately, I have secured a really good job locally which has helped massively reduce the stress levels of moving. I'm not sure what we'd have done if we had moved without at least one of us having a job to start immediately. It just removes any concerns we had about Health Insurance etc.

The past few weeks have been pretty sad. We've said goodbye to my parents, my siblings, and our friends. I really had no idea how difficult this would be. One of our biggest reasons for moving is because we live pretty far away from my family, so do not have much of a support network when it comes to raising our 1-year-old twins. We'll have a massive amount of support once we move. The past month or so has been spent with family and friends who we probably don't see as much as we should, and it's been nice. You almost question whether you're making the right decision, but then you realise it's not always like that, and you are all making an effort because you're leaving.

I have no doubt there will be ups and downs, and periods of time when I might feel really out of place in a foreign land. But, I know that this is the right move for us. I hope within a few months it starts to feel like home. For all you guys who have made this move before, how long did it take before you truly felt settled? When did it feel like "home?". Thankfully we are moving at a good time of year with summer just around the corner, I 'm sure that will help with our settling in period!

Maste

Good luck with the move, and I hope you settle in ASAP.

I've not been here for a year yet, and as I originally came as a student I'm not really experiencing any homesickness or anything as it hasn't sunk in I'm staying instead of returning home at the end of my masters!

I think you need to remember why you moved, and keep in mind the things you love about it. You'll miss home, it's inevitable, but try and find hobbies and things to do in your new home that will keep you busy!

Rete

While my moving was from one end of the US to the other, I can sympathize with you and your cares. Some people adapt quickly feeling as if they have always been in their home while others (like me) are never fully content in their new homes and long for the place that still calls to them.

You are young with a wife and twins. While you had 20 odd years in the UK as home, you are moving to a country that is home to your family abroad and will now be home to you and your immediate family.

The twins will flourish and learn to speak without a British accent. They will welcome their trips back to the UK to visit their UK family members.

Embrace the new. Don't make assumptions about places, people, cultures or customs. But most of all don't compare. How someone holds their eating utensils is not important You can always buy the UK chocolate products you love and the tea and Bird's custard and tomato based beans for beans on toast.

Can't wait to read your follow up post in 6 to 12 months on how your household has settled in. Good luck to you and your lovely family.

Jamackabi

Thanks for the advice. You're right, I will need to remember the reasons why we moved and there are so many of them. I'm definitely going to get myself a hobby or two! I play a lot of golf, as does my father in law. I think he's pretty excited to be able to use me as an excuse to play even more golf than he usually would!

tom169

I've learned to stop comparing certain things to England. For example fish and chips. I judge American fish and chips as just that - American.

GeoffM

I prefer crispy fries to British chip shop chips anyway. The local British pub serves a decent proper fish (none of this triangular formed crap served virtually everywhere else) and American fries. Suits me!

Fun fact of the day: McDonald's fries in the UK contain about 4 ingredients. The US version contain around 8 ingredients. Why?! To me they taste and look the same. (numbers vary depending on source/season, and whether you count oil mixtures as one vegetable oil or multiple - I counted as one oil in both cases).

Jamackabi

Can I ask how long it took everyone to naturally adjust to American spellings? I have switched my language on my iPhone to American English to try and adjust, but there are more words that you initially think! I guess ultimately, spell check is my friend. But on one of those rare occasions I might actually use a pen and paper, I will no doubt forget!

Sounds like such a small thing, but probably one of the hardest to change! I'm also not looking forward to people not understanding what I am saying to them. I have a pretty neutral accent (grew up in Milton Keynes), but that still doesn't stop people looking at me with a blank expression whenever I order food or try and make conversation in the grocery store when I've been a visitor in the past.

Maste

I'm still adjusting. I have to get my wife to check my grad work for the correct American English spelling. Slowly getting there, I'm just not as careful/aware of it as I should/could be!

GeoffM

It depends on the audience. If it's a post on here then it would be in British English (usually). If I'm writing to a customer in the US then I would tend towards American spellings. Being a programmer in a past life we tended to use American anyway (color and gray being the prime examples). So I guess it didn't take me long.

My name, Geoff, is hard for Americans to wrap their head around. Most will try for "gee-off" instead of just "Jeff".

Phrases are more of an issue. How does one know that "Bob's your uncle*" is not familiar to Americans, and they will wonder what on earth you're going on about?

* Not sure I ever tried that one but that's the only pre-caffeine example I can come up with.

Rete

As a pure Yank, I've always found that the British accent makes conversation difficult. For me it is the way the word is pronounced that is a startling to the ear. I've never spoken with anyone from Australia so other than viewing an Australian movie, I would have assumed the accent to be a British dialect rather than Australian. From the friends I have made on this forum over the last 20 years that we have met in person and have become steadfast friends with over the years, I've found them to be extremely soft spoken and that often the words seem to be swallowed. Now those are just my observations and in no way speaks for the general population.

I have a kindle and have kindle unlimited membership so most of the books that are available to readers are British in origin. I've found it helpful, especially in the beginning of my reading of British mysteries, that the publisher has a glossary at the back of the book giving an explanation of the terms used throughout the novel.

I've found that in writing, there is such a vast difference from the American way of writing. I'm now use to the terms "car park" for parking lot, "boot" for trunk, "bed sit" for rental or apartment, etc. When I first encountered the term "toerag", I thought it referred to a person who wore the native male head dress from their country.

My British friends, and my one British boss, all have been able to adapt their speech to American English over time. It can make for many giggles when either they or I misunderstand each other.

As for your name, Geoff, I would never have thought it was pronounced Jeff.

GeoffM

Come to think of it, one of the more difficult things is talking to the kids with Americans around. Do I tell them it's in the gah-RAAAAAJJJ, or in the GAR-idge? Thankfully they get it.

I did have somebody once try to tell me to speak English. He won't try that with this Englishman again.

MidAtlantic

That was the big hurdle for me. Stop comparing foods, prices, cars and a load of other things. Just take things as they are.

gaviano

Chuckled a few times reading this thread. So much is oh so familiar. Yeah, I spent the first year or so converting dollars to pounds in my head to determine if something was cheap or not, I've successfully released "Bob's yer uncle" into my work place but sadly "fortnight" is still a work in progress, and it took five years to get my head to think in terms of mm/dd/yyyy so that when I see the British way now it looks weird. I adapted to US spelling quite quickly which is a never ending source of piss-taking from my UK friends on Facebook. My American stepdaughter says garage the Scottish way (garridge -- personal triumph). My American wife says tomato the British way, I now say it the American way and the other week I forgot how I'm supposed to pronounce oregano. I still say schedule properly. There are somethings I just refuse to give up, dammit!

gaviano

Oh, and everyone in my team at work is now addicted to Tunnock's Tea Cakes.

gaviano

The OP has made me remember my final days in the UK. After four months waiting for L1-B approval, the embassy visit and departure all happened within a week. It was a surreal experience in many ways, mostly because there was part of me that thought it wouldn't happen, that some spanner would find its way into the works. Until I got to Edinburgh Airport, said goodbye to my mum and walked towards security when I distinctly remember thinking, "Well, I guess I'm moving to America, then." Six years on and I still have a few pinch myself moments, I still catch myself sitting in a meeting at work wondering how on earth this happened or marveling at the fact that the first time I was in Michigan was the day I moved to Michigan. Enjoy these hours and days, Jamackabi. They'll stay with you for a long time.