Pablo

Yes, it is frustrating. And what Ed and Martyn tell you about the lunatic inconsistency of the official advice is spot on. However, you can see too that the authorities might suspect you are trying to game the system.

Granting residency rights on the basis of marriage was how things worked orginally, and it was pretty straightforward to establish whether a person was married or not. Of course the definitions have subsequently been broadened to accommodate same-sex relationships which are in effect marriages but where formal marrage was not until recently possible. But it was never intended to grant those rights to people who just want to be with their boyfriend.

Have you received any advice from the High Commission in London at all yet?

girlgeek

Thank you for your input. I feel however that your additional comments were neither understanding of my original post nor particularly warranted or helpful.

I am interested how you think people get to the point of a relationship where they marry? More often than not, people choose to live together for a period of time first. This is very hard to do whilst living in seperate countries. And either which way, in order for us to be able to live together, get married and live our lives, whether we chose to do that in SA or UK, we are looking at legislation that will mean we get married sooner than we may have done if we were both SA or UK.

My boyfriend and I have discussed marriage and had already planned to do so, the idiocy of aforementioned legislation means that we will do this sooner than we originally thought. We can prove the duration of our relationship via many methods (not that I really have to justify any of this to you) including trips backwards and forwards to visit one another.

But again, thank you very much for your (not very helpful) input.

Pablo

Well I'm sorry to offend, if I have offended. You may be right that I have missed, or misunderstood, your original post. I'm not quite sure which is the original.

My understanding was that you do not qualify for Permanent Residence or for a temporary residence+work permit in your own right. You are therefore trying to gain these rights on the grounds that your boyfriend is your spouse. Trouble is, you don't meet the criteria laid out for that route.

And you think this is unfair - I get that. I think you are irritated that I just tried to point out the authorities' side of things, that they have to apply some rule to minimise abuse, and sometimes this feels unjust.

You ask me how I think people get to the point of getting married when they are in your situation. Well, as you say, the small details of your situation are none of my business, but clearly people do manage it. And indeed you have managed successfully to get to the point where you're considering marriage in spite of the obstacles. So you're almost there.

Not sure who pointed it out - ED perhaps. But when the rules are so complicated, inconsistent and also inconsistency enforced, the alternative option although messier is more straightforward. Go on a temporary (i.e., tourist) permit and, if you wanted to, seek an extension when there (ED, can you still do this?). You could not work legally though.

You mentioned you had approached immigration agencies. Have none given you advice yet? Surely if you have paid them they must give you something. Other than that, as ED has said, reading the rules laid out on the Home Affairs site, or even the primary legislation, can help if you need to see what the rules actually say.

And what about your boyfriend? If he's already there on the ground, he could perhaps arrange to speak to Home Affairs on your behalf.

ededed

Pablo is a fountain of knowledge and much-needed common sense. I think his response was actually quite helpful and sincere. Don't shoot the messenger, these are questions you need to answer if you want to make this work.

There's the rub. You'll get far more useful (and impartial) information from Home Affairs in London than any agency that charges a fee (which I bet isn't non-refundable if you don't get your visa?) and I daresay more than the boyfriend will find by going to an office in SA. It a huge pain in the arse, but you need to speak to someone who deals with this on a daily basis and is involved in making the yes or no decisions. That's what I did having been around the houses for months. It cost £3 a minute to book the appointment - more money for Nkandla - and I had to go to Whitehall, but when I was there the office was staffed by people used to dealing with first world environments and able to give clear and helpful advice. This is the polar opposite of any SA-based office. I cannot stress enough how bad and misleading the South African arm of Home Affairs is. How agencies can claim to be able to circumvent this is beyond me.

I don't know if you need to be married before getting a spousal visa. I know SA is very liberal and recognises same-sex civil partnerships, but doubt this extends to simply cohabiting. I am sure that you do need to be cohabiting at the very least, and probably for a matter of years. You need to follow the advice on the government website.

And yes - you can go for a visit and extend when you are there, but you can't work without a work permit. If you are doing casual (cash in hand) work, then you almost certainly won't have a problem - but given there is 40% unemployment, the hourly rate you can earn for what will be menial work won't cover your petrol. No-one will employ you in any formal capacity without a work permit at the very least.

I hope this helps - please feel free to ask any questions and we'll try and help. We want this to work for you - we just don't want to paint a picture that suggests it won't be stress-inducingly difficult. SA is amazing - it'll be worth it if you can make it work.